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Communication skills...how & why
Transcript of Communication skills...how & why
What is it?
Communication is a skill we learn and develop throughout our lives.
Most people are born with the ability to talk and, from the day we are born, we learn to speak and communicate.
We learn these skills from the people closest to us. Our personalities and the WAY we communicate are shaped by what we see and experience.
Why do we communicate?
To get or give information
To show how we feel
To persuade and get what we want
To make relationships
Asking someone to do you a favour or to help you out
Getting people to do or believe what you want them to
Being able to share your opinion and for it to be listened to
To give or get facts
Use instructions, access news and attend interviews
Our society lives on information using social media and it has become very important to us to be able to access it quickly and often
To make connections with other people
Support, comfort, understanding, friendship and love
This is probably the most important as humans are happiest when they are together
Building relationships help us to fulfill our basic needs like food and shelter
Movies and TV
Playing video games
Chatting with friends
Reading a book
To develop your own thinking and how to express yourself
To be able to questions things and learn to ask why
To feel comfortable to share your ideas and thoughts
To help you to form an opinion about something
What is it?
Communication is all about GIVING your thoughts, feelings and ideas to other people so you are clearly understood.
But it is also about TAKING the information that others are giving to you.
So, the SENDER...
...and the RECEIVER...
...both understand the SAME information!
There are TWO main types of communication
Sending and receiving messages using WORDS
Sending and receiving messages WITHOUT WORDS
Tone of voice
...what do you think is going on here?
You need to be able to change how you talk to match the Environment you are in.
Using your knowledge of non-verbal communication...
How do we do it and why we do it?
What do our words and actions say about us?
How do we communicate?
We actually all know a lot about communication skills.
We mostly react to what we see and hear without even thinking about it!
And most of the time we don't even know we are doing it.
It's the result of all we have learned as we have grown up
If we don't have the influences of love and human interaction in our lives, we learn to behave in different ways.
How would someone who has no contact with humans behave?
This video shows Oxana Malaya. A 'Feral child'.
More than Words?
Watch this clip...
Words can have different meanings
We often have to be careful to use the language that is suited to our situation...
Would you speak to your mates the same way you would your Nan?
Try to think of as many meanings as you can for the following words...
Your Body talks?
...and the way we say these WORDS can change the meaning of them.
"You are really funny"
The following are just general guidelines and are usually most noticeable during intense emotional situations like arguments, job interviews or face to face meetings when the person is feeling most vulnerable.
The way we carry ourselves, how we speak and how we use our bodies are often unconscious (and sometimes conscious) actions that express our feelings.
"Body language" experts claim to know how and when your body shows the truth about when you may be hiding something.
Reading body language is not always accurate and depends on the situation and the person.
Unconscious actions, such as touching or slightly scratching the face, MAY signal lying.
As young children sometimes cover their mouths when lying, adults often copy this effect by touching their forehead, nose or cheek.
Nervousness can also cause this.
Touching Your Face
Crossing your legs is usually a signal that you're closing yourself off.
To help you when you're in an interview or meeting, keep your legs UNCROSSED, knees together and plant both feet firmly on the ground.
This syncs the right and left sides (hemispheres) of your brain and experts believe that it helps you to think and respond more clearly.
Crossing your legs
Biting your lip can be a leftover habit from childhood that some haven't been able to break.
People who bite their lip CAN be seen as vulnerable, embarrassed and shy.
It's a nervous habit and is often a TELL for inexperienced liars.
The lip bite
The key here is don't fake it!
A forced smile can often be a dead giveaway that you are not happy or don’t like someone.
Women are social smilers and smile 70% more than men.
When smiling, use your mouth and your eyes! Otherwise it can look really fake.
Crossing your arms CAN be a sign of disapproval or closing yourself off.
You MAY be sending a message that you are putting up barriers and closing a part of yourself off from other people.
But sometimes it is just the way we sit comfortably.
In an interview setting try to keep your arms at your sides and use open palms.
On their own, one BODY LANGUAGE gesture is NOT enough to tell us something.
Unconsciously fiddling with jewelery, hands and hair. Chewing your thumb, jiggling your legs and chewing on a pen are called DISPLACEMENT activities and generally display nervousness.
If you're in an interview, keep jewelery to a minimum and make sure to place your hands on your lap.
TOO MUCH fidgeting can put off an interviewer and it may be the ONLY thing they remember about you.
For you to get an accurate reading you should look for CLUSTERS of behaviour.
It is QUITE LIKELY that this person is not happy in your company AND may be lying or hiding something
On their own, a fake smile, lip biting and touching of the face may go unnoticed. But when they are ALL shown in a short space of time, they become more meaningful.
ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS
What you DO is more important than what you SAY
In other words....
is communicated through the actual words you say
of your message is non verbal using body language, gestures and your vocal tone
in a face to face conversation
THE WAY YOU SAY IT
WHAT IS ACTUALLY SAID