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Transcript of Sexual Assault
Sexual Respect &
Chants during Orientation Week 2013 led to headlines around the world.
St. Mary's University
Varsity men's hockey program suspended for the 2014/2015 year following an investigation into an alleged sexual assault by 3 members of the team.
University of Ottawa
MediaSmart's 2014 study found that 40% of Canadian male high school students disclosed searching for pornography online.
Residence Life Supervisor
Student Counselling Services
firstname.lastname@example.org, x 4554
Why talk about sexual assault and sexual respect?
Of this group, one third identified doing so daily.
In the St. Mary's University report, it was found that overwhelmingly, students reported feeling that there were
in their understanding of consent, particularly when alcohol is involved.
Experts say this leads to the
'pornification of culture'
Why might it be problematic for our cultural standard of healthy sexuality to be defined by porn?
Where do we get our ideas about sexual respect from?
This tells us that young people we work with here may not have a good understanding of what consent is, and what sexual assault and sexual harassment are.
In their poem "One Color", about their experiences of sexual assault in their teen years, Neil Hilborn and Ollie Renee Schminkey say;
"This is preventable, so someone must be responsible for preventing it. We can teach this better”
Today we are hoping to
'teach this better'
, and we are hoping that you will teach others who may need this info.
Consent & Coercion
Part of 'teaching it better' is making sure that we all have an understanding of consent and coercion.
What does 'coercion' mean?
What does it mean to be 'coerced'?
Most of us learn coercion as children, when adults in our lives may use coercive power in order to get us to do things that they want/need us to do.
When someone uses their coercive power
against us, we learn that
a) we have to learn to tolerate when
someone crosses our boundaries, and
b) that if we have power, we can
use it to compel people to do things
that they may not want to do.
What might coercion look like in a sexual context?
What does 'consent' mean?
What the Law Says About Consent
What is the 'age of consent' in Canada?
In Canada, you are considered able to give consent to '
'. This includes everything from kissing and touching to intercourse.
There are Exceptions...
The Age of Consent Becomes 18...
If the sexual activity '
' a participant. This is defined as:
When it includes prostitution
When it includes pornography
When one of the people is in a '
position of authority
' over the other.
While a 16 year old could consent to sex, having photos of a sexual nature of a person under 18 on your phone would be illegal.
The Criminal Code of Canada requires that you go to take '
' to ensure that a sexual partner is giving consent. This means you can't just assume that someone consents.
What would a 'reasonable step' be to ensure that some one is consenting?
Criminal Code and Consent
Subsection 273.1(1) defines consent as the voluntary agreement of the complainant to engage in the sexual activity in question.
Some well intentioned campaigns target young people by telling them that 'consent is sexy'.
Indeed, consent can be sexy.
But consent is more than sexy.
Consent Needs to Be...
Student Counselling Services
Campus Safety Walk
Campus Health Centre
Male Survivor Program, Community Counselling Centre
Sexual Assault Counselling Program, Community Counselling Centre
Amelia Rising Sexual Assault Crisis Centre
SANE Program, North Bay Regional Health Centre
"One or a series of
comments or conduct
of a gender-related or sexual nature that is
might reasonably be known to be
unwelcome/unwanted, offensive, intimidating, hostile, or inappropriate.
Examples include gestures, remarks, jokes, slurs, taunts, innuendos, threats, verbal abuse, unwanted physical contact, invitations, leering, the display of sexually offensive material, solicitation, demands, penalties related to sexual orientation, marital, or family status, unwanted attention..."
Such harassment is prohibited under Nipissing's
Code of Student Rights & Responsibilities
, and is subject to disciplinary process by the university.
In the Canadian Criminal Code, following/watching someone, calling/texting/writing to them repeatedly, can all be considered harassment.
Residence Procedural Expectations
what do I do if a student comes to me and says they have recently been sexually assaulted?
Remember your communication skills
be aware of personal space and body language - physical contact should not be initiated
acknowledge the student's feelings ("I believe you," "how can I help?")
let them to tell their story without any judgement
be comfortable with silence - don't interrupt or feel the need to fill in
use open ended questions - give them the opportunity to talk
Based on conversation, refer student to the appropriate resources
Allow them to decide on the plan moving forward
Let them know that they can call the Police and report
Know Your Limitations
Understand the limits of confidentiality
Tell the student that this information stays confidential and you will not tell any students or other Dons, BUT you must call an RLMT to consult and get further direction.
Make the CALL
Call the RLMT and Consult
explain what happened to the student
recount what you have already told the student
based on information provided, the RLMT will support you with a plan to refer the student and support the student
RLMT will help you with how to refer students to resources
If recent (day of, next day), refer to the hospital SANE program
If it happened in the past, refer to Counseling Services on campus, Community Counseling, and/or Amelia Rising.
If recent and depending on the situation, the RLMT may come in to speak with the student.
If you refer the student and the plan moving forward is approved by the RLMT consult, the RLMT will still meet with the student the next day as follow-up.
ALWAYS REMEMBER EMPOWERMENT!
It is the student's decision on how they want to proceed. They may not want to attend the hospital or go to counseling.
Let them know they will be contacted by the supervisor for a follow-up the next day. The supervisor will continue the support and referral follow-up process.
Write an OCCURRENCE REPORT
Document the conversation
This helps with follow up and any further steps that need to be taken
We Are Here for You!
The RLMT is your support BOTH during and after every situation.
We are professional staff on-call - you aren't bothering us!
What is Our Response to Sexual Harassment?
Comfort the student
Remind the student of their options - they can call the police
If the harassment is a recent occurrence and/or it is dangerous or the student needs further help immediately - call the RLMT on-call for consultation
If the harassment isn't recent or is not in need of an urgent response, follow-up with your RLS the next day, so that the RLS can follow-up with the student.
Write an occurrence report
Alex and Casey have been dating for four months. Alex is interested in having a sexual relationship, but so far Casey is not. One day, feeling frustrated, and undesired, Alex says to Casey “I feel like you never want to have sex with me. Are you even attracted to me? I feel like you don’t even want to be with me! If this is how our relationship is going to be, I’m over it!” This is an example of:
a) sexual harassment
c) sexual assault
Taylor and Avery makeout after they meet at a party at Taylor’s classmate’s house. The next day, Avery sends Taylor a friend request on Facebook. Taylor is shocked to see that Avery’s age is only 15. Since Taylor is 20, is this a problem?
a) No, because they did not have sex, they only kissed.
b) Yes – because Avery is younger than the age of consent.
c) No – because Taylor wasn’t in a position of power over Avery.
Jesse and Quinn met on Tindr, and have been casually dating for three months. Jesse is 17 and Quinn is 19. Jesse and Quinn text each other often, and exchange nude photos on occasion. Since Jesse is over the age of consent, Quinn thinks that this must be ok. Is Quinn right?
a) Yes – if yes, why?
b) No – if no, why?
Bailey and Riley have been dating since grade 11. Bailey goes off to university, while Riley stays in their hometown to attend college. During Thanksgiving break, Bailey ends their relationship. Riley is heartbroken! This relationship was important to Riley, and Bailey ending it suddenly, and without an explanation really hurts. Looking for some understanding and closure, Riley texts Bailey wanting to talk. When Bailey doesn’t reply, Riley tries calling Bailey’s cell phone and residence phone repeatedly. Riley continues calling and texting, over and over, for hours, hoping that Bailey will reply. Bailey feels worried about all of Riley’s contact attempts, and thinks about calling the police.
Is what Riley is doing a crime? Why or why not?
Jordan and Jamie have been on a few dates, and have had sex before. They plan to have sex after a party at Jamie’s house, and text about their plans all day leading up to the party. Both of them drink throughout the evening. By the time the guests go home, Jamie has drank too much, and is falling asleep. Jordan is annoyed, having looked forward to this all day. Since they have a preexisting relationship, and Jamie consented earlier in the day, would it be considered sexual assault if Jordan were to have sexual contact with Jamie?
a) Yes – if yes, why?
b) No - if no, why?
Jordan and Jamie have been on a few dates, and have had sex before. They plan to have sex after a party at Jamie’s house, and text about their plans all day leading up to the party. Both of them drink throughout the evening. By the time the guests go home, Jamie has drank too much, and is falling asleep. Jordan is annoyed, having looked forward to this all day. Since they have a preexisting relationship, and Jamie consented earlier in the day, Jordan decides to attempt sexual intercourse with Jamie. Jamie is resistant and hesitates but Jordan persists.
Jamie goes to see the Don the next day as Jamie can't remember parts of the evening but remembers being uncomfortable and resisting intercourse at the end of the night.
Community Counselling Centre
offers free, confidential counselling to men and women who have experience sexual abuse.
Male Survivor Program
Community Counselling Centre's Male Survivor program is the only free 1-on-1 and group counselling in North Bay for male survivors of sexual abuse.
Male Survivor Program
Male survivors can participate in individual and/or group counselling, and have the option of working with a male or female counsellor.
Anyone can call to refer themselves to this program.
351 McIntyre St. East,
North Bay, ON