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Victorian Etiquette

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Katie Jo Kautsch

on 5 February 2013

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Transcript of Victorian Etiquette

by Katie Jo Kautsch Victorian Etiquette Origins of Etiquette "The Word etiquette came from the French verb, 'estiquer' which means means to 'attach'. It first became 'l'estiquette', describing the list of rules attached to a post in courtyards of castles" Victorians are considered outcasts if they do not follow the rules of society.
Having proper etiquette was a ride of passage into mature adulthood.
There were 60 books and manuals written about etiquette and manners. Victorian Etiquette Basics never speak or act in anger.
put yourself before others.
be patient and gentle.
learn to speak kindly when the opportunity offers Etiquette at Dinner Parties always be on time
whomever you invite must be special.
the dinner should be the best you can afford.
avoid talking about religion or politics.
ladies had to wear gloves to dinner parties
No gentleman escorts two ladies, and relations do not go to dinner in couples; all relationship is lost sight of. Etiquette on the Street bows are only exchanged at the first meeting.
if you're carrying bags, umbrellas, or canes, they should not inconvenience others.
in meeting on a street, a man must make way and the young should make way for the older people.
in the evening or at anytime it may be unsafe for a lady to walk alone, a man must take her arm.
a man cannot smoke in the presence of a lady
a man cannot stand and make remarks on a lady Calling Cards Calling cards were a way of subtle communictation between two people. It could be a way of saying that you're thinking about them or you've visited their home.


The way the card looked could give the receiver a message.


A folded top left corner meant the visitor had come in person; this corner unfolded meant a servant was sent.

A folded bottom left corner signified a farewell

A folded top right corner meant congratulations

A folded bottom right corner expressed condolence. No No's of Victorian Etiquette to stare around a room
to go somewhere when you weren't invited
to look at your watch impatiently
to walk around the room waiting for the hostess
to alter a room to your liking
to make remarks about a person that has left the room SALUTATIONS! thanks for listening

"The world was my oyster but I used the wrong fork."
Oscar Wilde What about the kids? •Never talk back to older people especially your father and mother.
•Never whine or frown when spoken to by your elders.
•Never argue with your elders - they know best
•Never do anything that is forbidden by your elders
•Do as you are told in a pleasant and willing way
•Never contradict anyone in any way it is very impolite
•Always rise into a standing position when visitors arrive
•Never start a conversation with a visitor until they have started to speak
•Never allow your parents to bring you a chair and never allow them to get one for themselves. Wait on them, instead of being waited on.
•Never run up and down the stairs or across the room.
•Keep yourself clean and neat looking at all times.
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