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Copy of The Relationship Bank Account

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by

Lynn Salehi

on 20 August 2013

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Transcript of Copy of The Relationship Bank Account

Relationship Bank Account
Like a bank account, relationships become stronger with deposits and weaker with withdrawals.
6 Types of Deposits
Keep your promises
Do small acts of kindness
Be loyal
Listen
Say you're sorry
Set Clear expectations
What is a Relationship Bank Account?
The relationship bank account is an analogy used by Sean Covey to describe how relationships work.
What types of things do you think count as "deposits" in relationships with
your friends?
your family?
your teachers?
Making and KEEPING a promise is a deposit in the relationship. The other person knows you can be counted on.

In the same way, BREAKING a promise is a withdrawal from the relationship.

Have you ever had someone break a promise to you? What did that do to the way your viewed that relationship?
Small acts of kindness --
Smiling at someone
giving compliments
writing a thank you note
volunteering to help, etc.
are DEPOSITS.

Can you think of someone who is always doing nice things for you?


Loyalty is a relationship deposit.
When you stand up for a friend
you strengthen the bond you have
with them.

When you gossip about a friend
you are withdrawing from
the bank accounts of that friend
AND those who hear you.
Listening is one of the best ways to make deposits in a relationship. When you REALLY listen to someone, especially when they are upset, it shows respect and builds trust.

Have you ever wished that someone (a friend,
parent, teacher) would just take the time
to REALLY LISTEN to what you
had to say?
We all make mistakes, and they can sometimes lead to withdrawals in our RBAs with others.
It takes a lot of courage to stop and tell another person "I made a mistake, I'm sorry."
Apologizing and asking for forgiveness will make deposits in your relationship that overcome the withdrawals.
Sometimes we disappoint people
(or they disappoint us) because we
have not been clear about our expectations. When we communicate CLEARLY we can avoid
withdrawals caused by this disappointment.

Can you think of a time that a
misunderstanding left you or someone you
know feeling disappointed?
What happens at the bank if you make many withdrawals but not very many deposits?
What can you do this school year to make sure you keep your relationship bank accounts full?
Relationship bank accounts are different than real bank accounts in three important ways.
1. You have an account with everyone you meet, whether you want to or not!
2. Deposits slowly disappear
over time, and withdrawals
can "harden."
3. Once you have an account
with someone, you can never
close it. If you meet them years
later, you will still have a
"balance" (positive OR negative).
Full transcript