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Being a coach

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Daniel Pesic

on 1 August 2011

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Transcript of Being a coach

Being a coach Welcome to Being a Coach! Introductions Coach and participants
Being a Coach objectives
Introduction to coaching; definitions and distinctions Essential coaching skills
Foundational coaching attitudes
GROW Coaching Model Being a Coach Wrap Feedback and Personal Action Plans Welcome to Being a Coach A foundational approach to coaching A few words about your coach ”First say to yourself what would you be; and then do what you have to do.” Introducing What is your name, and where do you come from?
How long have you been with the organization?
What is one thing that you can share about yourself that will allow us to know you better (talent, hobby, something unusual, something special)?
If you were to walk away from this workshop feeling you got exactly what you needed from your colleagues and coach, what would it be? 09:00 - 09:30 Opening Exercises, Introductions
09:30 - 10:45 Coaching Definitions
10:45 - 11:00 Break
11:00 - 11:45 Coaching in Definitions cont.
11:45 - 12:30 Coaching skills – Relating,Trust, Listening 12:30 - 13:30 Lunch
13:30 - 13:45 Short warm-up exercise- Listening
13:45 - 14:10 Coaching skills – Questioning
14:10 - 15:00 GROW Coaching Model
15:00 - 15:15 Break
15:15 - 16:30 Real Play 1
16:30 – 16:45 Personal Action Plan
16:15 – 17:00 Learnings of the day Agenda: BAC Day One 09:00 - 09:30 Coaching Perspective
09:30 - 10:30 Coaching Perspective – Group exercise
10:30 - 10:45 Break
10:45 - 11:15 Coaching Beliefs
11:15 - 11:45 Coaching Beliefs – Group exercise
11:45 - 12:15 Coaching Attitudes
12:15 - 13:00 Lunch
13:00 - 14:15 Real Play 2
14:15 - 14:30 Break
14:30 - 15:45 Real Play 2 (cont.)
15:45 - 16:00 Break
16:00 – 16:30 Personal Action Plan
17:30 – 17:00 Learnings of the day, final debrief Agenda: BAC Day Two The Reporters Objective Find out as much as possible about being a coach and doing coaching and about the challenges and benefits of coaching Your Mission Interview others to gather as many different perspectives as possible. Probe! Be prepared to answer questions too.
Interview the other person for three minutes then swap (six minutes per round).
R1: A-B and C-D; R2: A-C and B-D; R3: A-D and B-C Debrief Collate your answers as a team (A, B, C, D) and present a summary of key findings to the group. Questions What are the most important coaching skills? (Key skills and competencies that define coaching)
What are the main characteristics of a good coach? (Key attitudes, behaviours and mind set)
What are the main challenges when coaching team members?
What are the main benefits of coaching in the workplace? R1: A-B and C-D; R2: A-C and B-D; R3: A-D and B-C Coaching: Common Definitions An interactive process that helps people and organizations develop more rapidly and produce more satisfying results….

People set better goals, take more action, make better decisions, and more fully use their natural strengths. “Coaching is unlocking a person’s potential to maximize their own performance. It is helping them to learn rather than teaching them.”
Timothy Gallwey, coach and author Core Elements of Successful Coaching A good COACH emphasizes: two-way communication
trust and mutual respect
relationships
commitment A good COACH: listens carefully
encourages others to seek solutions by asking appropriate questions
challenges
expects success
maintains objectivity Knowledge:
Processes &
leadership principles Motivation
and Attitude:
Win- Win player Interpersonal Skills Successful Coaching: What is required from you as coach…. The ability to relate and create trust
Two-way communication - listening, asking, encouraging
Openness - willingness to share, self-awareness
Personal credibility - appropriate level of knowledge
Objectivity - suspend judgment
Intuition, sensitivity, creativity
A positive attitude - expect success
Adaptability - ability to change your style to fit their needs
Problem resolution - guidance to alternative perspectives What is required from the coachee… An awareness of the need to learn and change
Motivation and willingness to take action
Openness to new ideas and information
Trust in you and your relationship Module 1 Coaching Definitions Developing Others The Expert Presents information
Delivers answers
Influences
Pacifying Coaching Presents information
Delivers answers
Influences
Pacifying Handing over facts Creating insight and knowledge Coaching & Mentoring usually short term focus on the development of a specific competence need has the necessary coaching skills and professional knowledge to support the coachee on the subject matter usually longer term focus on all round general development serves as a role model for company's values mentor is more experienced, has 'been there and done that‘ developmental relationship

bringing out the best in people

creating engagement

performance and career development

creating awareness and responsibility Coaching Mentoring The line between coaching and mentoring is quite vague.
They are both about bringing out the best in people
The skills of a mentor and coach can overlap but they are very different roles.
Being a mentor is about being a role model and established leader with wisdom and experience to pass on.
Being a coach is about applying coaching skills and attitudes in order to help others to learn rather than teaching them. Coaching as a part of daily behavior and leadership
Performance coaching
Coaching for development
Coaching for professional excellence

Improving business success and giving people the wings to fly A coaching process can have several implementation models: To increase commitment and motivation
To improve performance
To develop professional competencies
To transfer knowledge
To support personal development Focused on
individual learning needs: Development areas The PPP Model Private Personal Professional Life coaching Professional coaching Professional Coaching Personal Professional Skills
Professional competencies Personal competencies
Values
Alignment of self-perception
Nurturing potential Module 2 What a coach does Essential Coaching Skills Relating
Trust
Listening
Questioning Relating: Reflective Exercise Relating What is relating?
What happens when two people relate to each other?
What makes some of us more able to relate to people than others? To relate is to establish an association or connection with another person… No matter what, we value the other person Valuing We translate what is said into what is meant Hearing We seek to understand anothers perspective Understanding We have a natural internal reaction Reacting We choose our external response Responding Relating Cycle Trust The essence of coaching is trust and without it there is no foundation for success. Trust: Reflective Exercise Reflect:

A Who do you trust?
B Why do you trust them?

5 minutes: Reflection
10 minutes: Conversation Listening To actively perceive information.
Listening is what happens when we add attention to hearing. There is a distinction between hearing and listening
By intending to actively listen, you can learn to focus on the important elements of a conversation
A person’s ability to hear him or herself is increased when you listen intentionally
Listening is more art than science, you cannot learn to listen but through mindful practice you can greatly improve your skill. How to be a ‘good listener’ Eye-contact
Relaxed posture
Use silence Be Interested ‘Sounds like you did a good job preparing the sales meeting’
Summarize what has been said - pick out the main points Identify the issues It is easy to hear what you expect Think about what you have heard 'So does that mean you and the buyer both want the same outcome?' Test your understanding Be and stay open - suspend judgment Remain neutral / objective Be aware that in non-verbal messages, facial expression, tone of voice and gestures, generally have much more impact than words Notes, noises and non-verbals Different perspective, strong emotions
Fatigue, lack of interest
Desire to talk Barriers to listening: Levels of Listening Switched off, busy doing something else Not listening Already decided the right answer and only asking questions to illicit the required answer Right answer listening Already sure what they are going to say Already know that listening Hearing the words clearly but not catching the inflections, nuances and choice of language Accurate listening Seeing the world through their eyes Point of view listening Listening for choice of words, hearing what they are not saying, listening between lines, hearing emotion and reading body language Active listening Listening beyond the stories and words to what wants to happen through that person. Listening as if they were most interesting person in the world about to say something incredibly important Profound listening Listening: Reflective Exercise Please work together in groups of 3

A Listens profoundly
B Is the focus of the conversation
C Observes and gives feedback

10 min: Conversation
5 min: Feedback
5 min: Group debrief Coaching Questions: Promote exploration and discovery
Gather information
Resolve problems
Clear confusion
Gain co-operation
Clarify instruction
Uncover what is missing Coaching Questions Are: Transparent - no hidden agenda
Respectful
Succinct - clear, direct, easy to understand
Non-judgmental - no veiled criticism or put down Types of Questions Open questions: to get information Example: "How did the meeting go?" or "How do you feel about the new project?"
'What', ’How', and 'Why'
Allow for expression of perceptions - prompt extended, free response
Effective in all coaching situations Closed questions: to get confirmation Example: "Did you prioritize your tasks?"
Short, specific answers ('Yes’, 'No’, ‘Maybe’)
Focus the discussion
Can be followed by an open question for more information
Useful for clarification, getting specifics or reducing emotionality Probes Example: "Is there anything else you can do?” or “What else?"
Guides the individual to reflect more deeply Reflective Questions Example: "It sounds like you feel it went well?"
Summarize and clarify main points
Reflect back the person's view Leading Questions Example: ”How efficient do you feel you were in making the small sale margin last period?”
Handle with care! Multiple Questions Don’t go there Benefits of Well Asked Questions People feel empowered - empowerment is foundational
People see that they are competent and have answers
Slows down automatic thinking and reactive moves
Provokes clear, out-of-box, thinking
Raises awareness, which reveals more options
Can shift current perceptions and behaviour patterns
Takes a person from seeing what’s true to taking action Feedback:
What is it for? Feedback helps define where to focus.

Customer evaluations
Employee engagement surveys
360 It takes two Giving feedback:

If unsolicited, ask permission/offer
Give feedback on observed behavior
Use fact not interpretation
Acknowledge feelings
Be constructive and future-oriented Receiving feedback:

Ask the right person for the right feedback
Be specific
Accept feedback
Be genuinely interested
Express appreciation
Follow through A coaching approach Step 1: What Went Well...
Step 2: Even More Effective When... Feedforward: How does Coaching look and feel? coach GROW
Coaching Model GROW
Flow What are you trying to achieve? Goals: Where are you now? Reality: What are your ideas? Options: What support do you need?
What will you do next? Wrap-up: GROW What is their desired achievement, objective, focus, control, challenge Goals Discover the current situation: what has been done, results, who is involved, show-stoppers, plans to move forward Reality Discover their ideas: how else to tackle issues, what else can be done, other suggestions and different perspectives Options What support do they need from you and who else can offer support, and in what way.
Ask about next steps: how to meet the goals, what to do today to overcome challenges Wrap-up GROW What is their desired achievement, objective, focus, control, challenge Goals Discover the current situation: what has been done, results, who is involved, show-stoppers, plans to move forward Reality Discover their ideas: how else to tackle issues, what else can be done, other suggestions and different perspectives Options What support do they need from you and who else can offer support, and in what way. Wrap-up GROW Summarize shared understanding Listen, ask to obtain more information Give feedback Ask about next steps: how to meet the goals, what to do today to overcome challenges Share your own ideas when appropriate Real Play - 1 Please work together in groups of three (or two) A. Coach Relate: be present and value without judgment
Listen: put own agenda aside, listen for what is really being said
Question: ask questions vs. giving solutions, be curious, explore..
Listen to your intuition
It’s about the person, not the topic B. Coachee Be honest and authentic C. Observer Look for use of basic skills (relating, listening, questioning)
Look for ‘pivotal’ questions and shifts - what is the breakthrough? 90 minutes: Coaching and Observer Feedback
15 minutes: Group Debrief Personal Action Plan Working with your Buddy, reflect on the coaching skills and mindset of a coach and coach each other to identify One area of strength
and
One area of opportunity for growth
20 minutes Use your findings to complete the relevant part of your Personal Action Plan 5 minutes Wrap Day One What is the most valuable thing that you learned today? Day Two Welcome back Module 3 Who we are as a coach.. “Only basic goodness gives life to technique.” Stephen R. Covey This is not a pipe. Exploring Perspective The map is not the territory! Our map of the world is not the world People
Things
Events Human Perception Thoughts
Needs
Wants
Fears
Expectations
Mindsets
Attitudes
Values
Beliefs
Language
Experience
Self-image
Agenda Thoughts
Needs
Wants
Fears
Expectations
Mindsets
Attitudes
Values
Beliefs
Language
Experience
Self-image
Agenda What we perceive depends on the whole.. Aoccdrnig to a rsehearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in what oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny ipmoratent tihng is that the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can still raed it wouthit porbelm. This is bcuseae the hmuan mnid deos not raed ervey lteter on its own, but rhtaer the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig, huh? The Perception Process Select
Focus
Interpret
Explain
Organise information What we call ‘reality’ depends on our perspective..
Reality is a matter of opinion! Perspective
in Coaching coachee coach subject Exercise: Exploring Perspective through GROW Goal - Subject Reality - Current perspective Options - Explore alternative perspectives Wrap-up - Choose best perspective
Anchor new perspective Group Exercise:
Exploring Perspective
through GROW Reflect Think about a current situation, task or challenge or opportunity that you would like to relate to in the different way. Play Divide into pairs and coach each other for 10 minutes around new perspectives on your chosen subject. 5 minutes: Reflection (once only)
10 minute: Each Conversation
15 minutes: Group debrief Coaching Beliefs Introduction to Coaching beliefs Coaching beliefs Beliefs Feelings Behaviors Results The Belief Path Reinforcer Reinforcer Reinforcer Reinforcer Beliefs Feelings Behaviors Results Results Behaviors Feelings Beliefs Current State A Reinforcers I am often tired and worry I may have an ulcer
I often feel down and get easily upset I work overtime consistently, sometimes into the night
I often do not show up for family events
I eat a lot of fast food, don’t exercise and drink diet soda and between five and eight cups of coffee a day I feel out of harmony with my family and feel guilt and sadness about it
I have a pain in my stomach and often have headaches I believe that time with my family must be sacrificed for the sake of work
I believe I can regain my health later in life One of the company values states: “Work/Life balance is key to the success of our associates” but I am proud of the extra hours and everybody else does it!
My boss expects results and often makes requests that really stretch me. I get the recognition I deserve by staying late and working weekends to meet her expectations.
My wife accepts that this is what it’s like when you want to stay ahead and my kids will understand when they are older. Results Behaviors Feelings Beliefs Current State B Reinforcers I am in good health and receive excellent check-ups
I radiate a healthy glow and show up relaxed I know when to take time off from work to take care of myself and be with my family
I eat well
I request support from my colleagues when I choose to be with my family I feel a sense of balance between my personal and professional life
I feel grateful for the support I receive from all circles of influence in my life I believe that time with my family is a priority
I believe that health is the most important element to a successful life One of the company’s values states: “Work/Life balance is key to the success of our associates” and I frequently refer to it
My colleagues support me when I choose to be with my family
My wife and children appreciate me for my work contribution and love the time I spend at home The mechanics of human change If you want better results.. Change your perspective! Beliefs: The Great Debate The Motion:
In any organisation, salaries should be transparent and everyone should know what everyone else is earning! Coaching Questions: FOR
AGAINST A. Individual reflection: 5 minutes
B. Team prep: 10 minutes
C. Debate: 10 minutes

Change sides and repeat steps B.
and C., using new arguments.

Debrief Coaching Attitudes Be authentic
Be understanding
Be positive
Be light
Be expansive Being a Coach vs Doing Coaching “Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens.” 
Kahlil Gibran Real Play 2 Please work together in groups of three (or two) A. Coach Relate: be present and value without judgment
Listen: put own agenda aside, listen for what is really being said
Question: ask questions vs. giving solutions, be curious, explore..
Listen to your intuition
It’s about the person, not the topic B. Coachee Be honest and authentic C. Observer Look for use of basic skills (relating, listening, questioning)
Look for ‘pivotal’ questions and shifts - what is the breakthrough? 90 minutes: Coaching and Observer Feedback
15 minutes: Group Debrief Personal Action Plan *With your coaching buddy, take 10 minutes each to identify 2-3 areas of strength and 2-3 areas of opportunity for growth, and coach around how you can grow as a coach in terms of mindset and/or skills. 20 minutes Group exercise: Use your findings to complete the relevant part of your Personal Action Plan 5 minutes Coach each other for 10 minutes each around implementing actions from your Personal Action Plan in your daily work life 20 minutes Summarize the information that you have gathered in the exercise and complete your final Personal Action Plan 10 minutes Wrap Day Two What was the most valuable thing that you learned today? “A coach is someone who sees how big you are and shows that image to you.” Final Debrief What is the most important outcome of attending this program?
What else did you get?
What will you do differently now?
Full transcript