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Why should we be competent communicators?

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Shannon Welch

on 23 August 2013

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Transcript of Why should we be competent communicators?

What is ethics?
Ethics is the study of morals or the moral decisions one makes in their relationships with others.
Personal and cultural values will show how one constructs their messages and how they will analyze messages given to them.
• You can say what ever you want, but you will not be viewed as a competent speaker if you exhibit unethical or manipulative communication.
Unethical communication threatens quality of communication.
Ethical communication is crucial for development of relationships, responsible thinking, and decision making.

Appropriate Behavior
Because of his inappropriate behavior on Oprah Paramount Pictures ended a long-term relationship with him a year later.
It might be okay and forgivable for a five year old to jump on a couch but not a grown man…
• Communication behavior is appropriate when it meets the demands of:
o the situation
o one’s specific communication partner
o other people present
• Normally your surroundings and situations will help you figure out the expectations of your audience.
• To be a successful communicator you need to develop the ability to determine what is appropriate and what is not in different cultures and situations.
• Behavioral flexibility: Your ability to have a number of behaviors at your disposal and your willingness to use different communication behaviors in different situations.
• If you are used to talking to your best friends about the parties and things you did the night before, you might decide that it is inappropriate to telling your teacher during class or telling your parents during church.

Effective Behavior
The behavior can't just be appropriate, it has to be effective and help meet your goals. But having more than one goal makes it difficult, because the goals begin to compete with each other.
Ex.) Greg wants his wife Ruby to be happy, but he also wants to go to his fantasy football league meeting. She wants him to pain the living room the same day and time of the meeting. He has two goals: 1.) go to his fantasy football meeting, 2.) keep Ruby happy. The two goals are conflicting, it seems like he can't have both.

If one person knows how the other will react, or knows the other communicators goals then they have the advantage.
Ex.) Greg knows Ruby wants the living room painted before her family from Florida arrives to visit her in NC. If that is in two weeks and his meeting is in one week, then Greg could suggest another time. A time where he could paint before her family arrived and not on the same day as his meeting.

Greg is communicating appropriately and effectively, Greg is a competent communicator.
Why should we be competent communicators?
The process that you use to communicate is more important than the outcome of the communication.
• In order to achieve competent communication, we must be more concerned with the process we use in communicating rather than just the outcome.
• While winning and losing still matters, process oriented communication focuses more on what was said and how it was said.
• It is better to try to achieve the goals of both partners communicating, rather than just one.
• Mutual satisfaction is the true measure of success.
• Process oriented communication is mostly important when it comes to long-term relationships.
• For example, Sam may win all the arguments he has with his girlfriend, but over time she may start to view him as stubborn and uncaring and end the relationship. In this situation, even though Sam “won”, in the end the communication process used in the arguments led to the break-up and the outcome became irrelevant.
• The process of communication used mattered more than the outcome of the communication (winning/losing).

E-Mail Etiquette: How NOT to Communicate with Your Professor
Students now have the opportunity to be in contact with the professors via email.
The positive side of this is that students can ask questions outside of class and it makes their professors more accessible.
The negative side of this is that students send emails that are inappropriate to send to a professor and a little out of control.
Your message shouldn’t sound the same as something you would send to a friend.
It should have a proper salutation and signature.
All rules of grammar, spelling, and capitalization apply.
(Also have a clear subject line because teachers may mark it as spam if not)
There are certain things you should share with your friends and certain things you should share with your professor.
Make sure you know who your audience is.
Your emails should not be pushy and should not be in abundance.
Your professor has more important things to do then be checking their email 24/7, so give them an adequate amount of time to answer before you send another one.
Before asking your professor questions use the tools they have given you (ex: syllabus, assignment sheets, notes, etc.) and instead of asking your professor for the notes if you missed class you should ask your classmates first.

Wired for Communication
Proper etiquette in communication through emails to professors is an important skill to know in order to build a stable relationship with your professors. Having this type of relationship with your professors will allow you to be viewed as a mature young adult in their eyes and thus will lead to them being more willing to help you in the class and even possible in the future.
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