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Relationships, Communications, and Public speaking

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Janie Do

on 30 November 2015

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Transcript of Relationships, Communications, and Public speaking

Relationships, Communications, Public speaking and Chapter 5 notes

Types of Relatioinships
Public speaking
Be mindful
Be in a state of active
Stop thinking
Know your materials (Use humor/stories
Practice,pause and BREATHE
Visualize yourself giving your speech
Visualize success
Realize that people want you to succeed
Dont apologize for being nervous
Gain experience (take notes of what went well and what didn't)
Manage your nerves
Chapter 5 notes PGS 150-160
Creating a support system
-Individualistic cultures = “I/me” orientation and independence is highly regarded
-Collectivistic culture= “We/us” orientation and interdependence is high regarded
-Ask for help from your instructors (Use quadrant 2)
-Find professor’s office hours and make appointments
-Find resources(Tutoring, writing centers,
women center,..etc)

PGS 167-174
Interdependence At Work
Over 90 percent of people who work for a living do so in organizations, and the ability to function effectively as a member of a team is usually an imperative of success.
- Few abilities have more impact on your success at work than your ability to interact well with supervisors, peers, subordinates, suppliers, and customers.
- Are you someone who works well with others? Someone who completes assignments and does them well? Attends classes regularly and on time? Is respectful of others? Self-aware? Responsible?
- In college, one way to continue developing effective interdependence is by participating actively in study groups. Learning to work collaboratively now will contribute to your success tomorrow.
- Employ teamwork

Passive listening
Active listening
Passive- aggressive
Describe the desired state
PGS 175-180
The Big Picture: Rehearsal
Learning researchers use Rehearsal for mental efforts to remember something.
There are two kinds of Rehearsal strategies- Elaborative and Rote.

Elaborative Rehearsal
This strategy uses deep processing that strengthens both understanding and remembering.
Focuses on meaning by connecting new knowledge with old knowledge.
Enhances deep and lasting learning.

While Rehearsing and Memorizing study materials
-Review study materials. - Read over materials silently and with great concentration on the meaning.
Recite your study materials. - Reciting is similar to reviewing but is done aloud, as you read aloud from your study materials, add any related information that comes to mind. then look away from your study materials and do your best to say the same information again.
Use Cornell study sheets. - Study the content of a section by using either reviewing or reciting, take notes about the content.
Healthy to depend on others
as an adult you are more dependant
Encourage or allow others to make important life decisions
tends to be a cycle of always saying “ I have to help other people achieve their goals, before i can pursue my own goals.
Doing everything on your own
Allow others to do their own thing and you do yours
You keep in mind “ by working hard, i can get some of what i want all by myself
Avoids expressing thoughts/feelings
Always apologizes
Allows others to take advantages
Feel like they have no control
Not getting what they need
Communication can be abusive
Tries to dominate others
Uses threats and criticism
Quick to anger
Doesn't deal directly w/ own probelms
Appears to have no outward issues while indirectly expressing anger and frustration
feels powerless and ineffective
Get your audience excited
Show how things would improve
How problems can be resolved
Start a study Group
-Make a list of who’s doing what
-Agree on common goals
-Have group rules
-Decide where,how often and what time
you’ll meet
Listen actively
-Listen to understand
-Clear your mind and stay silent
-Ask the person to expand/clarify
-Don’t make assumptions
-Ask questions; “Could you give me an example?” “Tell me more about it”...etc
-Reflect that other person’s thoughts/feelings
-Active listening does not only help you strengthen your bond with friends/family. It helps you learning and understanding new concepts.

Be Assertive
How can you communicate in a style that strengthens relationships, creates better results, and builds strong self-esteem?
The two most common patterns of ineffective communication are placating and blaming. Both perpetuate low self-esteem.
- Victims who placate are dominated by their Inner Critic. They place themselves below others, protecting themselves from the sting of criticism and rejection by saying whatever they think will gain approval.
- Victims who blame are dominated by their Inner Defender. They place themselves above others, protecting themselves from disappointment and failure by making them fully responsible for their problems.

Making Requests
Making effective requests is another demonstration of both assertiveness and high self-esteem. Creators know they can’t reach their goals and dreams alone, so they ask for help. The key to making effective requests is the DAPPS rule. Make your requests Dated, Achievable, Personal, Positive, and Specific.

Victim Request example- “I don’t suppose you’d consider giving me a few more days to complete this research paper?”

Creator Request example- “I’d like to request an extension on my research paper. I promise to hand it in by noon on Thursday. Would that be acceptable?

When you make specific requests, the other person can respond with a clear yes or no. If the answer is no try negotiating:
“If Thursday noon isn’t acceptable to you, could I turn my paper in on Wednesday by 5PM?”

Rote Rehearsal
More about remembering than understanding
There is good news and bad news about Rote Rehearsal
- Good news: Memorized facts and details can be valuable. For example rote rehearsal is probably how you learned the alphabet and multiplication tables.
- Bad news: Mindlessly memorizing information can fool you into thinking you understand something when you don’t. Then you go and take a test feeling prepared only to discover how wrong you were,even if you pass the test. Everything you memorized without understanding will be gone when you need it later on,
- As you rehearse you also generate feedback that allows you to evaluate your learning.
- While examining the following strategies keep in mind the big picture of rehearsing your study materials.

Before Rehearsing and Memorizing Study Materials
Form a study team. - Learning strategies are enhanced by doing them with others. That’s why teaming up with creators can increase the effectiveness of your study time.
Create a distributed study schedule. - distribute your effort by studying two hours each day for ten days before the test
Assemble all study materials. - use different kinds of study materials like, an outline one day, concept maps the next, and flash cards the next.

Test yourself. - Taking a practice test is a great way to evaluate your knowledge, Practice answering questions that you think will be on the real test.
Hold a study team quiz. - Ask study team members to bring questions to a meeting and quiz each other, don’t move on to another question until everyone agrees on an answer and they understand it.
Study with flashcards. - You can use flashcards for a quick review whenever you have a few extra minutes.
Memorize by chunks. - Simply reading something over and over is an ineffective way to memorize it
Memorize with acronyms. - Remembering one word in the acronym cues you to recall all of the other words represented by the individual letters.
Memorize with associations. - When you associate something new with something you already know, the new information is easier to recall.
Memorize with the loci technique. - the technique is a variation of associations. Loci is latin for “places” so with this strategy you associate items you want to memorize with familiar place

After Rehearsing and memorizing study materials
Review, Review,Review. - Repetition strengthens memory.
Teach what you learn. - Explaining a complex idea requires a thorough understanding.

Describe the next steps
Based on Jim Harvey's speech structures
“ I know i can get some of what i want by working alone , but i’ll accomplish more if i give and receive help from others.”
State thoughts/feelings in a dear a respectful manner
Deals with own problems w/out violating or alienating others
Tends to have a healthy high self estem
Feels in control
Doesn't try to control others
Communication Etiquette
Acknowledge communications
Responding a reasonable amount of time
Respect people's time
Call/text if youre more than 5mins late
If you dont think you'll make it,cancel or reschedule
Keep phone calls/texts between 8AM-5PM
Body language
Think whether the communication is necessary
Have manners
Get to the point
Don't use abbreviations
Who are you? (Use your name)
Spelling/grammar counts
Don't get too attached
Make a good impperssion
Be proactive
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