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SHOW, Don't Tell!
Transcript of SHOW, Don't Tell!
: The boy was very sleepy. He went to bed and felt very comfortable.
: The boy's eyes were beginning to feel very heavy, as he fought to stay awake. Every few seconds, his neck would slump over in his desk, and his eyes would close. Half a second later, he would jerk upward and jar himself awake.
For each one, write a version that
, instead of TELLS, what happened...
1. The evil monster was very angry. It killed a lot of people.
2. It was really dark outside, and it was hard for me to see where I was going.
Continue with your stories...
What you should have by the end of class...
= Introduce detectives and crime
= Follow one clue to one suspect
= Find out clue is wrong; find REAL clue
... to be continued
SHOWING = very good
When an author
the reader what happened, he/she DESCRIBES the events, instead of just TELLING about them...
: As Sherlock approached the crime scene, his nostrils were bombarded by the foul stench of blood. His eyes surveyed the area, but he could see very little between all the policemen who were coming and going, slamming car doors and hollering across the street.
TELLING = no good
When an author
the reader what happened, he/she simply writes down what happens...
: Sherlock went to the crime scene. There was a lot of blood. It was also really loud.