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Transcript of Mindsets
Ability to persevere when faced with obstacles and set backs
View effort as the key to reach mastery
Learn from criticism/mistakes
Fixed Mindset vs Growth Mindset
Are you in a fixed mindset or a growth mindset?
Does your mindset influence your child's mindset?
How does your mindset impact your life and family?
You are born with talents or you're not
Give up easily
"Nothing ventured, nothing lost,"
"If at first you don't succeed, you probably don't have the ability,"
If Rome wasn't built in a day, maybe it wasn't meant to be." (pp.9-10)
Do you praise your child for their knowledge & talent?
Although you may think this is a way of boosting their confidence, it has the opposite effect.
Praising your child on their talent or brains makes them doubt themselves when anything goes wrong.
Praising children can add to their stress and pressure to not make mistakes to ensure they won't disappoint you.
Parents should refrain from praise that judges their child's intelligence and talent. Instead they can give praise for work ethics.
Praise studying, practice, persistence, patience
Teach your child to embrace challenges and set backs
Convey the importance of effort, trying your best and not giving up
Let children know that there is always more they can learn
Let children know it is okay to make mistakes. Learn from mistakes.
What kind of Praise is Beneficial for Children?
Ways of Giving Your Children
"I like the way you tried all kinds of strategies on that math problem until you finally got it. You thought of a lot of different ways to do it and found the one that worked!"
"That homework was so long and involved. I really admire the way you concentrated and finished it."
"Everyone learns in a different way. Let's keep trying to find the way that works for you."
"You put so much thought into this essay. It really makes me understand Shakespeare in a new way."
The Problem with
Parents think punishing children is a way of teaching them a lesson. What is this lesson?
The lesson is that if children go against their parents rules they will be punished.
Does this solve the problem? (No)
In the growth mindset, parents teach children ways to think through their issues and choices in order to fix the problem.
"When parents give their children a fixed-mindset ideal, they are asking them to fit the mold of the brilliant, talented child, or be deemed unworthy. There is no room for error. And there is no room for the children's individuality..."
Fixed Mindset Ideals
What you say vs.
What your child hears
Parent: "Look at that drawing. Martha, is he the next Picasso or what?"
Child Hears: I shouldn't try drawing anything hard or they'll see I'm not Picasso.
Parent: "You're so brilliant, you got an A without even studying!"
Child Hears: I'd better quit studying or they won't think I'm brilliant.
Parent: "You learned that so quickly! You're so smart!"
Child Hears: If I don't learn something quickly, I'm not smart.
- Dweck, p. 174
Things to Keep in Mind
"Watch and listen to yourself carefully when your child messes up. Remember that constructive criticism is feedback that helps the child understand how to fix something. It's not feedback that labels or simply excuses the child"
"I suck in Math."
"He's a born loser."
"She's a pea-brain."
"You're a natural genius."
"I'm not good in school because I'm stupid."
- Dweck p. 57, pp. 178-179
Tips on Maintaining a Growth Mindset
Form a concrete plan for opportunities
When setbacks occur make a new plan
When you reach success, remember "What do I have to do to maintain and continue growth?"
- Dweck p. 241
"What can I learn from this?"
"What will I do next time in this situation?"
"Rome wasn't built in a day."
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."
-Dweck, p. 9, p. 241
Changing your mindset will be difficult, but don't give up! Just learn from your setbacks because that's what the growth mindset is all about!
"Parents often set goals their children can work toward. Remember that having innate talent is not a goal. Expanding skills and knowledge is. Pay careful attention to the goals you set for your children.
-Dweck p. 211, 212
"You know, in France, when they're nice to you, you feel like you've passed a test. But in Italy, there is no test" (Dweck, 174).
"Parents and teachers who send fixed-mindset messages are like France, and parents and teachers who send growth-mindset messages are like Italy" (Dweck, 174).
Are you France or Italy?
set high standards and help your child reach those standards
give your child growing room; time and space to become who their meant to be
help your child build growth mindset ideals
-Dweck, p. 192
As a Parent you can...
By: Kacey Denoyelles