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HELL: Kimi-chan and Nae Nae-san Style

Welcome to Hell :D
by

Kimberly brown

on 25 February 2011

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Transcript of HELL: Kimi-chan and Nae Nae-san Style

Circle 1 This is the first circle of Hell...go figure. This place is reserved for those who were....wrathful? Is that a word? It's for angry people, ok? Those sent here are flogged for all eternity. MUAHAHAHA!!! Russell Brand will come here. This Guy Circle 2 This is...you guessed it, circle 2!
Yeah, slothful people come here. I am pretty sure that is a real word...
And we're not talking about people who LOOK like sloths, we're talking about people who ACT like sloths. Just thought we should clear that up... People here are condemned to run forever on an eternal TREADMILL!!! ON SPEED 11!!! (out of 10) This is a lazy person.
To the extreme. Well, we can't really find any lazy famous people to put here. I guess they all work very...hard...and....*cracks up laughing* I'm kidding, loads of famous people are lazy. Man, couldn't say that with a straight face... Circle 3 Yeah we know the drill. Third circle of Hell, reserved for those who were gluttonous in life. These people will be condemned to an eternal famine.
Yeah, they ate loads of food during life, they put on enough pounds to get them through all of eternity, right? Manuel Uribe is coming to this circle of Hell....bet you can't guess why... Circle 4 This circle is reserved for those who have...COMMITTED BOOK BURNING!!!
Heinous, is it not?
(and we're not just putting this here because we read so much, you are destroying culture and imagination when you burn a book. ha! valid reasoning, beat that!) So what famous person is coming here, you ask? Why none other than....Mao Zedong! The punishment? Being burned atop the ashes of the books of which thou hast burned. Muahaha!.....ha! Circle 5 This is reserved for those who are voluntarily ignorant. Ha! We told you being smart would help you one day...but did you listen? No. And now you're in Hell. What now? Boo YA! But being a smart ass won't let you escape Hell, smart asses go to Hell too. These people get stabbed. In the face. For all eternity. Yeah, it doesn't fit the crime all to well...AT FIRST GLANCE! But it does fit...if you look really hard, and squint your eyes, and turn your head 67.8 degrees to the left... and hop on one foot. Know who's going here, celebrity wise?
Paris Hilton. Circle 6 People who go here are THEIVES!!! That's right, they stole stuff...like...merchandice...and other people's spouse's. Um...Kimmi, that's not exactly what we mean... let's just move on... The punishment for stealing stuff is!!!!!!!!........wait for it..... YOU GET TO CARRY THE WEIGHT OF EVERYTHING THAT YOU STOLE FOR ALL ETERNITY!!!! TIMES A HUNDRED! CONGRADULATIONS YOU WON! (sarcasm, in case you couldn't get it) And who goes here; you might be asking yourself. Well, people like Eduardo de Valfierno... yeah, that's spelled right. This guy, the man who stole the Mona Lisa. The people who go to this level are almost the lowest of the low. You know what, it's so close to being the lowest you might as well just call them the lowest of the low. The people that go here commit frowned upon sexual acts. The famous person who goes here is... Henry VIII. Dun Dun DUN!!! Circle 8 Almost there! The people who go here are those vile people who take others lives. That's right, we're talking about murder...as opposed to that guy you dated for two years and then he left you. He just wasted your life, he didn't actually take it. The person who goes here is Jack the Ripper. Even though no one knows who he actually is...he's going here. So HA!...moving on... The punishment for this is being murdered in the way that you murdered, being reincarnated and then murdered again!!!!!!!!!!!!! Take that you evil slime!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Circle 7 Circle 9!! Well you've made it. The lowest of the lowest of the low. This, the ninth and final circle of Hell...reserved for...A COMBINATION OF THREE OR MORE OF THE PREVIOUS SINS!!!!!!! The person we have decided to show you is going here is...HITLER!! Yes, Adolf Hitler. One of the most infamous people in World History. He resides here. The punishment of this level is to endure the punishments of each sin for all eternity, quite possibly at the same time!! The punishment for this level of hell is to be mauled to death by a PLATYPUS!!! And once the person is dead they are resurrected and mauled AGAIN! But, each time they are resurrected, ANOTHER PLATYPUS IS ADDED!!! For all eternity!!!!!!
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