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Conflict Management Skills

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Kyle Bachan

on 5 March 2014

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Transcript of Conflict Management Skills

design by Dóri Sirály for Prezi
Conflict Management Skills
Interpersonal Conflict

(1) an expressed struggle
(2) between atleast two interdependent people
(3) who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, or interference from others
(4) and who are attempting to achieve specific goals
(William Willmot & Joyce Hocker)

Conflict as a Process
Source: Prior Conditions
-Aware of differences. Expectations, perceptions, goals, resources.
Beginning: Frustration Awareness
-Aware differences are problematic.
Middle: Active Conflict
-Conflict becomes active. "expressed"
End: Resolution
-Managing the conlflict
- The follow up
Constructive Conflict
Conflict that helps build new insights and establishes new patterns in a relationship:

-Focuses attention on problems that may have to be solved

-Clarifies what may need to be changed

-Focuses attention on what is important to you and your partner

-Clarifies who you are and what your values are

-Helps earn more about your partner

-Keeps relationships interesting

-Strengthens relationships by increasing your confidence that you can manage disagreements

Destructive Criticism
Conflict that dismantles rather than strengthens relationships
Conflict Triggers
Common causes of interpersonal conflict
-Entitlement and Fairness
Dialectal Tension
Tension arising from a person's need for two things at the same time
Conflict Myths
-Conflict is always a sign of poor interpersonal relationship

-Conflict can always be avoided

-Conflict always occurs because of misunderstandings

-Conflict can always be resolved

Conflict Types
Pseudoconflict: Misunderstandings and miscommunications

Simple Conflict: Ideas, definitions, perceptions, or goals

Expressive Conflict: Quality of the relationship and managing interpersonal tension and hostility

Instrumental Conflict: Centers on achieving a particular goal or task and less on relational issues

Ego Conflict: Conflict in which the original issue is ignored as partners attack each other's self esteem

Conflict and Power
Interpersonal Power: Degree to which a person is able to influence his or her partner
Power Principles
Power Exists in All Relationships

Power derives from the ability to meet a person's needs

Both people in a relationship have some power

Power is circumstantial

Power is negotiated
Dependent Relationship: Relationship in which one partner has a greater need for the other to meet his or her needs.
Legitimate Power:
Power that is based on respect for a persons position

Referent Power:
Power that comes from our attraction to another person, or the charisma a person possesses.

Expert Power:
Power based on a person's knowledge and experience.

Reward Power:
Power based on a person's ability to satisfy our needs

Coercive Power:
Power based on the use of sanctions or punishments to influence others.

Types of Power
Power to Persuade
Compliance Gaining:
Taking persuasive actions to get others to comply with our goals
Power Negotiation
Assess Needs
Identify Power-Based Conflicts
Discuss Power issues Directly
Conflict Management Styles
Conflict Style:
Consistent pattern or approach you use to manage disagreement with others
Conflict management style that involves backing off and trying to side-step conflict

Conflict management style that involves giving in to the demands of others

Conflict management style that stresses winning a conflict at the expense of the other person involved

Conflict management style that attempts to find the middle ground in a conflict

Conflict management style that uses other-oriented strategies to achieve a positive solution for all involved
Demand-Withdrawal Pattern of Conflict Management:
Pattern in which one person makes a demand and the other person avoids conflict by changing the subject or walking
Disinhibition effect
Sending an overly negative online message that personally attacks another person
The loss of inhibitions when interacting with someone online that leads to the tendency to escalate conflict
Conflict Management Skills
Manage your emotions

Be aware that you are becoming angry and emotionally volatile

Seek to understand why you are angry and emotional

Make a conscious decision about whether to express your anger

Select a mutually acceptable time and place to discuss a conflict

Plan your message


Monitor nonverbal messages

Avoid personal attacks, name calling, and emotional overstatement

Take time to establish rapport

Use Self-Talk
Manage Information
Clearly Describe the Conflict-Producing events

"Own" Your Statements by using the "I" Language

Use effective listening skills

Check your understanding of what others say and do

Be empathetic

Manage Goals

Identify your goal and your partners goal

Identify where your goals and your partners goals overlap
Manage the Problem
Define the problem

Analyze the Problem

Determine the Goals

Generate Multiple Solutions

Select the best solutions
"I" Language
Statements that use the word "I" to express how a speaker is feeling
"But" message
Statement using the word "but" that may communicate that whatever you've said prior to |but" is not really true
Self-Image or self respect that you and your partner seek to maintain.
gunny sacking:
dredging up old problems and issues from the past to use against your partner.
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