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Non Violent Communication

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Sarah March

on 31 October 2012

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Transcript of Non Violent Communication

Non Violent
Communication ROSENBERG What is NVC The Center for NVC When and who developed NVC? Vision a world in which...... a mission to make our visions come true by... Based on the crucial role that language and our use of words play in communicating with others.

It teaches us to communicate with other in a way that leads us to give from the heart allowing our natural compassion to show thorough.

The primary purpose of Nonviolent communication is to connect with others in a way that allows giving to take place. Compassionate giving from the heart. 'Even in situations of longstanding conflict or hostility, non violent communication can open new doors to compassionate connection and action'. Nonviolent communication was developed in 1964 by psychologist Dr. Marshall B. Rosenberg. The Center for Nonviolent communication emerged from Dr. Rosenberg’s crusade to find a way to disseminate much needed peacemaking skills. Since the creations of the Center for NVC, training has been provided to over 60 countries across the globe, including Australia. The Center for NVC is a global organization that supports the learning and sharing of NVC, and help people to peacefully resolve their conflicts in either: personal, organizational and political settings. “Violence in any form is a tragic
expression of our unmet needs”. Core Activities Certification program
Intensive trainings
Promote NVC trainings
Sponsoring organization for NVC social change projects
Creating NVC educational materials
Distributions and sale of NVC educational materials Mission Everyone values each other human needs
Every individual embraces self compassion
People joyfully and compassionately contribute to solving each others conflicts • Living Nonviolent communication

• Supporting continuing integrity of NVC embodiment through continuous training and education for NVC trainers and assessors

• Encouraging and enabling the development of social change efforts

• Fostering connection and collaboration among individuals, groups and other organizations that share our vision. Theories that support NVC Theories that support NVC Theories that support NVC The 4 Step Process of NVC Observations Feelings Needs Requests Clearly expressing
how I am without
blaming or criticizing Emphatically receiving how you are without blaming or criticizing Jackal Giraffe Jackal Language Jackal language is part of ourselves that discounts us from our awareness of our feelings and needs and the feelings and needs of others.
Jackal language makes it hard for a person who uses it to get the connection they want with others. Which makes life much less wonderful than it could be.
Tend to use power to punish, reward and make people feel shame and guilty. What language do you use? Giraffe Language Non-violent communication is known as the giraffe language or language of the heart.
Rosenberg picked the giraffe, because it is a land animal with the largest heart as a symbol of NVC.
Giraffe language inspires compassion and joyful relationships in all areas of life.
It stresses on the expression of feelings and needs, NVC invites vulnerability and transforms it into strength.
It requires you always speaking from your heart. Rosenberg uses two animals to describe the two different types of language we use:

THE JACKAL
OR
THE GIRAFFE "Non violent communication requires us to be continually conscious of the beauty within ourselves and other people." A child has got a answers wrong in a test
Jackal & Giraffe Response Jackal

You got that question wrong Giraffe
Hey Buddy, I'm confused about how you got that answer. I get a different one. Could you show me how you got that? Rosenberg and NVC Carl Rogers theory of ‘human emotional growth’

Based on being open to experience, to trust in one’s experiences, to have internal evaluation. Nel Noddings ‘care theory’

Leading scholar on care theory – believes that Care ‘speaks to the existential heart of life'. An emphasis on living together and creating and maintaining positive relations. Human needs theory has been evolving since the mid-20th century. First popularised by Maslow, and the Hierarchy of Needs in 1954. Rosenbergs theory is built upon the belief that every choice that an individual makes in their is made to meet a need.
This is similar to the Choice Theory developed by Glasser. He believes that because all humans have similar needs, the sharing of needs with those around you will create understanding that will lead to a solution that will meet everyone’s needs. Hierarchy of Needs Choice Theory NVC and Education Those who believe in using non-violent communication have a focus on education and what students can get out of school.

Their interest lies mainly in empowering students to value such things as autonomy, independence, peaceful resolutions and ensuring that their own and others needs are being met.

Such a system in schools would promote student wellbeing, something that is neglected in many of our schools. Strengths Education and Schools
• Maximize the individual potential of all students

• Strengthen students’ interest, retention and connection to their work

• Improve safety and trust in your classroom

• Improve classroom teamwork and efficiency and cooperation

• Strengthen classroom and teacher-parent relationships Strengths Personal Relationships
• Deepen your emotional connections

• Transform judgment/criticism into understanding/connection

• Listen so others are really heard

• Get what you want more often without using demands, guilt or shame
• Hear the needs behind whatever anyone does or says In a school, this would look like: Students being motivated in school through their own desire to learn new things.

Teachers work with students in a partnership to set learning objectives that everyone can agree on and work towards.

If the teacher or one of the students feels that one of their needs are not being met, they will approach it positively by considering the feelings and needs of both parties Limitations Training NVC can be self taught - watching online videos by Marshall Rosenberg, or by purchasing one of his books. You can register for training sessions - either weekend sessions or two week training sessions that are run by fulled trained NVC coaches. In Australia most of the training is only available in New South Wales or Queensland. http://www.fullyalive.com.au/PDFs/Nonviolent-Communication-Workshop-Foundation-Training-Nov2012.pdf To find out more about training click below: An upcoming NVC workshop in Sydney would cost $355-$385 just for the session Resources & Costs http://www.nonviolentcommunication.com/aboutnvc/education.htm Scenario Training is costly Educators Package References Jones, S. (2009). Traditional Education or Partnership Education: Which Educational Approach Might Best Prepare Students for the Future. Accessed from: http://www.cnvc.org/sites/cnvc.org/files/NVC_Research_Files/NVC%20in%20Schools/TRADITIONAL_EDUCATION_OR_PARTNERSHIP_EDUCATION_S_Jones.pdf Rosenberg, M. (2003). Non Violent Communication: A language of Life. Puddle Dancer Press Book: United States. Beck, S.R. (2005). Developing Nonviolent Communication: An Integral Approach. Department of Educational Psychology and Leadership Studies: University of Victoria. Puddle Dancer Press (2012). The Basics of Nonviolent Communication (NVC). Accessed from: http://www.nonviolentcommunication.com/aboutnvc/aboutnvc.htm What some people have said about NVC Young people rarely have the skills to say what they mean in a challenging situation. NVC has given me ways of hearing in a way I would like to have been heard by my teachers at school. I am much more able to listen person to person now, not as a teacher." Brown, M. (2002). Are you a jackal or a giraffe? TES Newspaper. Article accessed from: http://www.tes.co.uk/article.aspx?storycode=371938 Conclusion Non Violent Communication allows us to solve conflicts with more ease, and teaches us to ask for what we want without demanding it. NVC can help us to hear the true needs of others, and strengthen our personal and professional relationships. NVC in education allows us as teachers to get students to open up and express how they are feeling about the educational process, and help them address their personal and educational needs. "It brings a more loving, compassionate, and nonviolent way of understanding and functioning with others. "NVC shows us how to listen emphatically and also communicate our authentic feelings and needs. NVC connects soul to soul, creating a lot of healing". Most people aren't used to talking about their feelings and needs Difficult as a whole school approach Not well recognised in Australia as yet

There are only a few partnership-oriented schools in existence at this time.

Many teachers around the world are, however, using partnership approaches (including NVC) with their own students in their own classrooms.

In schools where NVC has been used, students often go through a few phases before they accept this model and use it in their everyday interactions with others. NVC in Schools Continuum of Classroom Approaches Autocratic Authoritarian Authoritative/
Democratic Liberal Laissez-faire Nonviolent
Communication Porter, L. (2000). Student Behaviour: theory and practice for teachers. McPherson's Printing Group: Victoria. Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is based on the principles of nonviolence ->"The natural state of compassion when no violence is present in the heart". "His Child putting Giraffe ears on". Cost of resources
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