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Transcript of Disagreeing Respectfully
How many times did you hear "What it would feel like to be them?"
Imagine that your family is trying to decide what to do for a family activity.
Pretend you have a little sister, and her idea is for all of you to help her make clothes for her dolls.
When people treat each other disrespectfully, is it easier or harder to come to an agreement?
Today we are going to talk about how to express your perspective in a respectful way, especially when there is a disagreement.
Now let's say your parents want you and your sister to agree on what to do.
You might not think that making clothes is a good idea, and that's fine, but what do you think will happen if you use some of these words...
We're going to watch a video about Nick and Shereen.
Their class does not use second step lessons like we do.
Write down one word that describes your opinion of that activity.
Do you think these words are respectful?
Watch how they handle it, and listen carefully for blaming language.
Nick and Shereen did not treat each other very respectfully.
How did their voices sound?
Nick and Shereen used blaming language.
THINK of an example of when they blamed each other.
TURN and TELL your partner.
Whenever you make a statement that starts with "you always..." or "you never..." you are speaking in a way that blames the other person.
How do you think people feel when they are being blamed?
Did it seem as though Nick and Shereen were listening to each other?
How could you tell?
Does it seem likely that Nick and Shereen are going to find a solution that works for both of them?
Let's watch another disagreement.
This time, we will be watching two students who HAVE had SecondStep lessons.
Listen carefully for what they are disagreeing about.
In this scene, Antonio and Sierra also disagreed.
What were they disagreeing about?
What did they do to handle their disagreement differently than Nick and Shereen did?
Antonio and Sierra were able to communicate their perspectives about the situation in a respectful way.
When you can be ASSERTIVE -- which, remember, is about being clear, firm, and respectful -- people are more likely to listen to your perspective.
Another part of respectful disagreement is listening with attention.
THINK about how you could tell that Antonio and Sierra were listening with attention to each other.
TURN and TELL your partner.
When you acknowledge someone else's perspective, even if you don't agree with it, it shows that you are being RESPECTFUL.
Let's do some skill practice!