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On Belonging

Surpassing the Gendered Dynamics of the Impostor Syndrome

Academic Authenticity

The Impostor Syndrome

The Impostor Syndrome in Layers

Layers...

'Allowing'

your highest potential

  • Different/differential
  • Holy and safe space
  • Little blue notebook
  • 'Social scripts' for people identifying as women
  • Aftercare: sign-up for e-mails

In touch with yourself

Loving your life

PhD in History IISH/Utrecht University: gender, sexuality, criminal law

2 Postdocs: NIOD and Willem Pompe Instituut Utrecht University

Negotiating for a 3rd currently

Research and teaching theme: 'Boundaries' | who invents them, who guards them, who tests them, who challenges them

and with what kinds of words?

Research methods: relational realism, discourse analysis, qualitative and quantitative data

Individual Coaching:

slowing down to catch up with yourself

Dr Anna Tijsseling

About Anna

Academic Authenticity

Workshops, Lectures, Courses:

raising awareness and re-membering the academy

Blog: Feel the fear and do it anyway

Authenticity Circles: carving out your niche; kindred spirits

1. Why?

History

  • 1978ff: term coined by Prof. Dr Pauline Clance and Dr Suzanne Imes

  • Initially thought of a syndrome that only applied to women
  • Later studies show that both women and men suffer from Impostor Syndrome feelings

  • Still: impact of syndrome, generally speaking, different for women and men, primarily because men are raised to be comfortable competing with each other and women are raised to attend to the maintenance of their relationships (harmony)
  • Causes (upbringing, cultural patterns of expectation and your body)
  • Consequences
  • Action plan

Vreneli Stadelmaier

The Impostor Syndrome is the feeling that you do not belong in the position you are in because you are convinced you lack the competences which are required.

Rationally, you know you fit the bill, but you can't help feeling like an impostor nonetheless. You are afraid to be found out.

Anxieties concerning:

  • 'failure' (i.e. proving that sth doesn't work...)
  • not meeting expectations
  • being disliked
  • not being accepted
  • to peer with your prior successes

Attributing success to external factores (luck, the weather).

Attributing failure to yourself (as if you are omnipotent).

Two responses:

  • working too hard
  • setting the bar too low

What is the Impostor Syndrome exactly?

Why does it make sense to address audiences of female professionals?

Need to know

Awareness for both men and women are essential, actually. But since women are more prone to suffer from this syndrome, it is valuable to be able to address this issue in a group of people who identify as women.

So... what's up with gender? To enlist some important aspects:

  • we value men as superior and women as inferior (i.e. it does not take a man to find women inferior... e.g. marking papers and exams... why 'blind marking' matters...) (LGBTQI's are just as heteronormative as heterosexuals, racism is alive in all of us). These are deeply ingrained cultural 'worldviews', we were raised in them, they are in our fibre. Be(com)ing aware of it matters.

  • women are raised to engage in and sustain relationships; men are raised to be comfortable with competition: this affects the way in which we work, e.g. give feedback and receive feedback.

  • heterosexual women are caught in a double bind: they want to develop themselves and reach their highest potential, but they also want to be seen 'as attractive' to the opposite sex which requires them to tone down their talents and skills .

Sarah Cooper (2018) How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men’s Feelings. Kansas City, MO: Andrews McMeel Publishing.

'I am

over the moon

that you are here'

Moon Assignment

5 times...

Devaluing you/ me

Feeling validated

Internal dialogue

'Answers'

'Gosh.. I feel that I can unwind a little, knowing that I am welcome'

'I can sense my breathing becoming slower and deeper. This is relaxing.'

'Gosh, she is phoney...'

'Srsly... You feel the need to address me like that?'

'She can't know if I am wonderful...'

'If she knew who I really am she would not say this so generally

Alert!

This assignment is not about 'right' or 'wrong'.

It is about observing without judging (or not judging the judging).

Slowing down to catch up with yourself

Third option = 'tapping into your 'I'':

'How do I feel about my being here?'

'What do I feel about her being here?'

2. How?

3. What?

On Congruency

From my training 'Authenticity on the Workfloor. The Basics':

Authenticity matters in your daily life. It leads to feeling relaxed, experiencing joy and to an open and adventurous outlook on the world (and your research).

A lack of authenticity harms us because we run the risk of burn-out, being out of touch with ourselves, and the risk of not operating congruently with our core values and deep beliefs.

We all 'know' incongruency. We have all said 'yes' when we felt 'no'.

Why? Incongruency shelters us from having to address our deeply uncomfortable fears.

  • We may fear not being liked.
  • We may fear our temporary contracts not being renewed if we work congruently.

If these are the reasons for behaving incongruently, we at least do not have to face those uncomfortable fears. We don't have to judge ourselves for it, but be(com)ing aware of it matters.

Congruency Assignment

Rembember a recent situation in which you said 'yes' and felt 'no'.

This could be a very insignificant 'yes' to a not that important 'no'. It could also be a profound experience of incongruency.

Choose whatever you want to contemplate right now: you are safe, your notes are for your eyes only.

The only thing that is important: be raw and honest with yourself.

Three questions:

1. What was the situation at hand?

2. What made you say 'yes'? Which 'fear' did this 'yes' relate to?

3. What would you say to yourself now about this recent experience of saying 'yes' when you felt 'no'? What would you have needed hear to be able to feel and say 'no' in that situation?

Back 2 the world...

  • Take care of yourself
  • Do not use this lecture as a legitimation of judging yourself for incongruent behavior.
  • Be aware of yourself.
  • Be aware of the needs alive in you. Take note. Take care.
  • Be(come) a leader in creating a nurturing academic environment (even more).
  • Do not laugh when you feel a joke is not funny.
  • You are here and you are real.

Back 2

the world

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