HOW
WHY
WHEn
PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT & LEADERSHIP (PDL)
Muhammad Abdallah 2018®
WHY PDL?
- Do you find yourself frustrated feeling that your life is just going by without any strong sense, purpose & direction and you’re just going with the flow?
- Do you wish you had more time to do the things that really matter most to you?
- Do you feel you are living another persons dream for you and not your own?
- Are you very critical of yourself?
- Are you really good at something and yet are not able to maximise your talent?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, then it is my hope that you will benefit from this course.
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The 9 Habits if incorporated, will bring positive changes to our lives.
PDL
- Personal development & Leadership (PDL) is the improvement of oneself in all aspects of one’s life.
- In short, the full use and exploitation of your talents, capacities, potentialities and the like.
WHAT
Allah does not change the condition (blessings) of a people until they change (what is within) themselves
(Surah Ar-Ra’d, 13:11)
THE CHINESE BAMBOO TREE
9 HABITS FOR PDL
IQ
There are 6 Foundations to the 9 Habits
1st Foundation: habits
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What are Habits?
- Habits are established patterns of thinking…
Types of Habits:
Some habits are good...some habits are bad...some are harmless
Depending on what they are, our habits will either make us, or break us.
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The Prophet (saw) said, “the deeds loved the most by Allah are those done regularly even if they are small”
(Sahih Bukhari, Sahih Muslim)
2nd foundation: Appreciating Paradigm Shifts
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What is a Paradigm? (para-dime)
Paradigms are like glasses.
That wrong lens affects …
You say don’t have time for important things, you won’t.
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Believe you will fail…
Tell yourself you're stupid or dumb growing up, look for evidence to support that belief, find it, and you’ll become/act dumb.
Tell yourself you're smart, you will act smart, read a lot, listen well and be smart.
We need to look closely at how we see ourselves, others and life in general. We might be wearing the wrong prescription.
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The self-empowering field of Personal Development, allows you to get the correct prescription.
To have a Paradigm shift is very important to personal development and interpersonal development.
Story of Lady at airport
We should open our minds and hearts to new information, ideas, and points of view and be willing to change our paradigms when it becomes clear we are wrong.
3. Focus on Production Capability and not just on Production
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Consistent effectiveness depends on capability to keep improving, to get your desired result, over and over again.
A paradigm shift is required from a focus on output and efficient productivity to total habit-reform in order to achieve lasting success.
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4. Doing Good/Bad to Others (Emotional Bank Accounts)
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Positive feelings in people are built up when good is done to them, when they are made to feel important, respected and appreciated.
The more good, the more emotional investments in emotional accounts. When bad actions or neglect is done, even if not deliberate, emotional withdrawals are made from their account.
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“This heart has been created in such a way that it loves those who show kindness towards it, and dislikes whoever hurts it.” (Hadith by Baihaqi)
“Do not dismiss certain acts of kindness by deeming them to be insignificant, even if (it is that) you meet your brother with a smiling face” (Agreed upon).
“Repel (wrong-doing) with that which is better, then verily, he between whom and you there was animosity (will become) as though a close friend” (Suratul Fussilat, 41:34).
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A closer look at : Investments/deposits and withdrawals
- Examples of deposits...largest deposits...priceless words
- Examples of withdrawals...largest withdrawals...costly words
Deposits must be in correct currency
5. Sphere of Influence and Sphere of Concern
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We have a wide range of concerns: Health, weather, problems at work, class control, national crises, the depletion of the ozone layer, family problems, money etc.
Events and circumstances are divided into those that are within:
- Sphere of Influence –
- Sphere of Concern
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SOI - Things that you can do something about.
What are your choices?: Student rude to cleaner...Litter...Improper dressing...Noise in another class
Do something if you can
The fact is, we have no real control over some things that happen to us.
(power point)
SOC - areas you feel you have no control over, but are nonetheless concerned about.
“…And whatever any soul does, reaps its own consequences unto itself, and no bearer of burdens shall bear the burden of another” (Surah Al-An’aam, 6:164)
Allah does not hold you accountable for anything other than your SOI
‘Most of us are anxious to improve our circumstances, but are unwilling to improve ourselves – and we therefore remain bound.’
Expanding your sphere of influence
Inside-out approach to personal development and social change
A common saying goes, “if for fear of failure you fail to try, you have automatically failed.”
6. Maturity develops in Stages – Evolution through self-renewal.
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- To achieve P.D.through good habits one needs to appreciate the role of gradualism and maturity
- P.D. is a process that unfolds itself step-by-step.
- Like a great building put together with cement, sand, stones, gravel, wood, metal, etc to make a great monument that lasts centuries.
- However, this building cannot be strong unless each part achieves its own internal strength.
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Natural order of maturity in the world
Frog principle
- Do it regularly, even if not a habit, it will stick.
- Get in the habit of making good habits
NOW THE HABITS...
IDEAS
HABIT 4: PRIORITIzE, AND PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST
- Why do we wait for disaster or crisis in our lives?
- Neglect relationship with God till trouble comes.
- Keep breaking rules till query #2
- Neglect our body till disease (diabetes, obesity, High BP, etc)
There isn’t enough time for everything in life, but there certainly is enough time for the most important things.
5 Life Dimensions that our 1st things or priorities should revolve around.
- Spiritual dimension,
- Physical/health,
- Mental/educational,
- Social/emotional,
- Professional/service/Financial
Brutal and ruthless treatment of distractions: T.V. Internet, Friends just chatting
Do what you hate first, (eat that frog) or if not doing it, able to still get it done, through negotiation, change, delegation, think proactively, etc
“Take advantage of some five (things) before some five (others): your Life before your Death; your Good Health before your Ill-Health; your Free Time before your Pre-occupation; your Youth before your Old-Age; your Wealth before your Poverty” (Al-Haakim, Al-Baihaqi).
When you have scheduled your 1st things, it’s easier for you to have peace of mind and a sense of control and balance in your life because you know you have remembered and included all your important commitments.
Compass before Clock (direction before speed)
HABIT 5: HAVE DISCIPLINE AND SELF-CONTROL
Your time is your life and your life is your capital; it is the basis of your reward (ultimately...Jannah)
HABIT 6: THINK WIN/WIN, THINK LOVE FOR OTHERS.
This is the habit of mutual benefit and respect.
Habit of paradigm of abundance (there is plenty for everyone.)
The opposite of this habit is a concern with hierarchy, and a paradigm of scarcity – where one perceives that there isn’t enough to go round, they are threatened by others’ success or strengths, and an anxiety of competition.
The qualities needed to be developed to engage in this habit are: trust, cooperation, consideration and courage, patience.
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Comparing oneself assumes that all parties have a similar standard.
Aim for your own higher standard than someone else’s norms. Don’t lower your standards because someone else has.
Be the mature one, exercise self control, press pause, be proactive, set a plan of what you want to achieve, stay focused, think win-win.
“None of you has attained to faith until you love for your brother what you love for yourself” (Sahih Al-Bukhari, Sahih Muslim).
"I won’t step on you, but I won’t be stepped on either"
You care about others and want them to succeed, but you also care about yourself, and want to succeed as well.
It’s all about US.
"You cannot have
a positive life and
a negative mind."
- Joyce Meyer