The Genderlect Theory

Men and women communicate in different ways

Women:

Seek Intimacy and Connection

Men:

Seek Status and Independence

Men in the genderlect theory

• Emotion is commonly viewed as a weakness when building relationships.
• Seek status when resolving issues or communicating amongst others.
• Talk most in public forums.
• Often display self as, "Hero", or "Intellectuals." when telling stories.
• Often initiate conflict and use it as a, 'Short-Cut" for status.

woMen in the genderlect theory

• Emotion is one of their greatest strengths when building relationships
• Seek connection when resolving issues or communicating with others.
• Talk more privately, and are more comfortable in intimate settings to discuss topics.
• Often display self as a victim, and refer to themselves as such in stories.
• Avoid conflict when neccesary and are more likely to comply in conflict.

Gender is a culture

Being apart of a gender has shown us that there are certain norms to each one, and is stated, "Male to Female conversation is cross cultural communication."

As humans we discover both knowingly and unknowingly adapt to what we believe to be and are believed to be Norms for our genders.

Being apart of an opposite sex can make it difficult to understand the other, and not being introduced to the to their thought process early enough can make it more difficult to communicate interpersonally.

"The Difference Between Men and Women"

In the short clip, it is shown how Women, "have a deep drive to seek connection." (Tannen, 2001) The fellow females in the room too show they seek the connecting sides of the story, intimate details that make you feel content and connected to one another.

Ross however, the man is shown to, "have a deep drive to seek status". (Tannen, 2001) With much less detailed insight on the kiss he shared, viewing it more as an accomplishment then an act of intimacy. The other men only seeked to know if there was, "Tongue." which in society is a much more intimate act then just regular kissing,

Listening differences in the genderlect theory

In the short clip titled, "It's Not About The Nail." Men are defined in a similar way to Deborah Tannen's Genderlect Theory, and Women are defined the same.

Men feel at many given times when listening to a conflict in someone's life that they must, "Interupt ot demonstrate status." When most women listen for empathetic reasons to connect and feel like they want to connect with someone who they are listening too.

Listening differences in the genderlect theory cont.

• Men often feel obligated to be the hero when listening, and

make their insight on a situation appear problem solving or like

interrupting with a soluion, rather than being empathetic and

connecting is what people, especially women in their lives want.

• Women on the other hand, do not interrupt to demonstrate status,

and like men are according to the genderlect theory, jump from topic to topic to have a upper hand in conflicts.

• "Women will allow for a conversation to go on for a long time in order to achieve greater relationship depth." (Tannen, 2001)

This may be why some people feel stronger connections to their mothers when growing up, seeing as they appeal to a sensitive side, while Fathers are more problem solving and status seeking.