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Conflict Management: Interpersonal Communication
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Conflict Management
Presented by Lissa Knudsen
Central New Mexico Community College
Conflict
Conflict
What is interpersonal conflict?
What is conflict?
An expressed struggle between two interdependent parties, who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and/or interference from others in achieving their goals.
Interpersonal conflict is enacted through joint communication
Communication
Hocker and Wilmot (2017) list 3 ways communication is tied to interpersonal conflict:
1) Communication can create conflict
2) Communication can reflect conflict
3) Communication is the means through which people manage conflict productively or destructively
Interdependence is the degree to which people are connected to each other in meaningful ways.
Interdependence
Some level of interdependence is required in order for there to be conflict
Conflict can occur when two or more people perceive their goals to be incompatible.
Goals & Resources
Resources are valued tangible and intangible commodities including money, time, effort, love, status, and respect.
When is conflict needed?
When is it needed?
- To create new ideas
- To address problems
- To energize the people involved
- To focus efforts on the most important issues
- To inspire people to act as their most authentic selves
- To help people recognize and benefit from their differences
- To clarify people's needs and preferred communication styles
- To come to resolution, through which trust is gained
- To create boundaries
- To prevent future conflicts
When is conflict harmful?
- When it hampers productivity
- When it lowers team morale
- When it wastes resources
- When is causes more conflict
- When it inspires people to behave inappropriately
- When it grows into threats
- When it causes retaliation
When is it harmful?
APD Detective Ben Melendrez
Crisis Intervention Team
Guest Speaker
Ben has served with the Albuquerque Police Department since 2003 and is currently assigned as a detective in the Crisis Intervention Unit. He has spoken on the topics of conflict management, deescalation, and mental health at several national conferences and works closely with the Behavioral Sciences unit at APD.
Before becoming a detective Melendrez served 14 years as a uniform police officer. Prior to joining the police department Ben served in the U.S. military.
Conflict Types
Self Assessment
Competing/Dominating
Competitive Fighting
If you scored high:
- Depending on your work environment, you may be surrounded by "yes men"
- If so this is because they have learned it is unwise to disagree with you, or have given up trying to influence you
- This closes you off from information
- Are subordinates afraid to admit ignorance or uncertainties?
If you scored low:
If you scored low
- Do you often feel powerless in situations?
- Do you have trouble taking a stand, even when you see a need?
- Sometimes our concerns for others feelings or our anxiety about the assertion of our power can cause us to vacillate or postpone a decision, which may add to the suffering or resentment of others.
Compromising
If you scored high:
- Do you concentrate so heavily upon practicalities and tactics of compromise that you sometimes lose sight of larger issues (eg principles, values, long term objectives, overall welfare of the group)?
- Does an emphasis on bargaining and trading create a cynical atmosphere of gamesmanship?
If you scored low:
If you scored low
- Do you find yourself too sensitive or embarrassed to to be effective in bargaining situations?
- Do you find it hard to make concessions?
Collaborating/Integrating
Collaborating
If you scored high:
- You may have a tendency to discuss issues in depth, even when they don't need it.
- Do you find others taking advantage of your trust and openness?
If you scored low:
- Is it hard for you to see differences as opportunities for joint gain?
- Are subordinates uncommitted to your decisions and policies?
If you scored low
Indirect Fighting
Passive aggressive
Shows displeasure
Communication is indirect leaving fewer options for talking
Avoiding
If you scored high:
- Does your coordination suffer because people have trouble getting information from you?
- Does it often feel as if people are "walking on egg shells" around you?
- Are some important decisions made by default?
If you scored low:
If you scored low
- Do you find yourself hurting peoples' feelings or stirring up hostilities?
- Do you often feel harried or overwhelmed by a number of issues?
Accommodating/Obliging
Yielding or Accommodating
If you scored high:
- Do you feel that your own ideas or concerns are not getting the attention they deserve?
- Is discipline lax?
If you scored low:
If you scored low
- Do you have trouble building goodwill with others?
- Do others often seem to regard you as unreasonable?
- Do you have trouble admitting when you are wrong?