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Transcript

Elevator Pitch

By Maya Burgos

In The Dream House

My Memoir

Carmen Machado published her memoir, In The Dream House, in 2019. This piece follows her through parts of her childhood up until what is almost present day. She brings her readers through a very emotional journey where she faced the abuse of her pastor and her ex girlfriend.

Tone

“The bedroom: don’t go in there” (Machado 17).

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In the beginning of the book, Machado describes the house. It is a 2 bedroom and one bathroom home. She describes in detail about the rooms, the front door, the house from a street view, etc. But after going into depth about the entire house, the last room unspoken about is the bedroom she shared with her girlfriend. This quote definitely uses tone to convey a very dark and lonely feeling. Going into the memoir, I know that Machado is a domestic abuse survivor, but it has yet to go into detail. This piece of text she leaves at the end of the chapter Dream House as Memory Palace shows she suffered a long time behind closed doors. Her bedroom reminds her of the most unsafe place to be.

“The process of growing legs is as painful as knives slicing open her tail. She dances beautifully because every time she steps, she is still in agony. Still, the prince does not pick her” (Machado 36).

Metaphor

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When Carmen speaks of her childhood, it is typically in a negative way. She was sexually abused at a very young age and had a broken self confidence throughout her teen years. She compares herself to the little mermaid. The pain the little mermaid caused herself to grow legs for the prince was gut wrenching. She suffered the trauma as well as sacrifice her voice for the prince, yet she went unnoticed by him. All she had done for him was for nothing. The mermaid symbolizes Carmen in her early years. She had been sexually assaulted by her married pastor many times. She never understood why he did not love her back and why he stayed with his wife. She thought what they had was love, but her pastor was just taking advantage of her. This caused her to never feel worthy, just like the little mermaid, who always went unknown by the prince, despite how much she sacrificed for him.

Pathos

“‘I'm so sorry,’ she says. ‘I didn’t mean it. You know I love you, right?’” (Machado 57).

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Earlier, when Carmen was reading at the kitchen table of her girlfriends parents house, her girlfriend, for the first time, grabbed Carmen by her arm and with a grip so tight she almost shed a tear. Her girlfriend did this to control the conversation Carmen was having with her mom, to make sure she thought about what she was saying before she speaks. Later on the beach, Carmen confronts her girlfriend about what had happened, saying that was the first time she had ever touched her in a way not filled with love. Her girlfriend then uses pathos to reassure her how much she loves her and how she would never mean to hurt her, which Carmen then forgives her.

Purpose

Purpose

The purpose of this memoir is to speak your mind honestly. Throughout the memoir, both of her abusers go unnamed. Machado believes by naming them, they would feel the need to justify what happened. But her memoir is not about their story. In fact, she states it is not even about hers. She wants her audience to focus on why it’s important to tell certain stories and give certain stories space to exist. By sharing with the world personal experiences, it creates a more comfortable environment for others to do the same. Machado wants to give courage to those who want to speak up to do so.

"She strips down to nothing and stands there covered in goose bumps. 'I don't want to be like him,' she says, 'but sometimes I worry that I am'" (Machado 58).

Cause/Effect

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While visiting Carmen's girlfriend's parents house, Carmen witnessed an argument between her girlfriend's parents that seemed to be getting ugly, but was definitely not something unusual for their house. It had almost seemed like a normal night in their household. Carmen's girlfriend told her that she hopes she never becomes like her father, specifically the way that he treats her mom, but fears she already has. This demonstrates cause and effect because she watched her father abuse her mother growing up, which influences her to do the same thing later on in her life to her girlfriend. Growing up in a toxic house as a child effects her behavior in relationships in her life down the line.

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