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Building Children's Brains using Emotion Coaching - school presentation

An introductory workshop on Emotion Coaching
by

karen leafe

on 2 September 2016

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Transcript of Building Children's Brains using Emotion Coaching - school presentation

"Building Children's Brains"
using Emotion Coaching

What is emotion coaching?

where does it fit in school?

At it's heart, Emotion Coaching is about strengthening human "relationships" and connection. It sits very comfortably and complements; SEAL/ELSA/Thrive/Attachment Friendly Schools

Richard Reddington (Conscious Parenting,Somerset)
Dan Hughes (PACE model/Attachment)
Dr Dan Siegel (Neuro-science/Flipping your lid)
"Children do well if they can"
A child might well be behaving in unhealthy ways that have helped them to cope/survive

Attachment Aware Schools
It requires us to pay attention to a child's communication and their emotions, without value judging it
The essence of emotion coaching
starts
with an ability to put our own agenda to one side (often challenging) and put ourselves in someone else's shoes.












We seek to see the world through another person's eyes, with compassion and empathy. Helping them to to feel ok, understood and not alone
Lets begin with the busy school environment, what are the pressures and stresses that you face on a regular basis?
Evidence based practice in schools using Emotion Coaching has evidenced;

a significant decrease in school internal and exclusions
reduced emotional and behavioural challenges for children of all ages
children/young people able to engage more effectively in learning
What we know about
attachment


Children thrive & learn effectively in an environment of high empathy/compassion and high guidance/structure.

Younger children need lots of structure and teenagers need less and more working in collaboration


why do some children find daily routines, rules, relationships and/or learning etc ... a challenge?

"Flipping you lid" a scientific explanation
Neuroscience
"flipping your lid"

Our emotional brain (downstairs)looses connection with the upstairs brain (frontal cortex) when we feel under threat (real or perceived). Often described as fight, flight, freeze response.

For some children the ability to regulate their emotions is a real challenge

"Name it to tame it"

Emotion Coaching appeals to and engages the upstairs brain. "Emotional arousal" can be soothed and calmed simply by naming emotions
Communication interpretation is over 70% non verbal (voice tone, body language, facial expression, eyes, muscle tone)

How we can help
with Emotion
Coaching?
Five steps of Emotion Coaching
1
Tune in

notice
2
Connect
say what you see
3
Accept & listen
3
Accept & listen
with compassion
& empathy
4
Reflect
"
name it to tame it
"
5
Problem solving
redirect
limit setting
choice
safety, security and emotional regulation through healthy "attachment" relationships
These patterns of behaviour meet their psychological & physiological needs
Lagging social & emotional skills
Dr Ross Green
Dr Ross Green

Create some space, between thoughts and actions . Press the pause button ......
Why is it relevant to school?
"emotions drive behaviours"
Key Emotion Coaching messages
Our brains "flip their lids" when we feel or perceive a psychological threat (think - being under pressure; tests/exams, having to perform, public speaking, job interview etc..)
Some children feel under threat and they do not YET have the social & Emotional skills to regulate their emotions effectively
Emotion regulation forms in early attachment and it can change/develop
Connect, pause... before you correct
Name it (emotion) to tame it (calm it down)
All emotions are acceptable but not all behaviours are
You can't emotion coach when YOUR lid is flipped
When a child "flips their lid" the up and downstairs brain can't physically connect
Children learn when their lids are closed and they can access the upstairs (frontal cortex) part of their brain
Behaviour is a form of communication"
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
References
Dan Siegel and Tina Bryson Payne; No Drama Discipline (2015)

Dr Janet Rose Bath Spa University www.attachmentawareschools.com
Rose, J., Gilbert, L., McGuire-Snieckus, R. (2015) Emotion Coaching - a strategy for promoting behavioural self-regulation in children and young people in schools: A pilot study, European Journal of Social and Behavioural Sciences, 13, 1766-1790.
 
-Tuning in to Kids ,  Sophie Havighurst and Ann Harley  http://www.tuningintokids.org.au/professionals/research/  Mindful,  Department Psychiatry,  the University of Melbourne
 
-John Gottman,(1997). Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child: The Heart of Parenting. Simon and Schuster: New York.
 
-Adele Faber, and Elaine Mazlish (1980, 2000). How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids will Talk., Avon Books: New York.
 
-Adele Faber, and Elaine Mazlish, (1987, 1998) Siblings Without Rivalry. Avon Books: New York.
 
-The Gottman Institute http://www.gottman.com
 
-Emotionally Intelligent Parenting (EQParenting)
 
-Dan Siegel , Handmodel of the brain; The Whole-Brain Child, p.62-63  © Mind Your Brain, Inc., 2015
* how do we look after our own and our colleagues emotional health
* self regulation/colleagues/parents
*self care
includes all emotions; ie, happy, sad, excitment, shame, anger, envy, guilt etc...
and finally....
questions
contacts details & support
handouts
feedback
thank you!
Emotion Coaching
or
Emotional Intelligence
is the ability to; be truly present, tune in and understand what is really going on for another person,
before
moving towards a resolution.


Based on the work of Dr John Gottman;


"Emotion Coaching is helping children and young people to understand the different emotions they experience, why they occur, and how to handle them"


our emotions are hardwired; humans across the globe have the same basic emotions
Vagus Nerve

Author "The Explosive Child
www.livesinthebalance
copyright Bath Spa University, with thanks to Louise Bomber for her contribution to this scenario

connects from our brain to all our vital organs, it sends messages to calm our body down
"All Emotions & feelings are acceptable but not all behaviours are"
do we accept all of a child's emotions, however uncomfortable they might be for us?
Daniel.J.Siegel.The Whole-Brain Child, p2-63 @ Mind Your Brain.Inc.2015
Full transcript