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- De-Escalate, DO NOT Escalate -
(You cannot win a power struggle that doesn't exist: you already have all the power, learn to share it effectively.)
- Respect begets Respect-
(Treat students firmly but fairly in the way you would want to be treated in their position.(
Always Give Explanations
(Rules and consequences should be presented as the logical result of behavior, not intrinsically "good" or "bad". Think in terms of useful goals and mistaken goals.)
Remember To HURL:
1. Hear: If you ask a student for an explanation of their behavior, listen carefully to determine their motivation.
2. Understand: Ask reflective questions based on what you hear to help students understand their motives
3. Replace: Help students discover and exchange their mistaken goals for useful ones
4. Learn: Part of students developing new goals is learning the consequences of their actions. Be fair AND consistent.
1. Children who fail to achieve a sense of self-worth through using the first three behaviors often become discouraged and give up, seeking to "wrap themselves in a cloak of inadequacy." (also referred to as learned helplesness)
2. The primary goal of theses students is to be left alone as they attempt to retain any sense of self esteem by avoiding any further public failure.
3. Teacher should focus on giving student individual attention through offering alternatives to inaction based on the logical consequences of doing nothing, emphasize positive action.
1. Inappropriate behavior is motivated by a need to gain attention.
2. If the motive for attention is satisfied, inappropriate behavior associated with other motives will be manifested.
3. Inappropriate behavior can be terminated by helping students find legitimate ways to satisfy their needs.
4. Children can learn to understand their own motives and consequently eliminate misbehavior by having teachers help them explore why they behave as they do.
5. Students behave more appropriately in the classroom when they suffer the logical consequences of their behavior.
6. Presenting students with a choice between two alternative behaviors offers a sufficient basis on which they can learn to be responsible.
1. When students' attention seeking behavior is thwarted, they often claim to have been dealt with unfairly, and attempt to "get even".
2. Behaviors can include provoking others to retaliate and destructive classroom behaviors such as vandalism.
3. Teacher must realize that students lash out because they are hurt in some way
4. Confront the student privately at a later time in a non-class setting, focus discussion on why the student feels aggrieved or powerless while offering alternative behaviors based on logical consequences of their actions.
1. Engaging in power contest never benefits the teacher: de-escalate, don't escalate.
2. Focus on the problem, not the student (I messages)
3. Whenever possible, use class discussion to illustrate logical consequences of misplaced motivations and present a more useful behaviors based on avoiding the logical consequences of the mispalced motivations.
1. It is important not to give all your attention active constructive students while ignoring or overlooking passive constructive students.
2. Praise publicly, correct privately.
3. Praise students' efforts, not just their end results.