Youth Development 101

"I was successful because you believed in me."

-Ulysses S. Grant in a letter to Abraham Lincoln

Youth Development 101

by Ara Arzumanian

Your Relationship to your Students

I See You

Affirmation First, Advice Second

We must see the child’s gifts

and reflect them back to them.

If you cannot yet see the gift,

you are not yet in a position to advise.

It's not about me!

Y NNAPPP?

You Need Not Accept the Premise of the Presenting Problem

12 days of suspension, 4 fights

Case Study

6 days of suspension, 3 fights, vandalism

Let me know you're excited to see me.

1 day of suspension

2.9 GPA, 60 credits,

2.3 GPA, 55 credits,

2.5 GPA, 50 credits,

Student X

First progress report:

1. Chemistry - F

2. PE - C

3. English - B

4. Spanish - C

5. Drama - B+

6. Electronic Engineering (counts as math) at community college. No grade available.

• 9th Grade -
• 10th Grade -
• 11th Grade -
• 12th Grade -

How you play is as important as what you say

Scores in 97th percentile

-Davis Vo

"your affect can have a huge effect."

• First semester GPA - 3.3 including an A in college course

• Second semester GPA - 3.9 including an A in a college course

...

Takes ASVAB -

• Community College, Business Owner, UC Irvine class of 2000

Your energy will be reflected

and

Authenticity will always be appreciated

Communication

• Verbal vs. Non-verbal
• Effective Communication Blocks

handout

Understanding our Kids

Strengths-based perspective

Strengths Based Language

..

• Obnoxious
• Rude, arrogant
• Resistant
• Lazy, un-invested
• Manipulative
• Attention Seeking
• Different, odd
• Stubborn, defiant

• Good at pushing people away
• Good at affecting people
• Cautious
• Good at preventing furthur hurts, failures
• Good at getting needs met
• Good at caring about and loving yourself
• Under-appreciated
• Good at standing up for yourself

Unconditional Positive Regard

Approaching students from a strengths-based perspective means that you don't make your care and understanding contingent on their behavior.

• Look for strengths, where others see weakness.
• Speak about a hopeful future.
• Help students have a hopeful self outlook.
• Don't be sarcastic

They recognize their strengths, because when you recognize their strengths (and your own strengths), you invite them to recognize their strengths as well.

What does this mean for my students?

Infancy

Trust vs. Mistrust

0-1

Infants are dependent upon their caregivers. The quality of care that the child receives plays an important role in the shaping of their personality.

• When needs are consistently met, child learns to trust people caring for him. If needs not consistently met, child begins to mistrust people around him.
• This also contributes to understanding of world as a safe or dangerous place, future vs. no-future.

Early Childhood

1~3

Autonomy vs. Shame/Doubt

Children at this stage are focused on developing a greater sense of self-control. They begin to make their own choices, good or bad

• Gaining a sense of personal control over the world is important. Toilet training plays major role; learning to control one’s body functions leads to a feeling of control and a sense of independence. Other important events include gaining more control over food
• Children who successfully complete this stage feel secure and confident, while those who do not are left with a sense of inadequacy and self-doubt.choices, toy preferences and clothing selection.

Play Age

Initiative vs. Guilt

3~6

Wonder years. Children are curious about everything. Children begin to assert their power and control over the world through directing play and other social interaction.

• Children need to begin asserting control and power over the environment by taking initiative by planning activities, accomplishing tasks and facing challenges.
• This is where they decide what kind of a person they want to be
• Expanded social radius including teachers, camp counselors etc. These other people offer a field of initiative having less conflict then parents
• It is important for caregivers to encourage exploration and to help make appropriate choices
• Play and imagination takes on an important role at this stage.
• Initiative is associated with role experimentation which is a sense of trust in one’s own expression.
• Their sense of initiative is reinforced by being given the freedom and encouragement to play.
• When efforts to engage in physical and imaginative play are stifled by caregivers, children begin to feel that their self-initiated efforts are a source of embarrassment.
• Caregivers who are discouraging or dismissive may cause children to feel ashamed of themselves and to become overly dependent upon the help of others.
• Success in this stage leads to a sense of purpose, while failure results in a sense of guilt.
• Overall a healthy sense of initiative is associated with someone who has goals and enjoys their achievements. These people find ways to meet their own needs while remaining moral.
• They have a strong superego

School Age

Industry vs. Inferiority

6~11

Beginning at a around age 6 children are given more difficult tasks such as reading, writing, problem solving, and self care. This is referred to as the “industry phase.” “Inferiority" will result from a child being discouraged during these tasks and will thus see themselves as deficient

• The major transition from home life to participating in a public life.
• Self-concept and self-esteem unfold and reflect the internal psychological organization of the child and processes in which child compares self to others
• Peer relationships influence psychosocial and academic functioning
• Through peer relationships children learn about conformity, rejection, sensitivity.
• Performing more complex tasks. Strive to master new tasks i.e. basketball, dance etc.
• Children who are encouraged by parents through positive mirroring etc. develop confidence and begin to believe in themselves
• Children who receive little encouragement or praise from parents or teachers or peers will begin to doubt their ability to be successful

Adolescence

12~18

Identity vs. Identity confusion

The question for this stage is “Who am I and where am I going?” Adolescents are in search of an identity that will lead them into adulthood.

• The elements for a positive outcome are that they need to make a conscious search for identity which is built on the outcome and resolution of conflict in the earlier stages.
• The elements for a negative outcome are when the adolescent can NOT make deliberate decisions about school performance, vocation, sexual orientation and life in general. Role confusion may become a threat.
• Here is where they establish their own identities and see themselves as separate from their parents.
• It is important to note that the stage of adolescence is long and can be broken into early or young teenager and older adolescent.
• The actual role identity and sexual identity are generally not formed until later adolescence.
• Because identity takes many years to become grounded and being that this period sets the stage for intimacy, many believe that role identity is not solidified until the early or mid twenties.

Young Adulthood

Intimacy vs. Isolation

18~40

Intimacy is the ability to be close to others as a lover, friend and participant in society such as business and professional practices.

• Having a fully formed sense of self (established during Identity versus role confusion stage) is essential to being able to form intimate relationships.
• Vital that people develop close committed relationships.
• Love experienced in this stage is not based on sexual needs, but instead on the person’s need to be able to define their identity by seeing it reflected in their partner.
• There becomes a shared sense of identity in which “me-ness becomes we-ness.”
• Both partners must demonstrate flexibility, trust, kindness, appreciation and generosity.
• The successful resolution of this stage requires the need for personal gratification to be subordinated to needs for mutual satisfaction.
• The person with a secure sense of identity is willing to take chances with this type of commitment bc they sense they have a secure base to return to if things get out of hand.
• People who are unwilling or unable to take chances with their identity in order to make such commitments are left with a sense of “isolation.”
• Isolation - people can be together in a committed relationship and still feel isolated.

I'm smarter than I thought!

Bullying?

Fixed Mindset

Hungry kid?

• "I'm smart."
• "I'm not that smart."
• "I don't like learning."
• "I'll never be good at this."
• "I hate reading."

In other words:

I believe my ability to learn is fixed, and cannot grow or change.

Mandated Reporter

Growth Mindset

You must report if:

• "I don't understand this."
• "I like learning."
• "This is hard, but I'm trying."
• "I used to not be good at that, but now I'm much better.

• A child is being hurt
• Is in danger of being hurt
• Is in danger of hurting him/herself

In other words:

I believe my ability to learn can grow. If I don't feel very smart right now, I can become better at something and feel smarter about it.

See it in action

Agela Duckworth

If you find out any of the above or are not sure, you MUST:

1. Tell your supervisor immediately.

2. Supervisor tells director immediately.

3. We determine if we need to make a report.

4. If so decided, we make a report.

5. We document everything that's happened.

Carol Dweck

DCFS Child protection Hotline 24/7 - (800) 540-4000

**This process will be overlapped also with any process/policy the school has. Neither will replace the other. You MUST do both

Gaining a better understanding of our youth and their developing minds will help us become better advisers.

07.30.15