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crucial

accountability

PATTERSON | GRENNY | MAXFIELD | MCMILLAN | SWITZLER

tools for resolving violated expectations, broken commitments, and bad behavior

Ling Lin

Hannibal Miksis

Krista Millemann

Kayla Rigenhagen

Laurel Wageman

Benjamin Williams

Where Do You Stand?

1. Choose What and If

To avoid getting into an argument, I tend to put off certain discussions longer than I should.

2. Master My Stories

When others don't deliver on a promise, there are times when I judge their reasons for doing so more quickly than I should.

3. Describe the Gap

There are times when I can't figure out how to give others completely honest feedback in a way that won't offend them.

4. Make it Motivating

I can't motivate some of the people to change because I don't have enough power to do so.

5. Make It Easy

There are times when I've asked others for their ideas but didn't really need them because I already had a plan of my own.

6. Stay Focused and Flexible

When people miss a commitment and should have updated me but didn't, I generally let them off the hook—even though they didn't have the courtesy to involve me.

7. Agree on a Plan and Follow Up

People in my personal and work life think I micromanage them.

Mostly "Yes"

Mostly "Yes"

We look forward to sharing some tips with you!

PART I:

Work on Me First

Chapter 1: Choose What and If

Chapter 2: Master My Stories

PART I:

Work on Me First

1. Choose What and If

How to Know What Conversation to Hold and If You Should Have It

What violation?

1.

  • How do you dismantle a bundle of accountability problems?

  • What do you want to discuss?

Decide if you're going to say anything

2.

  • Do you speak up?

  • Do you remain silent?

Part 1: Choose What — Signs That You're Dealing with the Wrong Problem

1. Your solution doesn’t get you what you really want

2. You're constantly discussing the same issue

3. You are getting increasingly upset

You need to confront the right issue

Part 1: Choose What—Get to the Right Conversation

1. Think CPR: Content, Pattern, Relationship

2. Unbundle: Consider Consequences and Intent

3. Prioritize: Ask What You Do and Don't Want

Helpful Tools:

Part 2: Decide If

Unbundled the violation

Picked the issue

Reduce the issue to a clear sentence

You're ready to decide IF!

How do you know if you should address broken promises that aren't straighforward?

Part 2: Decide If—Not Speaking Up When You Should

1. Am I acting out my concerns ?

2. Is my conscience nagging me?

3. Am I choosing the certainty of silence over the risk of speaking up?

4. Am I telling myself that I am helpless?

2. Master My Stories

The Hazardous Half-Minute

Setting the tone of the overall climate of the discussion to take place.

Feeling angry, morally superior, and that the other person is guilty

Will ALWAYS end badly!

JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS

Jumping to Conclusions

The Fundamental Attribution Error

  • We argue that other people act the way they do because of :
  • Un-controllable predisposed personality factors
  • their disposition

...as opposed to...

  • Forces in their environment:
  • the situation

Silence or Violence?

Silence

"It is usually better not to deal with issues the first time they occur."

Most people asked will agree with this initial approach.

(Heck, I would as well.)

Don't Be Silent!

By Being Silent:

1. You implicitly give approval.

2. You'll be seen as holding them to a different standard.

3.Each additional offense they make will reaffirm your story about their true motives.

(because you allowed the first offense to take place)

You have responsibility for your decision to be silent.

Violence

  • Vocal: blowing a gasket / Can't take it anymore!

  • Physical: will usually cause a lawsuit.

By becoming violent, you "Become Hypocritical, Abusive, and Clinically Stupid."

Praising Abusive Individuals in Our Culture Today

When abusive individuals succeed, this is IN SPITE of their method, not because of their abuse.

Examples:

Hockey movie "Miracle"— Coach

Music movie "Whiplash" — Jazz Band Director

Always ask yourself:

The Humanitarian Question

The Humanitarian Question

“Why would a reasonable, rational, and decent person do that?”

…you’ll usually stop defcon goblin from coming out and going all CRAY-CRAY on other people.

Reflection—Personal

Become Curious

  • Admitting a problem might stem from several different sources

  • We move from feeling like we are the judge, jury, and executioner (and will bring the HAMMER DOWN on them) to a curious participant

Reflection—Social

The Eyeball Problem

“You’ve got the eyeballs problem: you’re on the wrong side of them if you want to notice the role you’re playing.”

2. In Practice: Community Example: Illicit Drugs

2. In Practice: Community Example: Illicit Drugs

  • One of the greatest challenges in influencing “at-risk” youth in inner-city areas is that the models of successful careers that they see often involve the sale of illegal drugs.

  • It is not simply the influence of others (peer presure) that lures them into illicit trade; it’s financial need.

“Until they see clear alternative pathways to financial well-being, thousands of young men and women will be lost to this social cancer.”

- Crucial Accountability

2. In Practice: Data as a Tool for Change

Showing people with proof why things change as opposed to changing them “because I said so.”

Example: Hospital showing the cost of expensive hospital latex gloves to the employees.

Its about the Facts!

PART II: Create Safety

Chapter 3: Describe the Gap

Chapter 4: Make it Motivating

Chapter 5: Make it Easy

PART II: Create Safety

Chapter 6: Stay Focused & Flexible

3. Describe the Gap

3. Describe the Gap

what we expected vs. what we observed

"violated expectations" or "broken commitments"

"the gap"

Your Path to Success

1. Start with Safety

2. Share Your Path

Master the critical first moments of an accountability discussion:

3. End with a Question

How Others Feel Unsafe

People feel unsafe when they feel one of two things:

1. You don't respect them as human beings (you lack mutual respect)

2. You don't care about their goals (you lack mutual purpose)

1. Start with Safety

Tell the Rest of the Story

The Humanitarian Question:

“Why would a reasonable, rational, and decent person do that?”

  • Give them the benefit of the doubt

  • Assume that others are rational, reasonable, and decent

1. Start with Safety

Use Contrasting

1. Imagine what others might erroneously conclude

2. Immediately explain that this is what you don't mean

3. As a contrasting point; explain what you do mean

1. Start with Safety

Contrasting in Practice

"I know you tried your best to improve your grades. I'm satisfied with your effort. Please don't hear me as being less than proud of your progress. I'd just like to share a few study ideas that might help you maintain your grades more easily." pg. 86-87

Establish Mutual Purpose

  • Build common ground

  • Let others know that your intentions are pure

  • Establish the goal of your conversation

1. Start with Safety

Establishing Mutual Purpose in Practice

"If it's ok with you, I'd like to spend a couple minutes talking about how we made that last decision. My goal is to come up with a method we're both comfortable with." pg. 88

Additional Tips

  • Ask for permission

  • Speak in private

  • Avoid inappropriate humor and group attacks

1. Start with Safety

Start with Facts

2. Share Your Path

  • Stay external
  • NO: "You're rude."
  • YES: "You cut the person off in midsentence."

  • Explain what, not why
  • NO: "You're afraid."
  • YES: "You spoke so quietly, it was hard to hear."

  • Gather facts, not judgements
  • NO: "He's arrogant" (that's not enough)

Word Choice

NO: "You said"

YES: "I thought we agreed"

NO:"It's clear"

YES: "I was wondering if"

Gently test your assumptions and conclusions

2. Share Your Path

A Simple, Diagnostic Question

3. End with a Question

"What happened?"

(an honest inquiry, not a veiled threat; your goal is to hear the other person's point of view)

3. In Practice

"Chris, I noticed that you missed the meeting you had agreed to attend. I was wondering what happened. Did you run into a problem of some kind?"

4. Make it Motivating

4. Make it Motivating

Consequences Motivate

people act on the basis of the overall consequence bundle

4. Make it Motivating

Explore Natural Consquences

Within a business setting, this typically includes what's happening to stakeholders: employees, customers, shareowners, communities, and regulatory agencies.

4. Make it Motivating

Match Method to Circumstances

Explain both what needs to be done and why. When dealing with someone who is pushing back, resist the temptation to revert to power or superficial rewards.

4. In Practice

4. In Practice

"You've mentioned wanting to be the art director. In my view you will be much more successful in that position—and more likely to get it—if you have a solid working relationship with both the editing staff and the video team."

5. Make it Easy

5. Make it Easy

How to Make Keeping Commitments (Almost) Painless

Ability vs. Motivation

  • Impossible to do something
  • Wanting to do something

Involvement

  • Enables
  • Motivates

Asking For Ideas

“Start by asking other people for their ideas. They’re closest to the problem; start with their best thinking.” (pg. 148)

5. In Practice

5. In Practice

  • Identify and remove ability blocks
  • Checking both sides
  • ‘It sounds like you’re willing to do this, but is there anything standing in your way?’ (pg 159)

Chapter 6. Stay Focused and Flexible

What to Do When Others Get Sidetracked, Scream, or Sulk

Four Different Emergent Problems

Four Different Emergent Problems

Loss of Safety

Loss of Safety

Restore Safety

Shared Purpose

Loss of Trust

"Something Came Up”

A Completely Different Issue

  • Announce a change in topic
  • Leave a bookmark

A Completely Different Issue

Explosive Emotions Take Over

  • Talk about facts
  • Get rid of emotions
  • Solve the problem

6. In Practice

  • How To Remain Flexible
  • “If something comes up, let me know as soon as you can.” (Pg. 171)
  • Need for Flexibility
  • Need for Predictability

PART III: Move to Action

Chapter 7: Agree on a Plan and Follow Up

PART III: Move to Action

Chapter 8: Put It All Together

Chapter 9: The 12 "Yeah-Buts"

What to do after an accountability crucial conversation

7. Agree on a Plan and Follow Up: How to Gain Commitment a...

7. Agree on a Plan and Follow Up: How to Gain Commitment and Move to Action

Make a Plan Complete with WWWF:

  • Ask if there are any questions about anything related to the discussion to make sure everyone understands the task.

  • Contrast if you think people are likely to misunderstand.

Does WHAT

WHO

By WHEN

Make a Plan Complete with WWWF:

  • Decide when and how you will follow up on what is supposed to happen.

  • Risk: How risky/crucial is the project or needed result?

  • Trust: How well has this person performed in the past; what is their track record?

  • Competence: How experienced is the person in this area?

FOLLOW-up

Two Forms of Follow-Up: Checkup and Checkback

  • Checkup:

  • When feeling anxious or uneasy

  • Be in charge of the follow-up

  • Checkback:

  • Use when the task is routine
  • Asking for input helps bring issues to light that might cause problems in the future.

Take Time to Summarize:

Follow-Up Tips:

Put follow-up dates and times on computer

Put follow-up times on your agenda

Use sticky notes to remind yourself

8. Put It All Together: How to Solve Sticky, Complicat...

8. Put It All Together: How to Solve Sticky, Complicated Problems

The Big Idea from Each Step:

Choose What and If

Describe the Gap

Master My Stories

Stay Focused and Flexible

Agree on a Plan and Follow-up

Make it Motivating and Easy

8. In Practice

8. In Practice

Line cutters:

Have you?

Effective vs Ineffective Positive behavioral changes

Spread the word

Make people accountable!

9. The 12 "Yeah-Buts"

9. The 12 "Yeah-Buts"

The "Yeah-Buts"

1. Confronting authority

2. Breaking from the pack

3. Married to a Mime

4. Hearsay

5. Potentially devastating

6. Way out of line and scary

The "Yeah-Buts"

7. Changing your culture

8. Borderline behavior

9. Our plate is overflowing

10. I don’t want to be a nag

11. Our relationship is based solely on problems

12. I don’t think we can change

Your Four Options

  • Carp
  • Converse
  • Cope
  • Cut out

Confronting Authority

"What you need is not a bigger hammer but a bigger heart." (pg. 227)

Breaking From the Pack

Make It Safe

Humanize the Competing Motivators

I Don't Want To Be A Nag

When a person has failed to live up to a promise you can:

3. Cope

2. Nag

1. Converse

Conclusion & Questions

Success Stories

Handwashing in Hospitals

% to

%

Large Defense Contractor

%

million

.

Most Valued Employees

Learn how to hold others accountable, learn how to bring predictability and trust into an organization, and you'll be counted as one of your company's most valued assets by company leaders.

?

References

1. Patterson, Kerry. Crucial Accountability: Tools for Resolving Violated Expectations, Broken Commitments, and Bad Behavior. McGraw-Hill, 2013.

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