Five Poor Listening Styles
Spacing Out
- when we ignore someone because our mind is wandering off
- we're caught up in our thoughts and feelings
Pretend Listening
- when we aren't paying much attention to what the other person is saying, but we add insightful comments at key junctures
- "Yeah" "Cool" "Sounds Great"
Selective Listening
- we only pay attention to what interests us
- we talk about what WE want to talk about instead of what the other person wants to talk about
Word Listening
- we only pay attention to the words, NOT the body language
Self-Centered Listening
- we see everything from OUR point of view
- often a game of one-upmanship
- We usually reply in one of three ways:
- We judge
- We probe
- We advise