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Gentlemen Etiquette for the Victorian Era
4
Transcript
Etiquette for Men During the Victorian Era
Table Manners: A few rules
Conversational Etiquette for a Gentleman in the Victorian Era
- general rules for daily meals
- ex: don't talk loudly
- trouble with the food
- ex: don't show dislike of food
- in the presence of ladies
- ex: never help a lady with an escort
- indirect gestures
- ex: if you want more to drink put your spoon in your saucer
With a Lady
- immediately offer use of his chair
- if at a performance, must remain seated with her and avoid conversation
- avoid asking a lady something that could upset her
With another Gentleman
- 'in the company of an inferior, never let him feel inferior either by your speech or manner'
- NEVER speak about himself
- NEVER ask direct questions or use slang terms
Video on Victorian Etiquette:
Social Etiquette of the Victorian Era
Male Fashion for the
Victorian Era
Invitations:
- gentleman must send the lady a written invitation no later than the day before
- must be written in the third person
- written on white note paper of the finest quality and an envelope to match
At the Event:
- expected to reserve the best seats he could manage
- should take the outside seat unless it is more suitable for hearing and seeing
- considered rude to show affection at public events
- applause is only due to the deserving performer
Rules
- must remove his hat when entering a room
- always wear gloves in the street, church, and at formal occasions
- during the day, gray or dark gloves must be worn, and during the evening, white or cream-colored gloves must be worn
Acknowledgment
- lady- take off hat and bow
- gentleman- small nod of head, touch of hat, or gesture of hand
Marriage in the Victorian Era
Marriage in the Victorian Era was not as romanticized as it is depicted to be in many novels and movies. "Love" actually played a minor role in most matrimonies.
Some Interesting Rules for Engagement and Marriage:
- It was illegal to marry your deceased wife's sister but you could marry first cousins
- Victorians were encouraged to marry within the same class
- Women lost all of their possessions once they were married
- Engagements typically lasted from 6 months to 2 years; once it became "official" people were allowed to be more affectionate
Views on Divorce:
- Divorce was very difficult to obtain and looked down upon
- Divorce was extremely expensive; it caused property and wealth to be lost
- Laws were modified in the mid 19th century to make it more accessible for men and women
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