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The seven habits of highly effective teens
Transcript of The seven habits of highly effective teens
is how you feel about
yourself. (The amount of
trust and confidence you
have in yourself.) A Relationship Bank Account
is how you feel about others.
(The amount of trust and
confidence you have in each
of your relationships with others.) Personal Bank Account Deposits
* Keep promises to yourself
* Do small acts of kindness
* Be gentle with yourself
* Be honest in all your dealings
* Enhance your talents
* Take care of yourself PARADIGM The way you see something, your point of view, frame of reference, or belief. What is a paradigm shift?
A paradigm shift is a way of
looking at something differently.
We are stepping “outside the box”.
When we make a paradigm shift we
can see, think, feel and behave differently. Respect is an example of something that teenagers sometimes have a different paradigm on than we do. Respect is principle to live by-Ginny Seek First To
Be Understood Listen
People tens to be misunderstood when talking to another person and that
person who is listening usually reads the person wrong, this
judging the action of the person talking and this makes the person a
failure to listing. Understanding is the first steps to knowing the person intent. Synergize Open-mindedness.
to do things. Work
together to achieve
differences Personal Bank
* Break promises
* Keep to yourself
* Do not listen
* Be arrogant
* Set false expectations Poor Listening Skills
Mimicking Genuine Listening
> Listen with eye, heart and ear
> Standing in their shoes
> Mirroring Put First
First Teens are busier today and working harder than ever. You now need to learn to prioritize and manage your time. This also examines your learning to overcome your fears and to be strong during the hard moments. This is sometimes called the will-power and the won’t power.
Procrastinator: All things are both urgent and important. They put things off until they are a ‘stress case’ They are addicted to urgency until it becomes a crisis. They often say they thrive under pressure. Results - stress and anxiety, burnout, mediocre performance The Yes-Man: Things are urgent but not important. Usually trying to please others. Loaded down with activities that are important to other people but not important to themselves - would like to say no …but don’t. They often cave into peer pressure because they do not have enough courage or backbone to turn others down. Results - reputation as a ‘pleaser’, lack discipline, feel like a doormat
Prioritizer: things are important but not urgent. EXCELLENCE! Takes a little more planning. They have got it together and do their best work. Avoids stress and burnout. People who matter come first and life is balanced. Can say no with a smile. Resist peer pressure and come to be respected for it. Results - control of life, balance, high performance. Synergy: celebrates differences, teamwork, open mindedness, new better ways
Everywhere in nature, good teams are made of, a good band has it
Differences: a process, learn to celebrate, thank goodness for diversity, more than racial and gender diffs, also physical features, dress, language, wealth, family, religious, lifestyle, education, interests, skills, age, style.
World is a melting pot of cultures, races, religions, ideas… three approaches you can take:1)Shunner: afraid, convinced their way of life is best. Tolerator: believe everyone
has right to be different
but don’t embrace, keep to self,
never get to synergy.
Celebrator: value differences,
see advantages, achieve more
than two who think alike,
creates sparks and opportunity,
is a STRUGGLE for most of us Think
Win-Win Competing: can be healthy, drives us to improve, reach, and stretch, and like Star Wars that is “the force” the positive side, but there is also the negative side, “the Dark side”, both are powerful. Dark when self worth is tied to winning or used to place self above another. Comparing: nothing but bad news, everyone is on different developmental timetables, building your life on how you compare is never sure footing, only good to compare self against your own potential. Too often we play not to lose, this will fill your heart with negative feelings.
Win-win is the foundation for getting along well with others, believing we are all equal
Totem: win-lose, competitive, “I don’t care how good I am as long as I’m a notch higher than you on the totem pole.”
Doormat: Lose-win, dangerous too, Weak, low expectations, compromise own standards, people wipe their dirty feet on you, hide true feelings deep inside, this lose-win is only ok if issue is not important to you, not worth the battle, let others win the little issues. NEVER allow yourself to be in
an abusive relationship, it’s a
never ending cycle that never
Spiral: Lose-Lose, misery enjoys
company, “if I am going down,
then, sucker, you are coming
with me.” Revenge, want to
win at all costs!
Buffet: Win-Win, belief that
everyone can win, you car
about others and want them
to succeed, care about yourself
too, abundant, plenty of success,
true joy, win-win always creates more. All about keeping your personal self sharp so you can better deal with life
four key dimensions - body, mind, heart, soul Body in general: junior high - body goes through weird changes, handle body with care and don’t abuse, ten ways to keep selves sharp: eat good food, relax in the tub, bike, lift weights, sleep enough, Yoga, sports, walk, stretch, aerobics, the four main ingredients; good sleep, relaxation, good nutrition, exercise. Life/Art: magazines = images, totally touched up!
Don’t treat your body like a prisoner of war just
to be accepted by someone else
Quit: destroy body with addictive substances,
often playing with ‘gateway’ drugs opens
door to harsher drugs, addiction’s worst
thing is you lose control, the addiction is!
Refusal skill, feeling pressured?
1, ask self tough questions to make you think
3, suggest alternative
4, take off - get away fast