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Can Fathers "Mother"?
Transcript of Can Fathers "Mother"?
What's Your Opinion?
Just because a father cannot carry a child do you think they have any less of an emotional connection after the child is born?
What Do You Think?
Essentials of Parenting:
* Be able to provide physical needs (food, clothing, shelter etc.)
* Provide a stable and loving environment
* Emotionally support a child
* Be able to teach them to grow up with morals and values
Can a father provide these essentials?
Men cannot carry a child, so they do not feel the development of the child in them. Only a women can experience the feeling of a child growing inside of them, therefore a father may not understand the connection between a mother and her child. The developing fetus hears the mother's heartbeat and voice. The fetus may also respond to touch or movement of the mother. This usually equates in a strong bond being formed between a mother and the fetus. Also, some men have very high stress jobs, so they may not have as much communication with their kids, and therefore do not develop the same emotional attachment to their children like a mother might.
Cultural and Societal Influences:
For a long time in many cultures, there has been the stigma that it is solely a mother's job to take care of the children. Due to this thought, many fathers in many cultures are not very involved in their child's lives. This is because it is not seen as their "job" to help take care of the children, and so they would have great difficulty playing the role of the mother if they ever had to.
There are many reasons why a father is able to play the role of the mother. Someone doesn't need to give birth to a child in order to be a good parent.
Many men are able to be nurturing and can show that nurturing side of them to their children. Many fathers are able to provide for their children not only physically and financially, but emotionally as well. They are able to be there for their child on an emotional level in their times of need and can comfort and support them just as well as a mother can.
Roles Starting to Change:
Not every women who gives birth to a child automatically have maternal instincts. In fact, there are some women who do not have any emotional attachment to children, so therefore they may not have the patience to deal with them. Now a days, there are many fathers who take "paternal" leave and instead of the mother staying home with the baby, it is the father who takes time off work to stay home with their child.
“The number of single parents jumped 8% between 2006 and 2011, including a 16% spike in the number of single fathers, and a 6% increase in single mothers.” (Statistics Canada)
By: Nadia Sampogna and Natalie Tzanis
Forced to Play the Role:
Not all the reasons why a father may have to mother may be ideal. Some fathers may be put into the situation where they are forced to play the mother role. For example, men who are widowers become forced to play the role of both mother and father to their child because their mother is no longer with them. The same can happen if a couple gets divorced or separated and the mother is not in the child's life. The father is then forced to be both the mother and father figure in their child's life, especially if the child does not have another women who they can look up to as a mother figure.
Same Sex Marriages:
Gender does not determine whether one will be a good parent or not. Therefore, gay people are just as capable of creating loving and supportive families. There are more and more homosexual males that are now starting families through adoption and surrogacy. Gay men are playing the roles of both mother and father. There are homosexual men who have more maternal and feminine characteristics
than others so this can be compared to a mother role. Gay couples are a lot like heterosexual where even though
the two partners are of the same sex, they still
sometimes struggle just like any other parent does.
Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka
Do you think changes in society (same sex marriages, more women in workforce, custody laws) have forced fathers to play more of a mother role?
Sydney White Clip
Although there are points showing that fathers are able to play the role of the mother, there are also points which demonstrate why a father cannot completely take over and "mother" their children
It is not unknown that when fathers have to watch or take care of their child or children on their own they may become a little overwhelmed. This is mostly due to the fact that many men do not have maternal instincts. Most fathers do not understand a baby’s nonverbal communication as well as women do. Fathers cannot nurse, and they are usually clumsier with the details of cleaning, dressing and feeding the child.
What is your personal opinion on whether or not fathers can play the role of mother?