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A Modern Modest Proposal

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Amber Posey

on 23 April 2010

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Transcript of A Modern Modest Proposal

Homelessness In the year 2000, there was a general concensus that the number of
homeless people in America exceeded 750,000. In the next ten years it has been
obvious that the number has increased. There are two theories on the causes of homelessness.
They are:
1) Society based conditions such as, minimum wage employment, lack of public assistance services, and lack of mental health services.

2) Personal problems like not wanting to work, excessive substance abuse, and poor money management skills So... we need to do something
to fix this problem! Unlike South Park, I have came up with a
much more efficient way of solving this issue. Since about 70% of all homeless people live in the city, it makes it really easy to gather them up. First the community needs to
come together to build a shelter
to house them all.
Next, we need to sort the healthy from the non-healthy. Sine the non-healthy are useless we shall stick them in a room to be gased later. Gas chamber!!! While the usless bodies are waiting in line for their
turn, huge speakers will be blasting poka music. Everyone
needs a good distraction, right? While they are getting gased, the healthy people
will be sent to the soup kitchen. But instead of feeding
them soup they will be killed and they are then considered
beef. The beef will then be shipped to Africa to help feed
the starving, AIDS infested nation. Now that all the homeless
people have disappeared, we
can go green and recyle all the
card board boxes that line the
empty streets. These boxes can be used to build a huge
fire. This fire will be used to cremate all the
bodies that were gased earlier. Once the fire has been put out
and the ashes swept away
our problem with the homeless
is gone. There will never be anyone
begging for change, doing drugs
on the street, or just being in the way ever again. As you think about what
has just been proposed, please
remember that this is all for a better
cause. You will be feeding the starving
kids in Africa. Thank you for your time!
Full transcript