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Which thesis statement is better?

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by

Amy Winger

on 17 November 2014

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Transcript of Which thesis statement is better?

Which thesis statement is better?
Which is better?
Option 1:

This paper will cover the benefits that accompany e-learning.
Option 2:
An online degree can lead one to a more
successful professional, financial, and
personal life.
Which is better?
This is not the best thesis statement:
This paper will cover the benefits that accompany e-learning.
This is an announcement; announcements do not make good thesis statements.
This is the best thesis statement: An online degree can lead one to a more successful professional, financial, and personal life.
This thesis statement is a thesis statement that lists points. You can see the three main supporting arguments representing each body paragraph in the list.
Option 1: Online learning is an effective way to earn a degree.

Option 2: In the following paragraphs you will learn that online learning is a valid way to earn a degree.

This is the better thesis statement: Online learning is an effective way to earn a degree.
This is the better thesis statement of the two because such a statement would easily allow for the author to write three paragraphs about three different ways online learning is an effective way to earn a degree. For example, the author could write a paragraph each on why online learning is cost-effective, convenient, and highly individualized.
This is not the best thesis statement: In the following paragraphs you will learn that online learning is a valid way to earn a degree.
This, too, is announcement and would therefore not make a good thesis statement. It also uses second person language, which should be avoided in academic writing in order to make it more objective in tone.
Which is better?
Option 1: Online learning is becoming standard in the education world.

Option 2: Online learning has proven its validity in the education world.

This is not the best thesis statement: Online learning is becoming standard in the education world.
This is not a good thesis statement because it is a fact and cannot be argued. Good thesis statements contain an argument that can be proven in the body of the essay.
This is the better thesis statement: Online learning has proven its validity in the education world.
This is the better thesis statement because a writer could then formulate a body that detailed at least three main reasons online education is a valid way to learn.
Which is better?
Option 1: Online learning is better than traditional learning because it is more flexible, cost-effective, and individualized.

Option 2: Online learning is effective.

This is the better thesis statement: Online learning is better than traditional learning because it is more flexible, cost-effective, and individualized.
This is a better thesis statement because it lists its three main points that will be used to support the idea that online learning is superior.
This is not the best thesis statement: Online learning is effective.
This is not the best thesis statement because it is too broad. Instead, more information should be detailed, such as ways it is effective or for whom it is effective.
Which is better?
Option 1: Since online learning is engaging, widely available, and versatile, it is growing in popularity.

Option 2: Based on a survey conducted by the College Board, in 2012 the percentage of online college students increased by 570,000 students moving up from the 6.7 million students who took at least one online course during the fall of 2011 term.

This is the better thesis statement: Since online learning is engaging, widely available, and versatile, it is growing in popularity.
This is the stronger thesis statement because it is broad enough to support a variety of arguments in favor of the main argument, which is that there are many reasons online learning is growing in popularity.

This is not the best thesis statement: Based on a survey conducted by the College Board, in 2012 the percentage of online college students increased by 570,000 students moving up from the 6.7 million students who took at least one online course during the fall of 2011 term.
This thesis statement is too narrow. Facts make better supporting details than thesis statements.
Which is better?
Option 1: Online learning is available through most universities.

Option 2: Online learning is in high demand across many universities due to its convenience, price, and high standards.

This is not the best thesis statement: Online learning is available through most universities.
This thesis statement is too narrow and more of an argument needs to be present in it.
This is the better thesis statement: Online learning is in high demand across many universities due to its convenience, price, and high standards.
This is a better thesis statement because it is not too broad and not too narrow.
Which is better?
Option 1: Online learning is an integral part of all young learners’ futures.

Option 2: Online learning is being used more and more.

This is the better thesis statement: Online learning is an integral part of all young learners’ futures.
This is the better thesis statement because it is capable of supporting at least three body paragraphs and is yet still focused on one sub-topic related to online learning.
This is not the best thesis statement: Online learning is being used more and more.
This is too narrowly focused. Instead, it needs to be expanded upon, or it might be better used as a supporting detail.
Thank you for taking this quiz!

If you have any questions, be sure to let your instructor know!
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Full transcript