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Body Language

Quick overview about body language
by

Florian Michalik

on 30 June 2009

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Transcript of Body Language

Body Language .
by Florian Michalik
In Our Lifes
Neuro Linguistic
Programming

More About It
Importance
Authenticity
Best Practices
We transmit 93% of our
feelings in a non-verbal way!
"The bodily gestures, postures, and facial expressions by which a person communicates nonverbally with others"
Soukhanov 1992
How we come across to someone is only for a small part decided by the words we speak.
Intuition
Communication
“I have a feeling he/she likes me”
“I doubt if what he/she is saying is really the truth.“
consciously & subconsciously
Authenticity decreases from feet to head
This video
is just fun
Extreme
Body
Language
Head and Face
Easy to control
Represents how you feel (mimic and mouth)
Represents what you think (eyes, eyebrows)
Medium controlable
Represents how you [want to] act
Arms and Hands
Legs and Feet
Quite hard to control
Represents your standing [save or uncertain]
Words
Tone of voice
Body language
Exsample 1:
Bordom
„I don‘t have any more time“
What are the typical symptoms?

What can you as a facilitator do?
Keeps looking at the watch
Often repeats actions
Looks anywhere but at the person who is talking
Find other things to do
Looks tired
Ask if you are being too repetitive or giving too basic infos
Propose a break, exercise or ask questions to change the “mood”
Make a joke to grab attention
Exsample 2:
I am still thinking about it but won’t share my thoughts (now)
I disagree and wait until I “fire”
What are the typical symptoms?

What can you as a facilitator do?
Hides mouth behind the hands
Forms a “pistol” in front of the mouth
Crossing arms
Frown while being quiet
Ask for the person’s opinion
Give more arguments on your opinion
Exsample 3:
Lying
Being dishonest
What are the typical symptoms?

What can you as a facilitator do?
Lick over the lips
Touching the nose
Looking not in your eyes in that moment
Decide to
Do not let the person realize that you know
Challenge the person
Exsample 4:
dominant people
What are the typical symptoms?

What can you as a facilitator do?
Big/high body
Occupying Territory
Strong handshake
Constantly breaking the conversation
Looking for attention
Can also mean defensive
Continue to appear friendly
Ignore their subtle signals
Out-stare them
Touch them
Interruption of speech: speed up, talk louder, “let me finish please”
Critical approach: Ask them why they are using dominant body language.
Exsample 5:
Eye Contact in presentations
Look at one individual at a time

In another part of the audience, make eye contact with another individual

Answer the question looking at the person who asked

Interact on a personal level!
What means NLP?
Way to the Raport
"If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got!"
Began with the study of excellent communicators
Encompasses neurology, language and patterning
Is the exploration of HOW each individual experiences their own unique set of patterns
Neuro Linguistic Programming
UNDERSTAND WHO YOU ARE
&
CHOOSE HOW YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE
Identify which patterns resource and serve us
Choose to add new/change patterns to our behavior
NLP Exercise
Look way up at the ceiling or sky, smile, raise your arms and . . .

…try to be depressed!
Lower your head and look down to your right, slump your shoulders and…
…try to be happy
Rapport
“Is the ability to enter someone else's world, to make him feel that you understand him, that you have a strong common bond.
It's the ability to go fully from your map of the world to his map of the world.
It's the essence of successful communication."
(Anthony Robbins)
How is it that some people you meet you instantly like -- while others you can't get away from fast enough?

Why can you talk to some people for hours and it seems like minutes?

Did you ever buy something you didn’t need just because the sales person was so nice?

Responsiveness to what another is saying

Hear and be heard

Mutual confidence and trust: “This person thinks like I do, I can relax.”
Reasons to achieve RAPPORT
Better communication

Mutual trust

Enables personal contact

Easier to:
People in RAPPORT feel more comfortable to open themselves
Make deals
Find common understanding
Communicate problems
Find solutions
Techniques of RAPPORT: Mirroring
Learning to duplicate another's behavior:




Something we do everyday without noticing
Gradual Process
Subtle:
Can go terribly wrong if noticed
PRACTICE!!
Body Posture
Hand Gestures
Facial Expressions
Weight Shifts
Breathing
Movement of Feet
Eye Movements
Techniques of RAPPORT: Matching
“Time delay” factor

Cross Over Matching:



Mismatching:
Match one of your behaviors to a corresponding, but different movement of another person
Ex: Blinking rapidly Discreetly tapping finger at the same rate as the blinking.
Break the RAPPORT
Ex: Break eye contact, turn your body at an angle to the other persons.
Tips to achieve RAPPORT
Lean forward
Nod to acknowledge understanding
Make eye contact
Smile!
Sit on the same side of the table
Observe the other
Use the techniques (mirroring/matching)
LISTEN!

Use your body language to achieve it!



Repeat what the other is saying in your own words

Build a personal relationship

Practice, practice, practice!
There is tons of further material...
Body Language
http://changingminds.org/techniques/body/body_language.htm
http://www.gcastrategies.com/books_articles/article_06_11.php
http://www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Good-Listener
http://www.lichaamstaal.com/english/index.html
NLP
http://www.cleanlanguage.co.uk/articles/articles/110/1/What-is-NLP/Page1.html
http://www.cleanlanguage.co.uk/articles/articles/112/1/Rapport-The-Magic-Ingredient/Page1.html
http://www.cleanlanguage.co.uk/articles/articles/113/1/I-See-Hear-and-Feel-What-You-Mean/Page1.html
Sales
http://communication.howstuffworks.com/sales-technique.htm
http://www.allbusiness.com/sales/selling-techniques/3971-1.html
http://www.allbusiness.com/3475477-1.html (Videos)
Use the
Arrow-Keys or the "next"-button.
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