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To This Day

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Isabel Wahono

on 28 February 2013

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Transcript of To This Day

Shane Koyczan TO THIS DAY Metaphors & Similes Koyczan is a Canadian poet and writer born in 1976.
He grew up in Penticton, British Columbia. lived like the uphills were mountains
and the downhills were cliffs
four fifths suicidal
a tidal wave of anti depressants
and an adolescence of being called popper
one part because of the pills
and ninety nine parts because of the cruelty he tried to kill himself in grade ten
when a kid who still had his mom and dad
had the audacity to tell him “get over it” as if depression
is something that can be remedied
by any of the contents found in a first aid kit
to this day
he is a stick on TNT lit from both ends could describe to you in detail the way the sky bends
in the moments before it’s about to fall
and despite an army of friends
who all call him an inspiration
he remains a conversation piece between people
who can’t understand
sometimes becoming drug free
has less to do with addiction
and more to do with sanity we weren’t the only kids who grew up this way
to this day
kids are still being called names
the classics were
hey stupid
hey spaz
seems like each school has an arsenal of names
getting updated every year
and if a kid breaks in a school
and no one around chooses to hear
do they make a sound?
are they just the background noise
of a soundtrack stuck on repeat
when people say things like
kids can be cruel? every school was a big top circus tent
and the pecking order went
from acrobats to lion tamers
from clowns to carnies
all of these were miles ahead of who we were
we were freaks
lobster claw boys and bearded ladies oddities
juggling depression and loneliness playing solitaire spin the bottle
trying to kiss the wounded parts of ourselves and heal but at night
while the others slept
we kept walking the tightrope
it was practice
and yeah
some of us fell

but I want to tell them
that all of this shit
is just debris
leftover when we finally decide to smash all the things we thought
we used to be you built a cast around your broken heart
and signed it yourself
you signed it
“they were wrong”
because maybe you didn’t belong to a group or a clique
maybe they decided to pick you last for basketball or everything
maybe you used to bring bruises and broken teeth
to show and tell but never told
because how can you hold your ground
if everyone around you wants to bury you beneath it
you have to believe that they were wrong why else would we still be here?
we grew up learning to cheer on the underdog
because we see ourselves in them
we stem from a root planted in the belief
that we are not what we were called we are not abandoned cars stalled out and sitting empty on a highway
and if in some way we are
don’t worry
we only got out to walk and get gas we are graduating members from the class of
fuck off we made it
not the faded echoes of voices crying out
names will never hurt me

of course
they did

but our lives will only ever always
continue to be
a balancing act
that has less to do with pain
and more to do with beauty. metaphor metaphor metaphor A person who enjoys taking medication in pill-form. This sentence means that people don’t understand that drugs were the only thing keeping him sane. People have always wanted to cure his addiction because they thought it was the one causing him problems, but it was in fact the drugs that kept everything bad that happened to him at bay. He knew what would happen next before things gotten worse. It could also mean that he saw the bad side of everything before it actually appeared. Someone who is at a disadvantage, a hardworker but hardly noticed. People want to believe that they are not as bad as people say about them and that they are not an abandoned person that no one cares about. They actually feel that they shouldn't worry, because we're not leaving them abandoned forever, we will come back. it is not that easy to get over depression We can't stop the depression as simple as by taking pills from a first aid kit. topic of conversation, gossip The people who he was surrounded with. He is stretched so thin, so stressed out. Wherever he turns, he is waiting to explode. class of medication used to treat depression Person having the quality of being strange or peculiar to try to maintain loneliness and depression into your life, with difficulty. doesn't take away the pain by kissing the wound, but it helps to heal the emotional wound. trying to heal yourself and while making a statement To be strong and fierce when everybody else wants and expects you to suffer. His life was a continuous battle, a roller coaster that was treacherous the whole way. 80% of the time he feels like killing himself. Students/bullies have many backup of names to call other kids and it gets more and more every year when kids break down in school or get bullied, they would cry all the time but everyone just doesn't care about them The names people called us might not mean anything to them, but we carry them on years after we hear it; taunting us. They will never stop to look beyond the hardships that they faced in their childhood to see that there is more to life than their suffering, because through the world's eyes, they will never be good enough. The tightrope represents our life, that maybe practicing every night would make us into somebody the world wants us to be. The social hierarchy as of people where the bullies (dominant group) "pecks" the losers (subordinate people). Every student in the school is being called names, acting like names they got. Clowns, carnies, acrobats to lion tamers. All the students are in a circus. They exist to amuse people. Everyone in the school were freaks. Not only the victims but also the bullies. Freaks were monsters, those who were jeered by other people or the monsters themselves. Pecking order symbolic hierarchy of bullying. Bullies orders tell the victims on how they are supposed to act. "Pecking" is chiseling something, it hurts. Painful bullying pecking order. vehicle tenor
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