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Arranged Marriages: First and second generations

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Tabinduh Ahmad

on 18 December 2013

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Transcript of Arranged Marriages: First and second generations

How North America Perceives arranged marriages
We see it as two people who are stuck together and forced to be married
Arranged Marriages was a norm in the 18th century
Most commonly practiced in South Asia, Africa, Middle East, Latin America, South East Asia and parts of East Asia

Arranged Marriages
Views of first and Second-generation minority youth
Sample survey
First and second generation youth minority working definitions:
We started our research with a sample survey in which we asked many questions from first generation and second generation Canadians. This helped us answer, unanswered and taboo questions regarding Arranged Marriages.
First generation:
A foreign born citizen or resident who has immigrated and been naturalized in a new country of residence.
A naturally born citizen or resident of a country whose parents obey the previous definition
Second generation:
The second generation of a family to inhabit, but the first to be naturally born in, a country
The second generation to be naturally born in a country.
Our survey was consisted of eleven questions
we had 30 subjects to participate in our survey
5 males and 5 females per each age group
First and second generation Canadians
This Is Because...
Arranged marriages are negatively represented or ignored
Misunderstandings, stereotypes and the social media, influences us to believe that arranged marriages don't take the consent of the couple being wedded
Views on Arranged marriages
First generation:
Second generation:
Do you believe majority of second generation youth would genuinely want an arranged marriage? Why or Why not?
Class Discussion
Arranged Marriages
vs. Reality

Anderson Cooper
An arranged marriage is agreed upon by two parties (those parties can be bride\groom family or/also brides and groom themselves
Bend It Like Beckham
Not to be confused with forced marriages where their unable or unwilling to give permission for their marriages
Pinky's marriage was arranged by her family
Jess is a second generation Indian who was born and raised in England, who integrated into the western culture/community
For example: Jessminder's parents want Jess to have a proper traditional Indian wedding, with an Indian husband.
Factors: Arranged Marriages
Many arranged marriages require various analytical research before proceeding , many of these factors are reasons why second generation youth feel the need to have an arranged marriage, factors such as:
Reputation- of the family.
Vocation- the more prestigious, the better.
Wealth/Occupation- being able to provide in the future and having a well respected job
Appearance- height and color are the main traits to consider.
Values- traditional/ liberal.
Caste/ Religion.
Horoscope- must be compatible (this was traditionally true).
Medical- Hereditary disease is becoming an increasingly important factor

Between the early ages of 15- 19 most of participants anticipate that arranged marriages are both good and bad
Are arranged marriages good or bad?
Majority of the subjects in their 20's believe it's a bad thing
Majority of the subject's above the ages of 30 said arranged marriages are good
90% of marriages in India are arranged
60% of marriages in the world are arranged
If you are in a arranged marriage in India, and get divorced, your parents will disown you
Our survey show's how people's thoughts
change over time as they grow
Online Dating
Types of arranged marriages
Love- arranged marriages
The girl get's to choose from the grooms her parents picked, if they fall in love there married, if not she gets to pick another groom
Many matrimonial sites offer many profiles to interact with over the internet to find a suitable partner which people are calling 'arranged marriage over the internet"
Child arranged marriages
Not very common, it's where the two people getting married are chosen for each other at birth
Pure arranged marriages
Most common form of arranged marriage, where the people to be wedded are chosen by the parents
Out of all these types of arranged marriages the most common kind that is found in North America is love-arranged marriage as well as pure- arranged marriages
Second generation youth are usually more exposed to different media outlets such as the internet and creating profiles such as ones on shaadi.com
This is a difference that many traditional parents from countries such as India, Pakistan, China, or Africa have never been introduced with such a thought.
Second generation youth in Canada would find online dating better rather than the traditional arranged marriage through family because they have been opened up with the idea through the use of computers.

Arranged Marriages in Countries and Culture
Most commonly found in eastern-based cultures, including Indian, Japanese, and Chinese cultures
It was at one time equally popular in western culture, during the Elizabethan era
It was common for parents in high society to arrange marriages among their children to ensure that they maintained the economic status and bloodlines
Parents of the bride would offer their daughter to the son of a family of an equal economic status
Elizabethan Women were subservient to men, they were raised to believe their inferior to men and that men knew better
Second generation's personal opinion on arranged marriages
I personally agree with arranged marriages for these particular reasons:
The Relationship lasts longer because there is a sense of commitment
you do have a "say" in choosing your life partner
You have the opportunity to meet the person and get to know them before you marry them.
My views and opinion of Arranged Marriages
Impacts of Arranged Marriages in Society
It's seen as a negative idea
Challenges for the Future
Looking back at our survey new generations dislike the idea of arranged marriages, so in the future majority of the second generation would not want or do an arranged marriage
which can lead to forced marriages
believe that relationships are stable due to a sense of commitment
belief that marriage should stay in the same religious/ethical grouping
Canadian first generations are more liberal
School, work, friends, play, values and interests that culture is changed or reshaped
Adapting to North American norms due to societal expectations vs. the cultural expectations from first generation Canadians
North American Perception
Our views on Arranged Marriages
decrease divorce rates
change the stereotype idea of arrange marriages
We believe in the saying:
Parents know best
The reason behind it is that our whole life has been decided by our parents and they have always had our best interest, and they know us well enough to choose for us. We think that parents have experienced the world better and understand people better than we would
Reasons why we support the idea of Arranged Marriage from a second generation Canadian's perspective:
1 - Less chances of both family sides arguing (which is common nowadays)
2 - The partners know that if they fell off, they have the support of their families. And this keeps them feel safe and secure
3 -Grow to respect, love, and, devote yourself for one person in your life that will hopefully do the same
The woman's main function was to produce a male heir to leave the family legacy and inheritance to.
It not uncommon for the bride and groom to be introduced to each other on the day of their nuptials.
By Zaidi, Arshia U. Shuraydi, Muhammad
Academic journal article from Journal of Comparative Family Studies, Vol. 33, No. 4
Perceptions of Arranged Marriages by Young Pakistani Muslim Women Living in a Western Society
She explores perceived attitudes of second generation female Muslim Pakistanis towards arranged marriages
specifically attempts to assess the process of mate selection as influenced by the traditional values linked with the concept of arranged marriages
The Simpson's Video
Impacts of arranged marriages on Society
Positive Vs. Negative Portrayal of Arranged Marriages
Simpsons -Displays cartoon version of an Indian couple who have portrayed a positive role when displaying the process of marriage.
Anderson Cooper: Displays the true stories of those who have had or are planning on having an arranged marriage
Bend it Like Beckham -Displays arranged marriage in a realistic setting with both first and second generation youth.
In North America mate- selection is a self-choice system based on the factor of love
there expected to date and fall in love , then decide whether to get married or not
parental consensus aren't considered important
Western societies
Traditional societies
Do you believe the idea of arranged marriages are good or bad?
why or why not?
joint or interdependence family system is the norm
mate selection is characterized by a marriage arranged by the families of the individuals
marriage is defined as contractual agreement between two families, rather than individuals
principle of familialism and interdependent social relationships are dominant
individual's interests, needs, and happiness are considered secondary to the interests of the family and community
This type of marriage helps maintain social tradition
Everyone thinks that all arranged marriages were forced
people think there's no understanding between individuals who had an arranged marriages
Society can't accept that idea of marrying someone without
Any Questions?
Marriages are a big milestone that many of us will experience sometime in our life, whether it's earlier or later in life, we can all agree that it is a major commitment to make. We will be exploring a specific type of marriage most commonly practiced in South Asia; arranged marriage.
Must be at least 19 years old in British Columbia, Newfoundland, Nova Scotia, the Northwest Territories, and Yukon.
Must be at least 18 years old in Alberta, Manitoba, New Brunswick, Ontario, Prince Edward Island, Quebec, and Saskatchewan.

Parental consent is required for a person who is under the minimum age of marriage in their province of residence.

If you are under the age of 16, you cannot apply to immigrate to Canada by getting married to a Canadian citizen/permanent resident because the marriage is not recognized for a Canadian immigration purpose.
Legal Findings: Marriages in Canada
"I'm an Every girl, and I escaped my arranged marriage"
By: Shelly Ulaj
Date accessed: 12/01/2013
Article from: theeverygirl.com
Married at 16 and moved to Los Angeles
Explains the Albanian norms
Two reasons as to why she refused to not marry
Realized there was no commonality
Marriage last 9 years
Fled in 2007
Became CEO and founder of women empowered on Novemeber, 2nd, 2008
Break down of the article:
Full transcript