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The Question Behind the Question

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by

Robin Popp

on 25 August 2016

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Transcript of The Question Behind the Question

The Question Behind the Question
The Question Behind the Question
QBQ is about making better choices in the moment by asking better questions.

Why do we have to go through all this change?
Who made this scheduling mess?
When will the parking situation improve?
Correct Questions
How do I adjust to all this change?
What can I do with this scheduling?
How will I solve this parking situation?
The Question Behind the Question
What to Really Ask Yourself to Eliminate Blaming, Complaining, and Procrastinating
QBQ
The Complainer
"poor poor me"

What to Really Ask Yourself to Eliminate Blame, Complaining, and Procrastination
John G. Miller
Incorrect Questions
Why = complaining
Who = blaming
When = procrastinating
Poor me
They should.
It must.
Not my job
You have to.
No none told me.
Indicate a lack of
personal responsibility.
QBQ is about being personally accountable.
John G. Miller
Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change.
courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Why
don't you give me more of your time?
Why

is this so complicated?
Why

is this happening to me?
Why

am I helpless?
complaining = the victim role = stress
The Procrastinator
"but, I don't have a choice"
The Blamer
"not me, I didn't do it"
Who

made the mistake?
Who
started it?
Who
can I blame?
blaming = the accuser role = hostility
When
will there be time?
When
will expenses go down?
When
can someone do it?
When
will I get break?
procrastination = excuses = failure
Indicate
personal accountability
I'll try to work through this.
Answers are in the questions = personal power
I could...
I will...
I'll find out.
I'm letting it go.
I'll get some options.
helplessness
depression
problem solving
growth
empowerment
What to Really Ask Yourself to
Eliminate Blame, Complaining,
and Procrastination
John G.Miller
Begin questions with "how" and "what".
How

can I spend more time with my friend?
How
could I approach this complicated system?
What
will I do to become more self-reliant?

From Complainer to Hero
How will
I
adapt to this situation and still be true to
myself
?
What can
I
do to solve the problem?
What can
I
do to
own
the situation?
I can change me.
From Procrastinator to Doer
I'll be the hero of my life.
Put action in the questions.
How
will
I
adapt
to this change?
What
can
I
do

to
solve
this problem?
What
could
I
do
to
find
the information How
can
I
make
a decision?
I'll evaluate the situation and make an action plan.
From Blamer to Owner
Put I in the questions.
http://qbq.com/5-consequences-victim-thinking/
http://qbq.com/the-13-costs-of-blame/
Full transcript