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O.C. Essay Workshop

Kristin Bond

on 30 March 2010

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Transcript of Moments...

Significant Moments 1. important; of consequence.

2. having or expressing a meaning 1. an indefinitely short period of time; instant

2. importance or consequence The teenager threw herself on her bed and sobbed into her pillow until she fell asleep. The girl cried a lot. This sentence only "tells" the reader what is going on, it needs to show. Let's look at how it could be changed... It is important to have your reader "feel" what the protagonist is feeling. This shows that you have the ability to "engage" your reader... this is necessary to do on the provincial exam!! YUCK!!! Now it is your turn... Choose one of the following "telling" sentences and change it to "show" what is happening. Mark was too shy
to talk to Alice. Molly was surprised
to see her mother. Stella was sick after eating dinner. Let's take it one step further...
Choose one of the following pictures to write a paragraph about.
Make sure that you "show,show,show".
Make sure it is first person and present tense.
What are they thinking and feeling at the precise moment of the picture? You do not have weeks and weeks to write an O.C Essay on the provincial exam.
You have about 1 hour.
Therefore, you need to be able to demonstrate your ability to write coherently and your ability to develop a topic in a short amount of time.
One way to do this is to focus in on "moments"... how do you do this??
SHOW, don't TELL!!!
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