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Kimberly Javier

on 14 June 2013

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"...I can't keep up. Everyone I know owns an Hermes Birkin, a Classic Chanel, a Rolex watch for the day, another for the night and a Bulgari for the gym. There's always a trend coming up and I have to get it because...I mean I have to, everyone has it! No one will like me if I don't have it and I have to fit in. My husband is getting more and more stressed because of this issue because I'm always spending to fit in. He always tries to offer another Rolex or Hermes that does- in fact- look better on me but no one has it so- EW. He doesn't understand how hard it is to be a woman. "

Please help,
Hermes Lover

Hermes Lover,

You will soon get very sick of conforming to your surroundings and trying to hard to fit in. Sit back and relax. Buying everything puts you down as a person if anything and degrades your personality and your being. Push out of the boundaries taht you feel suppressed by and be yourself! If your husband wants to buy you another Hermes or a Dior if anything, let him buy it and strut it! Be yourself and trust me, people like leaders much more than followers.
"It's that time of the year again! Music festival season! While I fully enjoy attending each of these festivals it can at times be a financial burden. My friends and I have been talking about going to Coachella for the past few months and I've been really anticipating it. Unfortunately I work two jobs and my hours aren't what they used to be. I'm able to pay all my bills and other necessary financial needs but my leisurely spending has been brought down to a bare minimum. Coachella is a month away and my friends are asking me every day if I asked for the time off at work and how we are planning our trip. I live in San Francisco and a trip to a music festival hours away is going to be expensive but I've already been discussing it with my friends. Should I go and have a great time with my friends and possibly break the bank or possibly deny myself the best weekend and save money?"

Girls Just Want To Have Fun
Dear Girls Just Want To Have Fun,

Who doesn't love a weekend get away that is a complete guaranteed good time? Spoiler alert! We all do. Now how many of us are really able to attend every single best time of our lives event whenever they come up? Not as many hands raised for that question. We all want to go out and have a great time. While we all want to do these things, we all simply cannot do everything. What are your hierarchy of needs? Would you rather dance the night away under the desert night sky but not be able to pay your rent on your return home or grim and bear it and simply be honest with your friends and respectfully say you can't make it this time. We have all been there. Our inner self says yes, but our responsible side says dinner on the table is by far more important than a weekend getaway. You shouldn't feel pressured by your friends. If they are truly your friends they will understand and take a rain check. Don't worry, there's always Coachella 2014!
"My best friend has been struggling with her latest relationship for the past few months. While I'm always there to do my best friend duties and lend an open ear to her it's become such a burden and time consuming to listen to the same problems over and over again with the same enthusiasm as the first time. I've been through the same problems in my relationship and was able to solve my problems and move on to better enjoy my relationship. Why is it that no matter how many times I give her the solution to her relationship woes she doesn't listen to my words of advice if she asks for them?"

Annoyed and Over It
Dear Annoyed and Over it,

While it's great to hear your willing to consistently offer an open ear, have you ever considered taht maybe your solution to your relationship problems doesn't work for everybody? it's understandable that after hearing about her arguing with her boyfriend about money issues for the 25th time can be somewhat grueling, maybe offer a solution that best suits her lifestyle. Unfortunately, not everybody's relationships are all the same. Communication is key, are you really listening to her inner questions or are you simply offering an answer that you know works for you? Take the time and really listen to her and better help her find a solution that caters to her needs.
"People are constantly persuading me in my company to buy the new Android S4 because it has a faster processer, etc. but I want to stick to my iPhone 3. I've been using Apple for so long and I'm comfortable with it! But there are just too many changes in technology and I can't and won't catch up. Yet they all make fun of me."

Please help,
Frustrated Woman
Dear Frustrated Woman,

The world is constantly changing and you have to eventually adjust to these changes. Take the time to look into the Android and other products, stop rejecting and resisting! There is no harm in changing, go for it!
"Smoking is part of fashion. C'mon, in all the social editorials models and designers are all smoking in the parties and to stay thin of course! My partner keeps talking me into stopping but why would I? What, I'll stop when I want to one day. How can I shut her up?"

Fashionable Smoker
Dear Fashionable Smoker,

You don't have to smoke to be fashionable. You're lying to yourself when you say you can stop anytime you want to because smoking is a habit. An addictive habit that you probably can't control by now. Take care of yourself and your surroundings and stop!
"Earlier this year I gave up on the dating game and accepted the fact that long romantic nights were to possible forever shared with my laptop, cat and latest work project. As fate would have it, as soon as I accepted this somewhat dim future, I met the man that truly sparks my interest. I suppose sometimes it just happens that way. While he sparks my interest, he is truly not my type. I prefer my men tall, dark and handsome. He's short, pale, decent looking and younger than me. We have somewhat known each other through mutual friends for quite somet ime but I clearly never saw potential with him. He works manual labor and fully believes once the clock hits 5 that " it's five o'clock somewhere". I work in an office and don't believe teh work ends once I leave the office. He dresses for comfort and I dress to impress. While he has sparked my interest, could we ever truly be? His age is definitely an issue. What could a younger man really know about older women? What kind of reaction would I receive from my friends and family? I love a good steak dinner and he's content with a sandwich from Subway. Clearly his world and mine are complete opposites. Could a man like him ever adhere to my standards of life and lead to a successful relationship?"

He's Just Not My Type
Dear He's Just Not My Type,

He has made enough of an impact on you for you to ask my advice but your questioning him as a viable dating option because he does not fit your standards? Before we continue any further it sounds like you have some serious road blocks in your way of thinking. Simply because he does not work in the same environment as you, or dress like you doesn't mean that he is simply out of the question. Have you ever thought that if you two share mutual friends that clearly you might have more things in common than the material items you catch at first glance. While first impressions are vital they are not always the final decision in life's choices. Look beyond his age, employment and the way he dresses. You could be losing out on a great thing because you can't get past your materialistic way of thinking. Live a little and allow people the opportunity to show you things you never could have seen at first glance. Besides nobody wants to be the creepy cat lady when they're older. Get out there and give that man a chance!
The It List

Where You Should Be Thursday through Sunday,
Coast to Coast

Juliet Supper Club
539 W. 21st St.
New York, NY 10011
It's been a long week at work, what better way to enjoy the weekend by celebrating with Girl's Night out? If dinner and a show is your idea of fun, Juliet Supper Club offers Mediterranean cuisine during their dining hours and then turns into a club for you and your friends to dance the night away. All the while listening to the hottest deejays in New York.

40 W 57th St
New York, NY 10019
If a night out on the dance floor isn’t your idea of the perfect weekend, Nobu might be just right.
Nobu offers great sushi created by celebrity chef Nobuyuki Matsuhisa. You and your friends can enjoy a drink in this lounge atmosphere and maybe even dine next to a celebrity in this famed restaurant.

9081 Santa Monica Blvd
West Hollywood, CA 90069
(310) 276-6168
Enjoy a night out in LA and listen to the biggest acts out now or take in an up and coming band. The Troubadour has long been the place to be if you love live music. Relax and experience the laid back scene in the heart of Hollywood.

Arclight Cinema
6360 W. Sunset Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90028
If you have been dieing to catch the latest movie, Arclight is the place to be. Catch the latest blockbuster hit while you sit in lounge seats and savor the best drinks their full bar has to offer. A movie and glass of wine is the perfect ending to an exciting weekend.

"Style is a way to say who you are without having to speak." Rachel Zoe [Smith]
"The girls are anorexic. Before, the girls were naturally slim. Girls who were round and fulsome didn't starve themselves into the right...physique."

Lauren Hutton
"Nate: [to Andy] You used to make fun of the Runway girls, now you're one of them!"
"I'm seeing a push away from that stripper heel. It's about something much more ladylike, pointy toes, curved heels, more delicate."

Stacy London
Lauren Bush Lauren is Making a Name for Herself

In Bee-Shyuan Chang's article, Lauren Bush Lauren, wife of David Lauren, daughter-in-law of Ralph Lauren as well as granddaughter of George H.W. Bush and niece of George W. Bush, has always had a life set in the public eye. While growing up with a normal childhood in Texas, moving to New York put her in the spotlight. Her exposure as a child to soup kitchens and shelters gave her insight into those that were less fortunate than her. After graduating from Princeton she started a philanthropic program called Feed Projects, where proceeds went to schools through the help of UNICEF and the UN World Food Programme. While in NY she was introduced to her now husband, David Lauren, with the help of Dylan Lauren, sister to David. This marriage increased the momentum of exposure she received being both a Bush and now a Lauren. Since being married, she has only increased her philanthropic work collaborating with Target to produce goods with proceeds benefiting Feed America. She also works with her mother, Sharon Bush, on Teddy Share where sales benefit charities focused on children’s causes. With all of this entrepreneurial experience Lauren plans on continuing it with the rapid growth of Feed as well as building a lifestyle brand. With all of this exposure she still limits her public events and outings to try and live as normal a lifestyle as possible. She considers both the Bushes and Laurens “public but private” and plans to continue that in her own life.
Volkswagen and Apple Unveil the iBeetle

In the article "Volkswagen and Apple Unveil the iBeetle", Roger Scoble introduces a first Volkswagen and Apple collaboration of a vehicle that includes the iPhone that we will see available in 2014. This vehicle is a custom of your choice, in standard and convertible version, which is designed to access every part of the iPhone using the "iBeetle app". The app comes with many different features that allows you to explore music, take pictures, navigate, read messages and connects you to your social media.
Great Expectations: The Inimitable Carey Mulligan

In the article "Great Expectations: The Inimitable Carey Mulligan" by Tom Shone, Carey Mulligan describes her connection to her character Daisy Buchanan, in The Great Gatsby. Mulligan includes Princeton University's gift to her by giving her the set of unpublished letters between Fitzgerald and his first love, who paralleled Daisy's character. Carey also dives into her biography of Zelda Fitzgerald and how "she's constantly on show, performing all the time...like a Kardashian". This Kardashian-like confidence and personal has to be re-enacted by the Sidney resident, Carey Mulligan in the all-star movie.
5 Questions for Walter Steiger

For Walter Steiger working also means enjoying life. He spends most of his time in Italy, loves it there, enjoying long lunches and taking relaxing naps. At 71 years old he is still a hard worker, creating mens and women's shoes. He will always be retired according to him, because he enjoys his work and career. Starting this Fall, Steiger will be bringing mens footwear to the US, with the women's already here in Neiman's, Barney's, Bergdorf's, etc. At first he started at wholesale with both mens and women's, then realized that he didn't need the extra money and was financially stable. But now h wants to grow within the US and become even more successful, with that being said, he hired a US General Manager, Natascia Randelli. He loves tradition, therefore keeping the inspiration simple, but always having a foot forward in doing so. He's not a fan of retrospectives, he never looks back in the past for fashion. Fashion, line and fit are the greatest key points according to Steiger into making the greatest shoe. He thinks that his mens shoes are innovative yet simple, with no crazy designs which contrasts to his approach to women's shoes. Being a family company, his intention was never to be the biggest company out there.
Aries- Trust yourself when it comes to an important decision, Aries. Do some soul- searching and figure out what is best for you. Only you know for sure.

Taurus- Be a free spirit, Taurus. That may not come naturally to you, but you could open yourself up to new opportunities and meet someone you wouldn't usually meet. But you will also enjoy yourself more.

Gemini- You could waste your time getting upset over something someone said or did recently, Gemini, but that would only hurt you. Instead pour all of that energy into making your own life better.

Cancer- Resentment leaves a bad aftertaste, Cancer. Let go of an old grudge now, and you will find it much easier to stay inspired and to find new opportunities.

Leo- You cant possibly predict every single obstacle you may face or every single challenge you will need to address when it comes to a current endeavor. But if you can just relax and maintain the belief that no matter what you face you will handle it perfectly well, then you will handle it all perfectly well!

Virgo- Your words are very powerful, Virgo, because they go out into the world and they do your bidding for you. That's why its very important to be mindful of everything you say. Think of your words as angels, and send them out to get you what you want and need.
Fashion has always been a large aspect of life and is increasingly growing as a result of modern-day media. Icons such as Marilyn Monroe, Twiggy and Kate Moss were illuminated as the ‘ideal’ female body at a certain period, and with the Internet, hand-held apps on electronic devices, and publications at most daily destinations such as the supermarkets and pharmacies; fashion awareness is successfully expanding exponentially today. On the other hand, average consumers are increasingly feeling insecure and degraded as these images are becoming more and more publicized, but the truth of it is, these models aren’t the ideal female body and are creating many backlashes in society. I strongly believe that for the benefit of the Fashion Industry, they should take a step in publicizing more realistic, natural figures.

Primarily, magazine ads and pictures are how the fashion industry (you), target the audience (us), that’s a common understanding. However, providing images of waiflike models with flawless airbrushed skin (Womens Studies RSS) is subliminally, or very obviously affecting women of all ages, causing them to believe that this is the ideal image they should try to achieve. Not only is it affecting consumers, but also affecting owner’s of large fashion labels to create restrictions in clothing sizes. One particular example is with the teen-targeted casual wear brand known as ‘Abercrombie and Fitch’ referred to as ‘A & F’. According to the New York Daily News, the company’s CEO, Mike Jeffries made insensitive comments about their target customer, wanting it to be purchased by only “cool kids” not for “unpopular”, one with a “great attitude and a lot of friends”. He made this controversial statement after he restricted the sizes to only up to a size L, or a size 10; then stated “a lot of people don’t belong in our clothes” (Stylenews). Now how do you think all the high school girls and boys or even mothers and fathers feel when they can no longer shop at Abercrombie? The anti-Abercrombie people are becoming larger and larger and creating blogs such as “Attractive and Fat” where Blogger Jes Baker modeled a size large T-shirt for A&F in a mock photo shoot to prove that “cool kids” come in all shapes and sizes (Stebner). The blogger also addressed the CEO by writing “The only thing you’ve done through your comments is reinforce the unoriginal concept that fat women are social failures, valueless and undesirable. Your apology doesn’t change this” (Stebner), which really emphasizes how personal fashion became and how stigmatized these females feel as a result of these social restrictions created in the fashion industry.
However, a handful of fashion leaders have opposing opinions about what is and isn’t “acceptable” in society and are slowly altering what is published to the public. Mario Testino, a very highly sought fashion photographer is one of them. “Mario Testino…is the only photographer with a knowledge of the market for fashion which nobody else has,” Versace Group Creative Director Donatella Versace told CNN (CNN), and it is himself who believes that anorexic-looking models aren’t an appropriate “ideal” for the public. He states, “ We are in a business to sell clothes… I don’t think that clothes look good on a skeleton”(CNN), which, as one of the most famous and highly paid photographer’s in the fashion industry, who’s images have been in almost or all international Vogue issues, and who has his own museums in Europe; is a strong opinion to say to the public. On the contrary, due to the lack of positive body image in the new generations of girls, fashion labels too are making a few changes. Dove, the large company for sanitary products have launched ad campaigns featuring ‘real sized women’ (Jones). In essence, in reference to the Dove website, their ‘vision’ is: “Imagine a world where beauty is a source of confidence, not anxiety. Dove is committed to building positive self-esteem and inspiring all women and girls to reach their full potential – but we need your help”. A company as such has targeted ‘real women’ and is now set apart from the “unhealthy message that [one] must be physically “perfect” in order to be “loved” (Bordo 8). In addition, popular clothing lines such as Forever 21, in 2009, launched a plus size line called Faith 21 where they offer the same clothes in plus sizes (Magsaysay). With these steps being taken in a positive direction, eventually a positive body image will be portrayed to women everywhere and women will learn to be more accepting of their bodies and not to expect perfection or any defeats to be unacceptable in society.
As a small handful of companies and fashion leaders are taking action in this case, other companies have been campaigning and/or promoting ‘real’ and ‘natural’ women all from the beginning. American Apparel, founded in 1989 is clothing manufacturer, wholesaler and retailer that designs, advertises and markets on it’s own located in the United States. It’s best known for making basic, solid-color knit clothing such as T-shirts and underwear but recently branched out into leggings, tank tops, dresses, and other simple casual-wear. Unlike other large distributing clothing brands, American Apparel till this day “sets industry standards of social and environmental responsibility in the workplace while promoting natural beauty, community involvement and sustainability”(Gronowski). Nonetheless the models that they’re publicizing today whether over the Internet or in their catalogs all have realistic female features such as stretch marks or cellulite, which makes the message of American Apparel so strong as they deviate from the usual perfected model type seen anywhere else. Another example is the high-end, high-quality athletic wear and supplier brand: Lululemon Athletica. Featured on their website is a blog that is updated daily, mostly with posts from yoga athletes. Laura, a yoga instructor from the “love your body” blog page wrote “There’s no size restriction on beauty and confidence… Show off your muscles, your curves. Wear that sports bra and those short shorts. Don’t look to others for approval. Be the confidence you’re searching for. Love your body”; that is the type of message that will popularize your brand. That is the type of message that will make people love the industry.
My intentions aren’t to state ridiculous statements and restrictions made in the industry that are making people counterattack the industry, but to simply suggest methods where we all, as one, can make the Fashion Industry much bigger and more successful in a positive, real way. Although I am a monthly buyer of most publications, I usually feel worse about myself after I put the magazine down and start thinking about all the flaws that make me “imperfect” or “unacceptable”, and that is the reason why many women don’t even purchase them as a result. Grasp this daily dilemma and change it slightly, keep the wrinkles or the “displaced” freckle on the model; she’s beautiful. After all, we are in this world to be happy and live our lives loving surroundings, and ourselves and through this, the fashion industry can help change the world.
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