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Why Manners Matter

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by

Joe LeFever

on 28 March 2014

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Transcript of Why Manners Matter

Manners in Today's Workforce
Informality in the Workplace
Originated with the American Democratic belief that every one is equally valuable.
Becoming more common in the workplace
These environments are more open and trusting
Workers are more comfortable and creative (“Be Themselves”)
Does Business Need More Etiquette?
Leaders urge people to act as themselves and break free from form and tradition
Etiquette: to help us deal with the extremeness of human’s emotions in a way that everyone can tolerate
Is Etiquette In Trouble at the Workplace?
“I want to be me” Movement
No distinction between your business life and your personal life.
People treat co workers as friends and family which can lead to disaster
Have to make laws for people to obey.

YES!
Is Etiquette in Trouble at the Workplace?
Relationships at the Workplace
We are often too distant with co workers to be able to resolve problems on personal level
Set formal limits or boundaries on relationships
Talking About Money
- Talking about money at work is only vulgar if it gets too personal
-Talking to the boss about money
- Employees gifts
Entertainment In the Workplace
According to Miss Manners, asking workers to give up their evenings/weekends for work without pay is a terrible imposition
Be mindful socializing appropriately out of the office.
Rudeness In the Workplace
If you want to be rude to a customer/co-worker the only way to do it is to be extremely polite

Learning the Rules
Basic principle behind Etiquette: Thinking from the other person’s point of view
Have to Learn this principle as a child
“It is important to not confuse learning etiquette with learning morals”
Not true for business world
If you’re a businessperson trying to persuade somebody, then you benefit from understanding the other person’s point of view.
What is So Bad About American Etiquette?
We don’t lack manners, we just have a lot of rude people like every other country!
Japan
Britain
For Americans, our biggest violation of etiquette is exaggeration.
Important to distinguish between the theory and the practice of etiquette
In theory, America has the best code of manners the world has ever seen but that is because it is based on respect for the individual no matter the gender, race, ethnicity, age…etc.
Why Manners Matter
Peter Drucker
The Father of Modern Management
Authored books and articles management education and proper employee training
"Manners are the lubricating oil of an organization"
Knowing
proper manners
Proper manners include using:
"Please" and "Thank You"
Proper name and title
Always avoid using:
Verbal outbursts
A condescending attitude
Physical threats
Do Bad Manners Take a Toll on the Workplace?
YES!
One in five employees have bad experiences
Negative work environments can cause psychological distress and
poor physical health
Report signs of bad manners amongst
co-workers
Signs of Bad Manners
Interrupting while speaking
Derogatory remarks
Withholding information
Disparaging others' ideas
People Skills Trump Talent
Challenges of
Interpersonal Skills
Quiz
Bad manners rub people raw and leave permanent relationship scars
They can create breakdowns in the teamwork, communication,
and collaboration
Important to implement standards of "acceptable and unacceptable"

Civility is Crucial
Marshall Goldsmith points out that "people skills," more than smarts or technical talents, frequently "make the difference in how high you go" in your career.
Speaking when angry
Being overly negative
Making excuses
Claiming undeserved credit
Not listening well
Failing to express gratitude
#1. The only way you should be rude to someone in the workplace is to be....

A. overly aggressive
B. talking behind their backs
C.overly nice and polite
D.Not talk to them
#2. Is incivility in the workplace.....

A. Increasing
B. Decreasing
C. Staying about the same

C. overly nice and polite
Increasing
#3. Which of these is considered rude?

A. Shaking hands with a new acquaintance
B. Covering mouth when yawning
C. Farting
D. Opening the door for someone else

C. Farting
#4.What is an appropriate amount of drinks to have when socializing with co-workers?

A. 1 to 3
B. 5 to 7
C. 10 or more
A. 1 to 3
#5. What is a good way for managers to promote civility amongst their employees?

A. Yelling at them
B. Throwing parties every Friday
C. Leading by example
D. Not providing feedback
C. Leading by example
Questions?
Full transcript