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The Levels of Filipino Interaction
Transcript of The Levels of Filipino Interaction
Man is social being. It is within our nature as human being to interact with one another as we continue to face life's journeys together. By socializing with other people, we are able to share our experiences with them, as learn from their own experiences by their sharing. It is through these moments of social interaction that we forge relationship -relationship that help us go through life's ups and downs.
Pakikipagkapwa presumes the idea that the person we are interacting with is are equal, regardless of his/her status or class in society. Being equals, we are exepected to treat this person with respect and dignity that we would want for our selves
What makes 'pakikipagkapwa' so difficult?
When it is viewed as a simple way of interacting with others, it seems quite easy. But since it comes from the root word KAPWA, which unifies the self with other people, PAKIKIPAGKAPWA carries with it a deeper meaning that just engaging in social interaction.
The levels and modes of Social Interaction (pakikipagkapwa)
There are 8 levels and modes of pakikipagkapwa
'The heart of the person before you is a mirror. See there your own form'
- Shinto Saying
What is 'pakikipagkapwa'
Pakikipagkapwa is much deeper and profound in its implication. It is also means accepting and dealing with other person as an equal. The company president and the clerk in an office may not have an equal role but Filipinos way demand and implements the idea that they treat one another as fellow human being (kapwa tao)
We have learned in the previous lesson the idea of KAPWA or the unity of the self and others. In this lesson, we shall explore the Filipino value of PAKIKIPAGKAPWAAN. How can we achieve such a state of oneness with others?
suppose that your family moves in to a new neighborhood. You, of course will go through the process of social interaction from the bottom.
Here is how the levels of pakikipagkapwa take place in your interaction with your new neighborhood.
At first, you are in the OUTSIDE CATEGORY. This simply means that you still consider your next -door neighbors as outside (ibang tao) in as much as they consider you as an outsider too.
*You first encounter with your neighbor
may perhaps happen when you start doing your chores. When you need to buy something from the neighborhood sarisari storeyou get interact with the seller in the lowest form social interaction pakikitungo. Your interaction with the seller is said to be at the levels of amenities- being civil with him/her in order to get your transaction done.
*Moving up a notch, we need to have a longer interaction with them to get PAKIKISALAMUHA. This levels comprises a longer time for conversation, particularly introduction and certain amounts of "small talk". When a neighbor visits your house to introduce himself/herself, you of course invite him/her into your living room to talk about basic things such as names, common family lineage, place of origin, school and the likes.
" A friend to all is a friend to none"
*It is natural to every one to be really close only to a select few. We cannot be close or "one with everyone that we meet.
*Our levels of interaction depends on the common interests and experiences that we are able to share with a particular person. We just cannot force our selves to be friendly or become palagay ng loob to every one. Not every one reaches the "one of us" levels in our pakikipagkapwa scale. This may be the very reason why it is important for us to know whom we want within our inner circles
* When you get invited to have a lunch
or dinner at your neighborhood's house, we can say that you may have crossed the line of PAKIKILAHOK.
*PAKIKIBAGAY implies a certain level of conforming to other people.
*The highest level of PAKIKIKAPWA possible for an outsider is PAKIKISAMA. AS compared with PAKIKIbAYAY, PAKIKISAMA takes conformity one step further by not only following another person's lead, but also placing what other people want over your own preference.
Pakikisama is the last step taken in social interaction before you are considered part of the category "one of us" (hindi ibang tao). The last three levels of pakikikapwa already imply that you are no longer considered as an outsider (hindi ka na iba sa amin). These three all fall in the One-of-us-Category.
What does it mean when we say that
if a person is PALAGAY NG LOOb (having a calmor relaxed psyche) with another? When two people are in the level of PAKIKIPAGPALAGAYANG LOOB, they are at peace with each other. Whenever they are together they can be themselves because of mutual trust in each other You have already built rapport and a level of understanding which allows you to accept each other as you are.
Similar to the previous level of PAKIKILAHOK, PAKIKISANGKOT is a level wherein you join in another person's activities, no longer as an outsider, but as a friend. This entails a conscious decision on your part to be actively involved with another person's life(kasangkot ka na sa buhay niya). Through your involvement with each other's endeavors, you deepen your relationship by way of these new interests, activities and other experiences that you share.