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Interpersonal Comm- Cha 11: Using Interpersonal Influence
Transcript of Interpersonal Comm- Cha 11: Using Interpersonal Influence
Using Interpersonal Influence
– perception that a person can harm us physically or psychologically
– perception that a person can provide monetary, physical, or psychological benefits
– power derived from being elected, selected, or holding a position of influence
– power derived from having knowledge that partner does not
– power derived from the respect and admiration of others
power is not inherently good nor bad
power exists within all relationships
the person with more power can make & break the rules for the relationship
power = privilege; operates on cultural an societal levels (race, gender, sexual orientation, sexual identity, religion, education, economic status, physical appearance, etc)
Elaboration Likelihood Model
Theory that people will use mental shortcuts or critical thinking skills when processing persuasive messages
Six heuristics guide behavior:
Critical thinking skills
We use when:
The issue is important
We feel capable of analyzing and understanding the issue
repay in kind
do what others do (all the cool kids are doing it)
do what your friends do
do what the experts advice
get what is in short supply
Persuasive Appeals: Extensive
Quality of the reasoning
simple statements of belief or opinion
statements that provide the basis or cause for some belief or action
are well supported
are meaningful to the person you are trying to persuade
The extent to which the target believes the speaker's:
perception that the speaker is well qualified to provide accurate & reliable information
person seems to be: dependable, honest, keeping promises, acting for the good of others
combination of: congeniality, warmth, attractiveness, friendliness
Appeals to emotions
Emotions are often the driving force behind actions.
Messages motivate others to act.
Effectiveness depends on mood/attitude of partner and word choice.
Rights & Expectations
Concealing feelings rather than voicing rights and expectations
Name-calling, threatening, judging, faultfinding
Different from argumentativeness:
defending our own ideas or attacking the reasoning of others while giving them respect
messages indirectly express hostility (stubbornness, unresponsiveness, etc.)
We may not believe we have rights
Fear that complaining will damage relationship
Lack social skills to stand up for ourselves
Declaring and defending personal rights/expectations in clear, direct, and honest manner while respecting the rights of others
Focuses on interests of both parties
Being assertive involves risk that you will be perceived as aggressive.
Assertive Message Skills
Make “I” statements.
Describe behavior and feelings.
Maintain regular eye contact and a self-confident posture.
Use a firm but pleasant tone of voice.
Be sensitive to the face needs of others
Making a Complaint
Begin by doing facework.
Assume the violation was unintentional.
Describe how your rights/expectations were violated.
Describe how you feel about what has happened.
Invite the person to comment on or paraphrase what you said.
Making a Request
Assume that your partner is willing to change behavior if he or she understands the problem.
Politely but directly describe what you want the other person to do.
Describe how the behavior violates your rights/expectations.
Offer an alternative to your partner’s unacceptable behavior.
Assume compliance and thank him or her.
Refusing a Request
Directly own that you are not willing to agree to the request.
State a generalized reason for your refusal, but don’t feel obligated to disclose private thoughts.
When possible, offer an alternative.
Assertive behavior is practiced primarily in Western cultures.
Asian cultures are less likely to engage in assertiveness in an effort to maintain harmony.
In Latin and Hispanic societies the concept of “machismo” often guides male behavior that
goes beyond assertiveness.
You need to see The Kings Speech
It portrays the humanness of a real historical person.
It show a special relationship between two men of unequal class and power
Colin ordered his food over twenty minutes ago. The people at the two tables seated after him have already eaten and left. Colin decides to complain, saying "Excuse me. I can see that things are really busy, but I ordered my food about twenty minutes ago, and two tables of people who ordered after me have come and gone. I expected that our food would be served in order. I'm really annoyed. Do you understand my position?"
Situation: You have two friends over to hang out. While you are watching a movie, one of them lights a cigarette. You are in the dorms and smoking is banned.
Request: "Nick, please put your cigarette out. You probably forgot that dorms are non-smoking areas. I could get kicked out and I don't want my places and clothes to smell. Wen you need to smoke, I'll pause the movie and you can go outside. Thanks for understanding."
Refusing a Request
Coworker: "Would you take my shift next Friday? I'd really appreciate it."
You: "Thanks for offering it to me, but sorry, I already have plans. Check with Heather, though, when she comes in. I think she was interested in picking up shifts."
What type of power is in each picture?
What persuasive strategies are being used?
Groups of 3-4
Choose object and create a 2 minute infomercial using persuasive strategies
who you are targeting (audience)
how can you establish ethos (credibility)
how can you appeal to pathos (emotions)
how can you appeal to logos (logic/reasoning)
what heuristics ("rules of thumb") can you use (reciprocity, scarcity, liking, social proof/consensus, consistency)
Write out, be prepared to present