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Transcript of NJSP Yearbook
"ShreyMoney"/ "ShreyBae"/ "Shayla"
"Does Dumb Things"
"I can taste the humidity"
"I heard that marathon runners' organs fall out while they're running!"
*Shows up 10 minutes late on the first day*
*pulls out phone during Fig's class*
Gets yelled at by Fig
*Reads article that was due the day before while Fig is talking about his personal life*
Gets yelled at again by Fig
Grace Yueqing Chen
"Who's Dada? I can't find his art." and "Go Green is for helping the environment, right?
"Don't Jewish people bury the foreskin"
"JAMIE YOU'RE CRAAAAAAAZZZZYYYYYYY!"
Fig: "Are you transgender?"
Sydney: "Yes, I am!"
No L's, Just W's
"What's a clitoris? Isn't that a horror movie?"
"It's ok to take L's sometimes"
Rebecca: "That's it?"
John: "Eh, maybe $50"
"I am interested in the country of Africa"
Asked to measue 1/2 cup of water. Measures 2/3
"If you think about it, a fan is a reverse vacuum"
"God left me unfinished"
Ify: "David, you have no L quotes"
Dr.Nappie: "What is the first thing you would say to an alien?"
Injil: "I need another to reproduce"
"Wait are we meeting Fig's cousin Vinny?!"
"Look at that lil' b*tch Geric"
*Has inappropriate relations with children*
"So Aaditi, if a person loses brain function and becomes a vegetable, and I eat them, am I the ultimate vegan?"
"I want a piece of you Bido! I know I'm going to lose, but I just want a taste"
" Kayla stop touching me, you and I are not of the same kind!"
*Talks about being Vegan*
*Leaves book in a public space and expects to find it there 14 hours later....Doesn't find the book*
"I don't think I'm normal, let me go and check"
"I can taste the mystery"
"Jordon what the f*ck did you do to my bed"
Geric and his bae
Remember Group C? The group that never had class......
And the many trips to The Purple Cow?
Why is Chase in a tree?
I didn't know that this was allowed.....
Even though, at times, we were stressed and worked in excess....
NJSP 2016 Graduation
BEST TRIPLE EVER
IN HONOR OF KAYLA WANTING TO FIGHT BIDO
THE OTHER SUPPOSED "TRIPLE"
THE GRASS RIDER SQUAD
And to all those sleepless nights
We are all hoping that Kayla finds a cure for her snapchat addiction
"It's a symbol"
Wishing you all the best and much success in your future endeavors!
Your Senior Editors: Ify White-Thorpe & Veronica Bido with special thanks to Rebecca Welch and Kayla Stewart
Beggar Ify has been upgraded to REVEREND IFY
"Every time I tried to go running"
Jamie, You're CRAZZZZZYYYYY!
The Gay Boys
Thank You for an Amazing Summer!- Activities Comity
For those I have taken pictures of sleeping, Karma is a bitch and I was betrayed by my own blood
"The matrix does not exist Ify and Sean I don't play for your team."
Biggest Lowkey Savage
*play the video*
Evidence to prove that Ify is guilty by association
*Play the video*
*runs off on the beach in search of pokemon*
Our very own male Alicia Keys
(watch the video!)
Watch them Dab!
"The mind makes it real"
(Watch Ify prove that she is NOT Neo and we're NOT in the Matrix)
Let's not forget about the good times with great people
Jordon or the L King?
Most Likely to be on Worldstar
He's always ready to wall twerk, shake his hips, (because his hips don't lie) or hold an impromptu dance class. Aayush drops everything and *cue Drake's hotline bling dance* starts dancing at the sound of 'One Dance'.
Kayla, also known as the most likely to square up, but not throw hands, can usually be caught saying, "I want a piece of you Bido, I know I'm going to lose, but I just want a taste!" While Kayla may appear weak, she is the reigning Chicken Fight Champion; clearly, she can only fight in water.
The Actual Triplets
The Honorary Triplets
Eric thinks he can throw hands, but truthfully he cannot. He can usually be found wrestling with Jordon (you already know who won those fights). His alter ego, Geric, enjoys the physical contact and loves to take part in such activity ;)
Their height gives them an advantage, they're like reverse sour patch kids: sweet then sour. Amelia smiles when she comes after you so you don't know whether to be happy or insulted. Garz takes part in every savage event possible, but is too slick to be convicted of any crimes. He's always commenting just loud enough so you hear but aren't sure if you did. And if you didn't know, well now you do.
MOST LIKELY TO GET ARRESTED
MOST LIKELY TO HAVE A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN
MOST SELF ABSORBED
Most likely to ruin their lives playing Pokémon Go
Most likely to start a cult
Person who has the least amount of chill
ARY AND MAYA
ERIC AND SEAN
Most likely to live forever:
Most likely to end up in MOMA
Most likely to play at Carnegie Hall (if it hasn’t happened already):
Most likely to dominate the world:
Most likely to be caught feeling calves:
Most likely to be eating chickpeas
Most likely to destroy the world in an experiment gone wrong
Most likely to wander off into the woods
Becky Boo, aka the plug, can usually be caught throwing blatant shade at every living being. She enjoys framing people for pranks and even though shes scrawny, she can throw hands. (FYI to the cops, hit her in the back of her right knee, that's her tree branch, twig like, toothpick-ish weak leg). Becky thinks she's slick, but she's not. Becky would most likely be arrested for being rude to a cop.
Chase would probably catch a charge for crossing the line of heroin. While Chase appears innocent -the pink outfit is deceiving- he is most likely to be arrested for public nudity induced by drunkenness. Chase enjoys taking part in illegal activity and playing on the innocence associated with tap dance to get himself out of sticky situations.
Collin should probably be instituted in a mental facility because he gets loony after 2 a.m. Yet, he is also brilliant and plays multiple instruments( all self taught) Collin is also the founder of the Church of Cuck and has miraculously garnered support and loyal followers who are also mentally deranged. Collin was once recorded saying, "God left me unfinished"; we agree Collin.
If your having a bad day, Tasos will surely turn that frown upside down by simply saying "Mornin" at 9:30 p.m.
Shahin's facial expressions will literally have you rolling on the floor laughing. Not once did we ever witness her complain or even frown. She has such a positive outlook on life. Not only is she the friendliest, but the nicest as well. Go Shahin!
Grace has absolutely no chill whatsoever. You will always know exactly what she is thinking. Whether it be about Jewish Foreskin, or Black People Hair. It's cool though, because she's genuinely curious. Grace will literally have you contemplating her sanity and after she makes her chill-less statements, she smiles. Grace takes being blunt to a new level. Quote: "Fig, you're from Mexico, so you understand (xy&z about oppression)."Oh and if you didn't know, China made paper.
Yooooo Justin! Bruh, this kid has no chill whatsoever, like he will make you wonder if he has any type of filter in his perverted mind. Justin enjoys his "fun time" with his "lil bitch Geric." Justin frequently talks about people's asses, and also has restraining orders beings issued against him due to his lack of chill. No one is really sure as to how and why Jordon put up with him, since he's so CRAAZZZYYYY (like Jamie).
Geric and Sean could not live without each other. They enjoy booty-specifically each others- and yearn to be in the presence of each others ass' again. Sean once commented on his sidepiece's (Justin's) instagram saying, "Gonna come to your house tonight to smash your booty." Geric is Seans little bitch and does as his daddy says.
They're actually gay and enjoy eating ass on the daily in the showers.
Ellie, aka mom (or Jess, or Mari-Jess), is super careful about everything. She literally is Mary Poppins, she carries everything in her bag from tide to go, bandaids, a treasure map, Fig's cousin Vinny, and of course detached feet too appease her foot fetish.
Andrew literally goes on 500 million mile runs everyday. He eats super healthy to accompany his workout regime and somehow manages to maintain his sanity. Surprisingly, he is not a vegan!
Somehow, Laura can "taste the mystery". Laura is an idealist and has such a positive outlook on life. She's kind of like the female version of Peter Pan. Laura would most likely venture into the woods to simply enjoy nature, but Laura, at times, is a bit too optimistic and unfortunately, the woods aren't meant for idealists.
Amaan is smart, and he knows it. But he's 21st century smart, not necessarily caveman smart. Amaan, please stay out of the woods!
Best Dressed: Girls
Best Dressed: Guys
Class and game with Aayush who always has it together
Professional Bido with Madre Ify and Classy Rachel
CLASS REP SPEECHES
SWEET DREAMS Everybody
THIS IS NOT GOODBYE
Jenna is amazing in every way, from her beautiful voice, endless kindness, she is the person you not only want but need in your life. Yet, she does freak out as seen by her famous statements, "What is art? Is there meaning to life? What is time? Are you real? Should I take one for the team and throw myself in front of a car?"
Julie is a true artist. She has socks of all different famous paintings. She wrote a comic book and helped make the illustrations. Julie has taken no "L'S" and is always able to give an artistic painting.
David is one of the most talented people you will meet. Not only does he play multiple instruments, but he is an amazing ballon artist.
Everybody knows the triplets and all the girls know their room is the place to be. From enjoying dance parties to roommate lunch to simple conversations that last late into the night they do it all. A prank on them is a prank on all of them, though when it comes to physical fighting they tend to let Bido take one for the team except for pillows. No one has seen them fight, unlike a "married couple" that shall remain nameless. Definitely the closet roommates on the floor, the protect each others sleep patterns while also keeping their wants in mind( except that disturbing experience with someone coming into the room univited.)
Room 201: reportedly the exception to gay season on the boys floor, but we've seen Eric and Collin cuddling on Eric's bed, which has been the home of group naps. Even though Garz isn't a roommate, he spends enough time with these to two to be an honorary roommate. They show their love through brutal slaps of the neck. Garz and Collin can't make it through a day without playing Smash and even through crushing defeats, they remain friends. Plus, they formed a secret society the other triple belongs too. 3 Seems to be the magic number
While John seems like a quiet kid, you realize that he's the type A hyper competitive person yo except to find at a program like this. He's the type to kill you will kindness and then laugh as you die, but restraining what seems to be deeply seething anger for so long has to be taking its toll
These girls made sacrifices to stay looking good(with the exception of Ify who had her brother and father carry her 10 suitcases). With drawers full of jewelry and closets full of clothes, it's unlikely that they wore half of what they packed. While most people could barely roll out of bed in the morning, even with the fire alarm going off), these girls took the time to make sure that each outfit was complete
There is no picture she's not in. Drowns out others singing even though she sounds like a strangled cat. Everything she does is perfect. Refuses to speak in public without copyrighting every word. Will fake anger reading this but will secretly be happy there is a whole passage about her. So obsessed with herself that she created a fantasy world in which she is the center. (She couldn't create her own so she copied from the Matrix). Lowkey has a really big heart and is a people person.
Everyone knows that Sydney wants to be a physicist. While these are not typically the mad scientist type, we believe her drive will cause her to takes things a step to far. After all, physicists created the atomic bomb.
Due to the sometimes gross, sometimes scary food at Irwin, we all had to get creative to make it through five weeks. Some of us ordered out, went out to eat, brought food from home but some of us ate chickpeas. When it's all about gains, the protein rich chickpeas make them the perfect food to gorge on.
From day 1, Olivia had no issues saying exactly
what was on her mind. You could usually hear her and her laugh from your room while she wasn't even in the house.
All 5 weeks, Jordon has done everything as dramatically as possible. If there is any form of an insect within 100 feet, you will instantly know based on the noises that will immediately come out of Jordon's mouth and Jordon is fun to prank.
Instead of reverting to the average male look of t shirts and shorts, these guys were sure to put together each outfit with care. While many guys fall into the trap that looking nice means your boring, they were sure to distinguish themselves either by bright colors or great class and game.
Rachel is one of the smartest and kindest people in the world. She not only dazzles us with her voice, but humor( amazing puns of everything nerdy especially game of thrones) and her ability to play Pokemon go and say alive
Kevin, kevin is the happiest person you will meet. He always has a smile on his face whether its telling a heart felt story to telling dead baby jokes and scaring children. Kevin has surprising stayed alive playing pokemon go, for now
This one speaks for itself. Eric plays soccer, has gone to the gym everyday and has defined calves. You can always catch Eric touching and admiring his calves. Although there are no pictures of his calves, this one shows enough leg.
If you've ever met Bido, you would know why she's the hands down winner for this category. She does her best to make friends with everyone she meets and people tend to walk away from even a short encounter thinking they've made a special friend. As a result, she could easily gain a following. The amount of stuff she has stolen creates an army of slaves working to get it back. She's has a relentless drive towards greatness and is willing to do all the work necessary whether she takes credit or not.
Ingil uses his charming personality to persuade people to help him in his LOWKEY quest for world domination. He pretends to be innocent by saying things like, "I've never seen my parents naked", but if you listen closely, you can hear crude comments like 9/11 or remaining chuckles over Del-bend-over. He calls out the bullshit and always has something insightful to say. He is kind and respectful, the person that everyone wants as their friend. He will do great things and change the world for the better.
What NJSP does in the rain...
Least Likely to be Friends
Ify and Rebecca
Most Likely to Become Opera Singer
She may be quiet and sweet when she talks, but when she's singing, her voice fills the room
Aditya trips over or bumps into anything remotely in his way. If you need any proof, ask him about his glasses
(The video speaks for itself)
She may not say much in seminar but she is always thinking of something. She has great fresh ideas that challenge the common room.Obessed with Disney, she looks like Cinderella, has the kindest heart and is always there for you. She breaks all stereotypes and will enrich your life.
Frequently initiated conversations in seminar about the reading, without doing the reading. Arth always kept himself entertained during lectures by playing games online. Excellent multitask-er because he has mastered the art of analyzing spark notes, playing Mine Craft, and participating in seminar all at the same time.
Shreyas tried to deny the fact that he partook in Geric's gay festivities, but we have evidence that says otherwise. Due to these shenanigans, he barely got any sleep and was unable to do much of the readings, leading him to bullshit his way through seminars. Somehow, he actually sounded intellectual, as if he knew what he was talking about (with insight!). Most likely to be be yelled at by Nappie and Fig in the same day for being distracted by games on his laptop, then act like Einstein the rest of the day in order to make up for it
Claims to have taken no L's, but we beg to differ