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Habit 4: Think Win-Win

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Jen C.

on 20 May 2013

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Transcript of Habit 4: Think Win-Win

Win-Win Think Win-win Win-Lose Lose-Win aka the Doormat Syndrome is the "have your way with me, wipe your feet on me, everyone else does" way.

Lose-Win is weak because it's easy for everyone to step on you. You will find yourself setting yourself with low expectations and compromising your standards again. You'd practically be giving into peer pressure.

If you adapt it as your basic attitude toward life you'll be keeping your feelings bottled up, and it isn't healthy.

Win-Lose and Lose-Win thinking can cloud your judgement and fill you with negative feelings. Lose-Win Win-Win is when everyone can win. It's both nice and tough all in one.
-You won't step on someone and you won't let someone step on you.
-Win-win is abundant, meaning that there's success for everyone.

Characteristics of Win-win:
-Sharing the praise and recognition of something with all of those who helped you get there.
-You treat everyone the same, including the friendless and unpopular.
-You are genuinely happy for others.
-You try to find solutions that will satisfy you and everyone else.

Win-Win will give you confidence and make you happy as well as serene thoughts. Think win-win is an attitude towards life in which your mind set always says that if I can win so can you, meaning benefiting both you and others. In order to think win-win you must be able to work along with others and have the belief that everyone is equal. Habit Four Win-Lose is an attitude toward life that says that pie of success is only so big. If you get a big piece there is less for me. So I'm going to make sure I get my slice first, or that I get a bigger piece than you.

Characteristics of the Totem Pole Syndrome:
-Full of pride
-Using others for your own selfish purposes
-Trying to get ahead at the expense of another.
-Spreading rumors about someone else (putting someone down to 'build' you up).
-Always getting your way without considering the feelings of others.
-Becoming jealous/envious if something good happens to someone else. Life isn't all about competition or getting ahead of others, it's about sharing the outcomes equally. Lose-Lose "If you're going down you're coming with me, sucker!" Lose-lose usually happens when two Win-Lose people get together, because both are going to end up losing.
It can occur when someone becomes obsessed with another person in a negative way. War is lose-lose: who ever kills the most people wins right? -in the end nobody wins.
Revenge is also lose-lose. You might think that you won, but in reality you're just hurting yourself. How to Think Win-win? *Win the Private Victory First: Insecure people get jealous very easily and it will be difficult to think Win-Win because you'll be threatened by other people, which will only make it harder to be happy for their success.

Personal security is the foundation for thinking Win-win.

*Avoid the Tumor Twins: The tumor twins are competing and comparing.
Competing is healthy but it can have its positive and negative effects.
Competing can be good because it encourages us to improve, to reach and stretch out.
It can also be negative when you tie your self-worth into winning or when you use it as a way to place yourself above another.
"Two worst traits an athlete can have are a fear of failure and an inordinate desire to win, or a win-at-anycost attitude" said a famous football coach.

Comparing yourself to others is unhealthy because we're all developing differently socially, mentally, and physically.
Building your life on how to stack up compared to other is never a good start. Everyone has their own course.
Long story short stop comparing yourself because it can become an addiction.
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