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Copy of Zombies can't use commas, but you can.

A guide to mastering the comma without meeting your death.
by Shelley Engstrom on 18 October 2012

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Transcript of Copy of Zombies can't use commas, but you can.

Zombie Fred and Comma Ted Present... Comma Survival Tactics Zombie Fred has brown hair, a bloody mouth,
and mismatched eyes. He is lookin` good. Rule #1:
Use a comma to separate items in a series of three or more and one preceding AND. Fred dreams of a fresh, lovely flower to give Ted. Rule #2:
Commas replace "and" between two coordinate adjectives To start a fire, be sure not to use butterflies as kindling. Rule #3:
Use a comma after introductory words. Rule #5:
Use commas to set off appositive and parenthetical phrases Fred drank hemlock, but he survived because he was already dead. Rule #7:
A comma separates two independent clauses joined by coordinating conjunctions. Comma Ted, who likes Zombie Fred only for his
bulging eye, bought Fred a goldfish for
his deathday. Rule #8:
Use a comma to set off a clause that offers more information about the noun before it (a non-restrictive clause). Because Fred and Ted were such good friends, they went to Paris together. Rule #9:
Use a comma to separate an
dependent clause
from the independent clause
that FOLLOWS it. SO, NEVER use a comma.... Ted gets offended when people use him incorrectly. Zombie Fred, even with his blood-stained shirt,
was able to go to the ball.

Fred, for example, is a zombie. and, but, or, yet, nor, so, for to separate a verb from its subject or object before the first or after the last item in a list BEFORE:
Ted secretly likes, brains, toenails, and eyelashes for supper. AFTER: Brains, toenails, and eyelashes, are what Ted likes for supper. to separate an adjective from the noun it describes. Fred lives in a mysterious, tree with a magical, fairy. after conjunctions Fred slipped on the banana peel and, landed on his bum. after "although"
when it's a
subordinating conjunction to separate two independent clauses Preach it. A comma before AND will save you from the zombie apocalypse. Zombie Fred has and . A fresh, lovely flower. Thanks, Ted. Oh, Fred. Fred! Even with your bloodstained shirt, I still love you! Woot. Both for her comma and her love of that sorry kid. I do not care,
for I know he was already dead. I knew you, of all zombies, would like this gift. Who wrote that!? FRED likes brain, toenails, and eyelashes. Fred , broke a tooth on an eyeball. subject verb No. Wrong. And wrong. Do NOT put me here. Although, there was enough air in the chamber, Fred thought he would suffocate anyway. Bad form. Interesting form. Fred had a great idea, he bought his own goat. I am Ruffles, and I am the most comma correct goat around. Finally! An intellectual. No offense, Fred. Blarg, blarg blarggle blarggledy blarg, blar blarg bl. by Karen Blaak
edited by Shelley Engstrom Final comma (before and) is optional,
but helpful 0-3 words: No comma
4-6: May or may not need comma
7+: Needs a comma We don't use "and" between some
adjectives:
The man has shiny red hair.
That lovely old lady is her mother. Rule #4:
Use a comma after
transitional phrases, direct statements, and moments of pause - In addition, you may not bring your friend.
- Charlie, I don't think you should say that.
- Well, I suppose we should eat.
(Use a comma with Yes, ... or No, ...
as well) We do not need a set of commas for restrictive clauses,
which are necessary for the meaning of the sentence.

People who live in glass houses should not throw stones. Remember:
If the independent clause PRECEDES the
dependent clause, we DO NOT use a comma. Fred and Ted went to Paris together because they were such good friends. Rule # 6:
Use a comma to separate a participial phrase from the independent clause Having swept the court, the zombies proceeded to play three sets of tennis.

Mr. Swift was very gentle with his daughter, sensing that she was about to cry. Watching zombie movies is a way for me to relax. Correct: Incorrect: (This is a comma splice) Rule #10: Miscellaneous Numbers: Places: Dates: Titles: More than 350,000 people gathered on the Washington Mall. San Diego, California The attacks on the morning of Tuesday, September 11, 2001, took the U.S. by surprise. Jaime Mejía, PhD, will speak about zombie studies.
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