better
t h e s i s   s t a t e m e n t s
better
BETTER
STATEMENTS
THESIS
dr.
gideon
burton
why?
coherence
engagement
clarity
1 topic
2 issue
3 rationale
4 qualification
5 reorder &
revise
{quick
method}
Topic
Issue
Rationale
Qualification
Gather and review your prewriting and notes
Take a stand on the topic, turning it into an issue
Make an “although” clause for context or to acknowledge an opposing view.
Combine the previous steps to make a single, polished thesis statement.
Animal rights
PETA?
ethics of testing?
like minority rights?
claim types
Policy claim
Definition claim
Comparison claim
Evaluation claim
Cause/Effect claim
(“should”)
(“is like/unlike”)
(“is” / “was”)
(“is good/bad”)
(“results/resulted in”)
“Animals should not be given the same rights as humans”
“Suffering for animals is no different than suffering for humans."
“It's better for animals to be tested than for humans to die.”
“Animals are not humans.”
"Animal testing has not led to general disregard for life."
“Animals should not be given the same rights as humans”
"Although some claim that all life is equally sacred..."
“…because they are fundamentally different from humans.”
1.Qualification (“Although…”) 
2.Issue (Claim) 
3.Rationale (“because...”)
“Although some claim that all life is equally sacred… (Qualification) animals should not be given the same rights as humans… (Claim) …because they are fundamentally different from humans.” (Rationale)
“Although some maintain that all life is equally sacred, animals should not be given the same rights as humans because they are fundamentally different from them.”
I. Introduction
II. Arguments about the sacredness of life 
III. My claim: Don’t give animals human rights 
IV. Evidence: Difference between humans and animals 
V. Conclusion
thesis as outline
A thesis statement in this form may not be the best way to outline your paper. It does, however, suggest vital elements that ought to be included.
While a qualifying statement and a rationale can flesh out a good thesis statement, the “issue” (where you state a claim) is the core of your thesis.
cautions
A great 
thesis statement…
specific
is
beyond
the known
the accepted
will
divide
educated
audience
suggests
there are
real stakes
prepares
for what's
coming
goes
an
readers
Reorder & Revise
Create a “because” clause, giving the main reason or rationale for your position
dr. gideon o. burton
brigham young university
keep order
give direction
& clarity
at every level
of your writing
giving readers confidence
you will keep them oriented
directed on a clear path
until the whole picture
is clear
thesis
statements
a quick method
types of claims
examples